I am so confused and please bear with me. I want to take charge of my own health but

[dancer67]

I don't know how to!!!

 

I am not a very good decision maker. I do alot of reading. Maybe to much reading. Maybe this is my problem. (I think the internet can be a good thing at times, but other times can be a very scary thing).

 

Most of you know I have health anxiety.

 

My first question is this. Can anyone recommend a good book on how to overcome Health Anxiety?

 

The other issue is this. Some of you also know that I have been having some issues with my monthly cycle. I know at my age(42 in a few weeks) things can start going haywire. Plus, I am a smoker, and started my period at the age of 12. I have had children, and no issues ever with my monthly cycles.

 

So in August and September, imagine my surprise that I was spotting. Never gave it a thought until a friend of mine got me all worked up and said spotting between periods is never a good sign. So panicking, I went to GYN and had exam and pap which were normal. He just said it could possibly be from a new medication I started.

 

Then this month I didn't get it at all. The first day of my LMP was 09/14/09. I went back and got a pregnancy test(blood) and was negative, and a trans-vag U/S. Results of that indicated I had a thickened uterine lining, and a follicular cyst. I still do not have my period.

 

The GYN tells me to wait two weeks( which would take me a week from this Tuesday) and that if I do not get it, he would do endo biopsy, blood work, and start me on Provera to jump start it.

 

I am not so sure about all of this now.

 

Someone here made a comment to the effect of "Why do you need to jump start it if you have only missed one period?"

 

Okay, so that is my question. I hear of SO many women who skip periods for months at a time and never go to the Dr's.

 

Yet mine wants to do a biopsy(which by the way scares me to DEATH) and put me on a medication I know nothing about.

 

So, I am trying to figure out about female hormones, premenopause, ovulation etc etc.................At my age anyways.

 

What REALLY confuses me is this. Hyperplasia and thickened endometrium. Now, doesn't EVERY woman have a thickened uterine lining? Especially when you have always ovulated? If you had a tran-vag ultra sound, wouldn't that show the Dr if it is hyperplasia or just a regular thickened lining like you are going to start your period? And what if you are done ovulating??? You are not going to ovulate forever, and you lining is still thick? That's bad??

 

And what about these women who just go months without a period, then get a period, go months again without one, and never go to the Dr????? Does this mean they ALL have a thickened endo lining and have hyperplasia?

 

So if you never have a period, it will always build up and become hyperplasia and you ALWAYS have to take Provera to get it going to avoid having a build up and not get hyperplasia??

 

I want to take charge of my own health care and make the right decisions here. But I cannot do that if I do not have the knowledge to make the decisions. I just do not want to say yes, to everything my Dr wants to do if I do not think it is necessary to do so. KWIM?

 

I know thousands of women have screwy periods all the time, and never go to a Dr and they are just fine. They just pass it off as , well must be a screwed up month, or must be going through the "change".

 

I guess I need to know, what really warrants an endometrial biopsy, and what warrants Provera? Or should Provera be tried first, and then if my periods do not straighten out, THEN do an endo biopsy????? Do nothing?

 

I do not want to go overboard. Thousands of years ago women went through all of this without Dr's.

 

I apologize if I keep bringing this up, but it is time for me to get on the bandwagon and make some informed decisions about *my* body.

 

Thank you:D

Edited October 24, 2009 by dancer67

[readwithem]

I think you would get a lot from this book.

[dancer67]

Thank you. You are like the 10th person who recommended this book. I oredered it from Amazon. Thanks:D

[Sputterduck]

Wouldn't you say, at your age, missing a period is perfectly normal, healthy, and expected?

[elizabeth]

 

http://whyquit.com/ I smoked for 20 plus years and quit three years ago. It changed my attitude toward health related matters . I always was fearful and for good reason . Smoking is truly horrible for your health in ways that defy categorical listing as it is so completely destructive. You know this and want to quit but do not know how. When I understood what an addiction to nicotine was, I was able to get by the three day withdrawal and into abstinence. I never, ever, ever thought I could quit and felt helpless to this addiction. Habit does not come close to describing the dependence a nicotine user has . If you want to take charge of your health make nicotine addiction a thing of the past. Every day a new experience comes along to remind how awful it was psychologically, physiologically and biologically. The link I provided is well worth reading as even though I thought I knew about smoking it turns out that what I did not know was keeping me from trying to quit. The articles about cold turkey versus gradual withdrawal in the top center of the page absolutely floored me. I will say no more but trust me on this , if you quit you will be so very sorry you did not do it sooner as it is a whole new world .

