Anybody have experience educating someone else's child?

[bugs]

I just want to know how it worked out for you. What were the pros and cons you experienced?

 

I am in this situation now but am not sure if I'll do it again next year. He's a nice kid but because he's not mine I stress out when he doesn't complete his work (he works at a slower pace than my kids and often takes work home). I guess that's the other issue. Because he works at a pace different than my kids I feel like I am planning for 3 (I know that sounds wimpy to those of you with more than 2 children). I am concerned because I believe I should be giving him work that would be more at his pace but am concerned on how he would feel being placed behind my younger child and how my older one would feel believing I am giving this boy "easier" work.

 

Well, I think I rambled a bit. Any advice would be helpful.

[lmrich]

Yes I am doing this now. First off, make sure you are getting paid; it is too much to do out of the kindness of your heart.

 

The kid I homeschool is from a great family, but he is busy and he is sick a lot. It is quite clear that he is working at a pace that I would not approve of for one of my own kids. He never finishes a novel on time or a paper. Luckily, he is a smart kid and catches on quickly.

 

My advice to you: for math have him to do TT or Saxon dive something that is self instruction and self grading. That way if he is behind by the end of the school year you can simply have him work on it in the summer. I also have my student work in workbooks more than I would like (but he seems to like them) Wordly Wise, Analogies, Maps etc. He does IEW ancients and is not half way done yet. He does history and science with us but his notebook is wimpy compared to my first grader, he is in 5th.

 

So give yourself a break on how much the kid does, if he misses school or doesn't do his homework, move on, but be sure to communicate to it to his parents. I have found that some people are a LOT more relaxed about school than I am. Ultimately the parents are responsible for thier kid's education and if they are not willing to "police" him at home to finish a paper or to do his reading than what can I do about it? I am sad that he is not finishing the novels on time and that he is missing out on really good literature, but I can't go to his house and nag him.

 

I don't know if this helped all, but good luck.

[usetoschool]

I am and at first I was frustrated because I wanted the same standard for them that I have for my own kids. I would get annoyed when the mom would watch tv with the child instead of reading and stuff like that. I had to take a breath and realize they are not my kids, their parents are responsible and accountable and I just need to do the best I can with what time I have. Some I get paid for, some I don't, but I also do it so my caboose child will have kids to play with and because I just enjoy doing it and have the time and resources right now, so the money would be nice, but not my first priority. The hardest part is keeping the relationship with the family and child friendly and professional. Depending on how well you know the family it probably won't help to tell them what to do. The child got to this point for a reason. Maybe it wasn't his family, but if it is, you won't be able to change that and you will just damage your relationship. You will know best whether it is a good idea to talk to the parents. Mostly I just let it go because in the end I am just a friend doing them a favor and my main goal is to help the kid as much as I can.

 

It is hard when you feel like you have your curriculum all layed out and have to change it around to accomodate another kid. It took me a long time, tweaking and rearranging, to set up a schedule of what to do together and how to have one kid working independantly so I can work one on one with the other at the same time.

 

Hope it works out for you. It is rewarding and worth it to help someone else with the skills you have developed.

[Ohdanigirl]

I did this with two brother inlaws, but they lived with me at the time. The issue was that they had never really been required to study or read much so they fought every step of the way. At first it was very hard, but then I told myself that they had been raised differently and needed time to get used to it. I went slowly and started expecting more and more as they got used to it. Kind of like...walk before you run. But still a lot of work the first year. I would also talk to the mother though, if she is going to hinder any progress you make then she really doesn't value all the work you are doing. Good luck.

[bugs]

for the encouragement.

 

I do get paid - not tons but they don't have a lot to spare. I do have high expectations , and am pretty regimented; I have spoken with mom. She is on board to allow the child to "fail" when he doesn't do his work (he gets a 0 if he doesn't turn things in on time). He hasn't been expected to read much until this time so this is where he struggles.

 

OBTW - Mom is actually very encouraging to me and really appreciates the work I put in. Since my love language is "words of encouragement" her words keep me motivated. If she wasn't this way, I know I wouldn't continue past this year.

Edited March 10, 2009 by bugs

[amy g.]

I did this for 4 years. It sounds like you are already handling it better than I did, because I could never really get past the junk food and TV mentality that he had at home.

 

I believe that I made a lasting contribution to his life. We are still very close.

 

Looking back, I see that what I gave him on my worst day was still better than he would have gotten in a school environment.

 

I would consider doing it again in the right situation.