Phone skills....

[newbie]

We have the netiquette down pat. Phone skills are not so good, oldest dd has to talk to teachers on phone, but every time she does she chokes. The other day she had a college call, and she choked. Fortunately, it wasnt one she is interested in.

 

Are there any online programs? Or any phone skill tutors?

 

Suggestions?

[Barb_]

Do you have her make calls that aren't essential? For instance, calling a place for directions or to make an appointment. You could make her your personal assistant and have her make many of your calls for you. Coach her ahead of time what to say and write down all the information she'll need in response to possible questions. Really, consistant practice is the only thing that will build confidence. My daughter had this problem until she volunteered at the Habitat for Humanity store. They put her on phones which initially scared her to death. But she developed a terrific phone personae as a result.

 

Barb

 

ETA: Just wanted to add that I have a little bit of this myself. I dread and avoid phone calls to strangers until I can no longer procrastinate. I depend heavily on body language to figure people out and phone calls make me feel handicapped.

[SusanNN]

LOL!

 

Just joking ---- this was ME as a young person! I still am not great with the phone for inexplicable reasons. I am fine in person and writing. My advice is to not feed into avoidance - it will only get worse and more overwhelming. As with any phobia-type fear (sorry if that's too strong - mostly talking about myself!) - the way to grow is by exposing yourself to what you're afraid of - if necessary, incrementally. The advice re starting with "unimportant" calls was good. Practice, practice and then the "important" calls won't seem so full of pressure.

[athena1277]

Make her order pizza. I remember being in college and wanting to order pizza with friends and no one wanted to make the call! I have no idea why we were afraid to order a pizza on the phone, but could easily order at the drive thru at McDonald's. :confused:

[SherryTX]

All my kids need to get better in this area. I find it particularly annoying because I have to have good phone skills, because my work (well when I am working!) depends on it.

 

Yesterday I was out and about and a friend called. My oldest daughter answered the phone, and politely let my friend know I wasn't home. And that was IT! If I hadn't checked the caller ID I would have NEVER known she called. I called and we chatted, and she mentioned one of the kids let her know I wasn't available.

 

So I asked my 13 year old (the oldest daughter) why she didn't tell me. She looked sheepish and said "sorry". I was nice about it (no reason to get all crabby of course) and told her next time to please ASK who is calling for me, and WRITE it down.

 

It is interesting, because my 7 and 9 year old, while they don't take messages well either, have very good phone skills when they make calls themselves and always get to the point. However, even my 18 year old, has really bad phone skills and the 13 and 11 year old are no better.

 

Here is what I am thinking of doing: of putting together a few phone scripts for them. This is how I learned to get better on the phone when I was early in my career, and I should have done this years ago for my kids.

 

Simple things. For example, when answering the phone, making sure they ask "May I ask who is calling" and if myself or my husband is not home "he/she is not available now - but please give me your number and I will let them know you called".

 

On another subject - email. My 7 year old seems to be amazingly gifted when communicating via email hahah. She always uses concise and complete sentences for someone her age. My kids all send me emails, and out of all of them, she is the best at it. This is because she hasn't been tainted by falling into "text message" or instant message speak, I think. (My 9 year old is pretty good for the same reason as well.)

 

I was appalled when my 13 year old forwarded me an email message on Friday. She brought home information on a 2D video game creator summer camp, and there was no information regarding cost on the flier. I asked her to please send an email to the contact person requesting further information.

When she forwarded me the email with the info, I saw that her outgoing message was "What is the cost?" I told her that she needs to write such emails as if she was writing a formal business letter, because she wants to be sure the recipient understands what program, etc.

 

Sure, the person DID - but I still think some one her age should understand when to use a more formal writing style even if it is in email. I am appalled at how many emails I have received from job applicants over the years (many in the engineering and other professional trades) where their email sounds like a teenager wrote it.

 

I am sure we all teach our kids when to be more formal and when it is okay to be more casual depending on the social settings while in person. I need to focus more on teaching them this for their email and phone communications as well. I am a bit embarrassed that I have let this fall by the wayside!

Edited April 5, 2009 by SherryTX
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[SherryTX]

Make her order pizza. I remember being in college and wanting to order pizza with friends and no one wanted to make the call! I have no idea why we were afraid to order a pizza on the phone, but could easily order at the drive thru at McDonald's. :confused:

 

That is actually a great suggestion!

[newbie]

All great ideas, I think I will start having her answer the phone too. I dont do that. I guess that is my first step.