[olan719]

I just want to offer :grouphug:. I know this is really bothering you, and as person that worries about health issues too, I can relate. You do seem to worry a bit more than me though. :D

 

The menstrual cycle can be confusing, and I hope you can find some answers. Perhaps in that book you ordered. Since you suffer from HA so much, I think you need to choose your friends wisely - like the one who told you that about spotting between periods... :tongue_smilie: People spot between periods, and it can mean nothing. Do you know that some people spot around ovuation, and it is NORMAL for them?? I try not to surround myself with people who are doomsdayers. Not that things can't indicate a problem, but for people like you (and me) that worry about everything, it can get you worked up over the most benign of issues.

 

Try to quit reading online so much! I say that kindly - I really do. I quit researching stuff online because it upset me so and sent my mind into a tailspin. As a person from the outside looking in, I really think this is not much for you to be concerned about TODAY. If this is a real problem and you need all those tests run, it will continue to be a problem and you will see the need to pursue it. Otherwise, you are robbing yourself of the joy of today. And you will never get THIS DAY back...

 

Off my soapbox know...I really do feel for you. I completely understand. :grouphug:

[Janet in Toronto]

Wouldn't you say, at your age, missing a period is perfectly normal, healthy, and expected?

 

:iagree: And for those of us who have always had irregular periods, being a couple of weeks late is no big deal. I realise that you have always been dead regular, but your getting to that age where hormones start to go a little wacky. I am surprised that your ob/gyn proposed such an intrusive approach.

 

If I can be honest, your doctor may have been trying to allay your fears by proposing the Provera and biopsy. Finding something "to do" for you, that in my estimation, is probably not necessary. (I'm not a doctor, but my mom is a retired ob/gyn and talked me through a lot throughout my childbearing years, LOL!). In all my years with irregular periods, I took Provera ONCE so that I would get a period and then start infertility treatments.

 

I agree with a previous poster that you need to surround yourself with positive people and stay off the medical websites, LOL!

[Tree House Academy]

It hurts me to see you struggling so much with this because I have been there so.many.times.

 

Please, go to the health anxiety forum and read the "Accepting your diagnosis" thread. Read it again and again if you need to. Your problem is NOT that you aren't taking control of your health....you issue is that you are questioning every decision your doctor is making. If you need to seek a second opinion, then please do. I consulted 4 (yea, 4) doctors when I had my issues because I was just.like.you. In the end, the result was the same. These doctors have a protocol that they follow. If you have abnormal cycles, they do an ultrasound and bloodwork. If those are normal, they do a biopsy. If it is fine, they start you on hormones - unless you turn them down. There isn't much more they can do. A biopsy rules out cancer and pre-cancer. That is the best thing to do if other things have been done and nothing worked.

 

Please, try to trust your doctor on this (or find a new doc). I am not saying this cold-heartedly...I am saying this because I know what you are going through. This is the HA talking.

[dancer67]

Wouldn't you say, at your age, missing a period is perfectly normal, healthy, and expected?

 

 

I want to say yes, but it was so "unexpected" which is why I question if this is normal or not. Yet, everything I have been told (U/S, pap, exam has been normal)

 

Honestly, I am scared to death of getting an Endo Biopsy. My SIL works in the OB/GYN office I go to as a medical asst(so she in the rooms), and she tells me that some women do okay with it, some don't(Some actually cry through the whole thing..OMG) . Depends on your tolerance for pain. And I have NONE. I am more scared of the procedure then the results. And as someone with Health Anxiety, the thought of taking anything I have never taken before(such as a calming drug like my Klonipon which I have not touched out of fear), makes it even worse. And forget being "put out", no way, no how.

 

I guess I could deal with this better if I had monthly cycle problems in the past. But I never, ever, ever have. Not even once. I had one abnormal pap years ago, but that is the extent of my "woman" problems. So to stop a period suddenly, to *me* is not normal.

 

I probably just confused you more....LOL

[dancer67]

I just want to offer :grouphug:. I know this is really bothering you, and as person that worries about health issues too, I can relate. You do seem to worry a bit more than me though. :D

 

 

 

Yes, I worry. It can be debilitating.

