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Retraining your child to be neater ...


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If you hadn't been allowed to teach your child household chores for many years and then decided that you wanted a much cleaner/neater home, how would you train them (now high school age) to help you around the house? During my second and third marriages I was not allowed to teach my daughter anything. Now I have been single again for a few years and am finally not working outside the home (I work from home) and my not-so-neat home is driving me crazy. My daughter is cooperative in most ways, but is ADHD so has to be reminded (usually multiple times) to do anything. I don't think that it is that she doesn't want to help. I think she just doesn't know how.

 

Does anyone have any suggestions for me in this area that might help?

 

Thanks,

Luanne

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Building new habits is a matter of practice. Someone here (I can't remember who!) posted http://www.chorebuster.net and I've put it into practice for myself and my dd. I think it's been good for us. I have my chart set up so that most chores are shared (there are a few that dd won't do and some I won't do--she does the cat box, for example, because it was part of the deal for getting cats. I haul the cans to the curb because they're too heavy for her).

 

I like that the site mixes up the chores, so every day is a bit different. There are some that are daily chores, obviously, but it's like having a surprise each day! LOL

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Why don't you try doing your chores together. That way you can keep her on task and train her at the same time. You can still follow a schedule so you know what and when to clean. For example, when it is time to clean the kitchen have her wipe down the appliances and cabinets while you do something else.

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Guest lrmom

American Girl to be exact. Write out 10 chores on individual slips of paper. Place in basket and when you need her to do something tell her to pick one out and do the task right away. That way you have a list but it isn't too overwhelming for her. The magazine suggesting putting in a slip of paper with something fun on it, (15 minute break of some kind), but that one might not work for you.

 

All the best.

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my older dds responded well to flylady in their teenage years. it was fun, and it wasn't mom telling them what to do.

 

we developed our evening and morning routines together. that took a while. then we began to add in other things. 5-minute room rescues are still easier than other things for all of us, because they have a set time limit, and playing "beat the clock" can actually be fun : )

 

good luck!

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