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wwyd for this child--objective opinions wanted...

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I have a 16yo 10th grader, in public school for the first time in 10 years this fall. I also have a 17yo 12th grader and a just turned 15yo 9th grader.


The 10th grader has always been more emotionally immature than my other kids (I also have a 7th, 4th, K and 3yo). which is why we started her late in Kindergarten. She blossomed being homeschooled, though she still cried in public speaking co-op in 7th grade and struggled with shyness. Her siblings that are in high school with her are doing exceptionally well---all As, exempting out of all but one or two of their midterms next week. She feels dumb.


She's doing well socially in public school, and with her homework and classwork. but the quizzes and tests in her core classes are a disaster (except in biology, where the teacher reviews previous concepts covered every day before moving on). She is in honors or ap classes for english and history because the guidance counselor wanted to keep her away from behavior problems. we've met with the teachers and her guidance counselor, and they all said, yes, she's a wonderful student. she gets As on all her homework/classwork but she doesn't test well. their recommendation was to have her tested for a LD at the local university to the tune of $400 and 6-8 weeks turn around time. we'll be gone by then, and we don't have the money. I know some of the ESE kids there that will graduate this year and I don't understand how they can get help, but my daughter who just doesn't test well can't. at another county school where a friend of mine teaches french, they allow students alternative ways to test. I found out from my oldest daughter that this high school has a "testing lab" for that very reason. why didn't one single teacher bring that up to us? especially knowing we are new to the school?


here's the rub: she's failing math and spanish. we're moving to another state at the end of this month. she will have to test into the new school district (Pa. here in FL they can't believe they won't just take her transcripts). She really wants to be homeschooled again. We're moving back "home" after being gone for 13years. Her good friends are homeschooled back there, but they go to a one day a week/all day co-op and they have no room, only a waiting list for next year. there's no guarantee she'd even get in then.


she is very social. i would love to homeschool her again but I know she'd really miss meeting new friends or spending time with the friends she has there.


it was my husband's decision to send them all to school, with the hopes that we'd be moving back home and it would be easier to get them in the school system. I don't want to pull her out of public school and make her think she's dumb and couldn't handle it. but I don't want her to stay in public school and think she's dumb and she can't handle it. she's stressed, is moody because of it, and I just don't know what the answer is.


help me see which way to go for this child. she doesn't aspire to go to college, maybe business or beauty school, though she has said she might want to be an elementary physical education teacher (which I think she would be GREAT as...she's very good with children and extremely athletic).

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Gosh. I don't know. Since you're moving soon, I would wait until you talk to the folks at the new school before you make any decisions about testing.


My son doesn't test well, but partly it's a time pressure thing. When he's doing homework, he can poke along at his own speed. Perhaps your daughter is simply unaccustomed to having a time limit?


I wish I had something more than sympathy to offer. I'm sorry you're facing this.

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I think she could homeschool, not be in the co-op until there's room, and still have time and opportunity to see the friends she has there (how does she know folks there already?).


She could try homeschooling again her senior year, if she wanted. I would also get her tested in Pa, because it will give you more information, and may change the way you school her.

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If the school thinks she has LDs they should not be telling you to pay for the testing. You can file a request for the Local Screening Committee (which includes you) to meet. At the time you meet the LSC will decide if further evaluation is necessary. If eval is necessary, the district get 65 school days to get it done and they meet again to decide what services she qualifies for. This could have gotten done if you'd made the request in October, but you didn't know that you weren't required to pay. I'd go ahead and make the request now even though you are moving, the school will have to work on it right up until you withdraw. Then take the paper work to the new district . the timeline will start again, but it will be a little easier because there will at least be a file that has some notes from her current teachers in it. . It's hard to start the process without anything--the schools want some information about the trouble the student is having and it's helpful for it to not just be anecdotal from mom.


I think you could probably homeschool her too. However, getting her labeled may be useful. If you have an LD and documented accomations, you get those accomodations on the SAT. So, if one of the accomodations at school is extended test time, you get that on the SAT. Additionally, the label can help you get accomodations at CC and university.


If you homeschool and cannot get into the coop, are there other opportunities for her to be out and about? Does she participate in sports or can she get a job? Is there a subject she is passionate about, which would provide a regular volunteer opportunity? If it were my dd, she'd spend all her time at the ASPCA, but there might be things through local parks, church, ect.

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Hey Jodi,


Lots of changes coming for you all! Good changes I hope!


I'm not sure I would leave one of my kids in ps if 1) s/he was failing some important academic classes and 2) the ps wasn't helpful in finding some assistance. Maybe the PA school will be more helpful? If not, I guess you have to make a decision whether sending her to school for social reasons outweighs the stress and academic issues. If you are sending her for the diploma, could you enroll in a charter school or umbrella school?


Jodi, I pray that this move goes well for all of you! May you enjoy lots of snow this winter and no humidity next summer!



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