 

 

The menstrual cycle can be confusing, and I hope you can find some answers. Perhaps in that book you ordered. Since you suffer from HA so much, I think you need to choose your friends wisely - like the one who told you that about spotting between periods... :tongue_smilie: People spot between periods, and it can mean nothing. Do you know that some people spot around ovuation, and it is NORMAL for them?? I try not to surround myself with people who are doomsdayers. Not that things can't indicate a problem, but for people like you (and me) that worry about everything, it can get you worked up over the most benign of issues.

 

 

 

Well, I knew I wasn't spotting around ovualtion, I really just chocked it up to a medication switch. Until my friend told me that I should have it checked out since I had not been to the Dr's in three years. Dr. said he wasn't convinced it was a med switch issue. But I am currently off of it now.

 

Try to quit reading online so much! I say that kindly - I really do. I quit researching stuff online because it upset me so and sent my mind into a tailspin. As a person from the outside looking in, I really think this is not much for you to be concerned about TODAY. If this is a real problem and you need all those tests run, it will continue to be a problem and you will see the need to pursue it. Otherwise, you are robbing yourself of the joy of today. And you will never get THIS DAY back...

 

Off my soapbox know...I really do feel for you. I completely understand. :grouphug:

__________________

 

 

 

:iagree:

 

Now, trying really hard to do this. I just wish I knew how.

[dancer67]

It hurts me to see you struggling so much with this because I have been there so.many.times.

 

Please, go to the health anxiety forum and read the "Accepting your diagnosis" thread. Read it again and again if you need to. Your problem is NOT that you aren't taking control of your health....you issue is that you are questioning every decision your doctor is making. If you need to seek a second opinion, then please do. I consulted 4 (yea, 4) doctors when I had my issues because I was just.like.you. In the end, the result was the same. These doctors have a protocol that they follow. If you have abnormal cycles, they do an ultrasound and bloodwork. If those are normal, they do a biopsy. If it is fine, they start you on hormones - unless you turn them down. There isn't much more they can do. A biopsy rules out cancer and pre-cancer. That is the best thing to do if other things have been done and nothing worked.

 

 

Well, had the pap and U/S. Which is why I have no idea why he would want to do an Endo Biopsy. Without trying the Provera first. I didn't ask him though. And now, I cannot even remember if he said that he would try the Provera first and if he cannot get it regulated and I was all over the board in my cycles, he would then do Endo Biopsy. THAT is what scares me. Not the diagnosis.(well it does but not as much as that procedure).

 

Please, try to trust your doctor on this (or find a new doc). I am not saying this cold-heartedly...I am saying this because I know what you are going through. This is the HA talking.

 

 

I actually trust mr Dr 100%. But he does know I have HA. So I do not know if he is saying these things thinking he is calming my nerves or not. He actually only offered to do U/S if it made me "feel better". Then after consult, he said that I needed to give it a few weeks, and then something along the line of starting on Provera, and then said something like "Would I consider doing an endo biopsy then? Sure I would, but not now"

 

He said if he gave me Provera now, he would have to give it to about 95% of the women who came in there.

 

I hate it that I get confused over what he is saying. Like I do not get the endo lining thing. Can't you just tell from the U/S if it is normal or not? Can't you tell if it is hyperplasia or not? There are just to many questions and not enough clear answers. If I can go about my merry way, and avoid all this stuff, I would. Just let me be, let me get my period or not, and be done with it. I just have never heard anyone having to get an endo biopsy or provera for skipping periods. Women have had this happen all their lives and most do not even to to the Dr's. So does this mean I should have just let it go, and not have gone??

 

I am 42(well in a few weeks). Normal. For most women. Just not me. It just BOOM, happened, No signs no warning. If he would have just said "This is normal it happens to women your age all the time". I would have been fine, and not have given it a second thought. But he didn't say that. He does not believe it was a med change, or a pre/peri menopausal issue. He just said call in two weeks if you don't get it.

 

I woudn't care if I didn't get it the rest of my life now. But now he has meall worked up over this *could be* hyperplasia

thing. And an endo biopsy. THAT is what is scaring the cr** out of me.

 

Okay, I vented, I sound ridiculous I am sure. But I needed to get that off my chest.

[dancer67]

And for those of us who have always had irregular periods, being a couple of weeks late is no big deal. I realise that you have always been dead regular, but your getting to that age where hormones start to go a little wacky. I am surprised that your ob/gyn proposed such an intrusive approach.

 

 

:iagree:

If I can be honest, your doctor may have been trying to allay your fears by proposing the Provera and biopsy. Finding something "to do" for you, that in my estimation, is probably not necessary. (I'm not a doctor, but my mom is a retired ob/gyn and talked me through a lot throughout my childbearing years, LOL!).

 

Yes, I think that is what he was saying. Basically, I *think* he thought that I wanted him to do something about this NOW. And he started rambling off about "If this happens I will then do this, and if that happens I would then do that, sure but not now"

 

I think I need to ask him if he thinks all this is *necessary* or is it to just calm my fears? Because if it is not medically necessary, then I say no thanks.

 

I agree with a previous poster that you need to surround yourself with positive people and stay off the medical websites, LOL!

 

 

You know, before the internet was around, I never had this kind of HA before. Again, I think I may do to much reading. not to the point where I should be educated, but to the point of scaring myself to death.

 

I have had nightmares over this endo biopsy thing. If I don't relax I am going to never get my period. And stop crying everytime I go to the bathroom thinking I got it and it isn't there. Then my mind spinning back to that biopsy thing again.:confused:

[mom26]

"I have had nightmares over this endo biopsy thing."

 

I want to help put your mind at ease...

I just had one in the office a few months ago...I am 44 and have been having spotting mid period.My cycles are just beginning to change. My mom has a h/o uterine cancer (she was treated and has been cancer free for over 10 years) so on the spot my ob/gyn said, "Let's just do an endometrial biopsy now"...GULP!!!

Anyhow, to put your mind at ease, it was uncomfortable but not unbearable...

And it was pretty fast...the results were completely normal--pap was nl too- indicating that it is hormonal and not some other issue going on.

 

I hope this helps!!

Blessings,

Kathi

[dancer67]

"I have had nightmares over this endo biopsy thing."

 

I want to help put your mind at ease...

I just had one in the office a few months ago...I am 44 and have been having spotting mid period.My cycles are just beginning to change. My mom has a h/o uterine cancer (she was treated and has been cancer free for over 10 years) so on the spot my ob/gyn said, "Let's just do an endometrial biopsy now"...GULP!!!

Anyhow, to put your mind at ease, it was uncomfortable but not unbearable...

And it was pretty fast...the results were completely normal--pap was nl too- indicating that it is hormonal and not some other issue going on.

 

I hope this helps!!

 

 

Blessings,

Kathi

 

Yes, it does. Thank you:D

[Sumiller]

I just want to add that I was one of those 'regular like clockwork' people until sometime during my 43rd year. I started my cycle when I was 13 and it came every 3 weeks and 4 days (well except when I was pregnant). ;)

 

Anyway, sometime during the year after turning 43 I had a cycle that came over a week late. I just assumed I was pregnant and bought a test. It was negative. When the period finally did arrive it was very heavy. Then my cycle went back into it's regular rountine until a couple months later and wham! I missed one all together. That's when I made a Dr's appointment. Told her I thought maybe I was starting perimenopause and she promptly told me 'no, you are too young'. Well, since then, I have had a rollercoaster ride of late periods, spotty periods, heavy periods and no periods. . what I haven't had are my 'regular like clockwork' periods. So no matter what dear Dr. says, I am pretty sure I'm in the beginning stages of menopause. Especially since the usual tests all come back fine.

[dancer67]

I just want to add that I was one of those 'regular like clockwork' people until sometime during my 43rd year. I started my cycle when I was 13 and it came every 3 weeks and 4 days (well except when I was pregnant). ;)

 

Anyway, sometime during the year after turning 43 I had a cycle that came over a week late. I just assumed I was pregnant and bought a test. It was negative. When the period finally did arrive it was very heavy. Then my cycle went back into it's regular rountine until a couple months later and wham! I missed one all together. That's when I made a Dr's appointment. Told her I thought maybe I was starting perimenopause and she promptly told me 'no, you are too young'. Well, since then, I have had a rollercoaster ride of late periods, spotty periods, heavy periods and no periods. . what I haven't had are my 'regular like clockwork' periods. So no matter what dear Dr. says, I am pretty sure I'm in the beginning stages of menopause. Especially since the usual tests all come back fine.

 

My mother told me the other day she stopped her periods at 45. But I am not sure if I can believe her because she is mentally ill.

 

Did YOUR Dr. make you get an endo biopsy?

 

Thank you for sharing your story.

[Tree House Academy]

Well, had the pap and U/S. Which is why I have no idea why he would want to do an Endo Biopsy. Without trying the Provera first. I didn't ask him though. And now, I cannot even remember if he said that he would try the Provera first and if he cannot get it regulated and I was all over the board in my cycles, he would then do Endo Biopsy. THAT is what scares me. Not the diagnosis.(well it does but not as much as that procedure).

 

I actually trust mr Dr 100%. But he does know I have HA. So I do not know if he is saying these things thinking he is calming my nerves or not. He actually only offered to do U/S if it made me "feel better". Then after consult, he said that I needed to give it a few weeks, and then something along the line of starting on Provera, and then said something like "Would I consider doing an endo biopsy then? Sure I would, but not now"

 

He said if he gave me Provera now, he would have to give it to about 95% of the women who came in there.

 

I hate it that I get confused over what he is saying. Like I do not get the endo lining thing. Can't you just tell from the U/S if it is normal or not? Can't you tell if it is hyperplasia or not? There are just to many questions and not enough clear answers. If I can go about my merry way, and avoid all this stuff, I would. Just let me be, let me get my period or not, and be done with it. I just have never heard anyone having to get an endo biopsy or provera for skipping periods. Women have had this happen all their lives and most do not even to to the Dr's. So does this mean I should have just let it go, and not have gone??

 

I am 42(well in a few weeks). Normal. For most women. Just not me. It just BOOM, happened, No signs no warning. If he would have just said "This is normal it happens to women your age all the time". I would have been fine, and not have given it a second thought. But he didn't say that. He does not believe it was a med change, or a pre/peri menopausal issue. He just said call in two weeks if you don't get it.

 

I woudn't care if I didn't get it the rest of my life now. But now he has meall worked up over this *could be* hyperplasia

thing. And an endo biopsy. THAT is what is scaring the cr** out of me.

 

Okay, I vented, I sound ridiculous I am sure. But I needed to get that off my chest.

 

The biopsy is not tough - waiting on the results was a nightmare for me (of course, having HA and all). The doctor likely wants to ease your mind. He would not be recommending things like this if you weren't there asking him what in the world was wrong with you. KWIM?

 

My GYN is wonderful...but he knows me. He has learned, over the years, that giving me medical tests really sends me into oblivion. Now, he doesnt' even recommend them unless HE needs them to be done. Before he realized the extent of my HA, he did tests because he thought they would ease my mind. They did...than I was back in his office two weeks later worried about something else. It is a NEVERENDING cycle and I think you know that.

 

If you trust him, then go with his advice. The biopsy is going to be uncomfortable and scary for about a week until you get the results...then you can rest assured that your thickened lining is no more than just a hormonal issue.

 

If it makes you feel better to have the blood work first, then do the biopsy if it comes back normal, then tell him that. I doubt he is going to be pushing this biopsy.

 

And please remember that stress can really reak havoc with your cycle...even if it never has before (mind didn't either), it may have started now.

 

:grouphug: I know how hard this is. Please try to focus on something else - get your mind off of it for a bit if you can. Dwelling on every detail and trying to read his mind and analyze each part of each word he said is going to drive you bonkers...and it is part of the health anxiety.

[dancer67]

Rebecca

 

Thank you. So you don't think he will push me for an endo unless he thinks it is medically necessary? Kind of like the U/S issue. He suggested it "if it will make you feel better I will send you for one". Even though I know he didn't think it was necessary.

 

He is not the type of guy who is one for jumping the gun. He rules everything(minor) out first. He did say since I came off that new medication to see if it made a difference. That was the next step, since U/S and pap was clear.

 

I do believe though, that he thought I wanted all these tests done now to ease my mind, when in fact, yes the endo biopsy would ease my mind, but the whole process scares me. But there was no way in agreeance to do anything yet. It was way to early. A missed period to him is something he sees all the time.

 

Yep, that is our HA at work:grouphug:to you for understanding.

 

So, right now I am dealing with my daughter and (possible, even though that is what they say it is) Swine Flu. So that is enough to keep my mind off of anything.