What Questions to Ask School?

[La Condessa]

My oldest will be K-aged next fall, and in spite of my long-term plans to homeschool, I am going to be calling the local school to find out more specifics about it. (I am highly skeptical there is any chance of this school fitting our needs, but my daughter insists that she doesn't want to be homeschooled, and my husband strongly feels that we should take her opinion into consideration.)

 

So, what should I ask? How do I tell if they really implement their stated policies? My daughter is a little ahead--is it better to give specific information on that, so they can give me specific answers (ie. "She is currently doing first grade math. How will you accommodate a Ker working 2 years ahead in one subject?") or will that come off as pushy or braggy; should I just keep it more general?

[debi21]

Would love to hear answers. We are in the same situation, but also considering multiple schools. When I emailed schools I got no answers from most schools. So I think calling is the way to go. The one school that answered said they didn't differentiate in K but that the teachers challenged each student. Whatever that means. I am also thinking about directly calling 2 gifted coordinators, one for the local district and one for a particular school outside the district. For them I am planning on saying, I don't know if he's gifted, but he is working at least a grade ahead in both language arts and math, and ask their recommendation.

[MeghanL]

I think I would be asking questions of your daughter instead of the school. Does she want to go to school because her entire social network is going to school? If so, then I would start asking questions of your local homeschool community to find out opportunities for your daughter to be social (this does not mean signing up for more classes where the kids do not get to know each other, but clubs that are open and the kids are allowed and encouraged to talk!). 

Since you are willing to give leverage to your child's opinion on the matter, see if you can solve the worries she has. If she isn't concerned about where the local public school rates on the state graduation test, telling her that it's not a quality school isn't going to change her opinion on the matter, you know?

[Momling]

I'd go in and talk with the school secretary about arranging a visit. Check out several of the classes if possible. Try and get a feel for the atmosphere of the classroom and school.

It's naturally hard to talk to a teacher during class because they're teaching or preparing, but ask if you can set up a meeting or if it would be easier to find answers to your questions via email.

 

Kindergarten and first grade classrooms have such a huge range of abilities - with some kids not yet knowing the alphabet and others able to read adult-length novels. So I think it's good to ask how the teacher meets the needs of all the kids. I wouldn't go into much detail if you feel your child is exceptionally bright, just ask in general.

[debi21]

Reporting back to say I'd like to hear how your attempts at contacting the school goes. I can't seem to reach anyone at any school by phone. It's frustrating. I feel like I might have to show up in person, which I am really loathe to do with my two under-5 kids in tow. In the interim, I have sent more emails.

 

In response to Meghan's comments, I really can't see how you are going to successfully reason with a 4 or 5 year old and convince them that homeschooling is the better choice. If you are going to go with homeschooling, I think you just have to set the boundary and say no to school. If you are going to let her try public school and see if she hates it or if she doesn't learn anything, then go that route. If I tried to get my four year old, who I do think is moderately gifted, to articulate why he wants to go to school, I am not sure he could. Mainly because he hears from his peers that is what you do. And although I have been h.s.'ing him for preschool, he views it as a progression to be old enough to go and have a "real" teacher.

 

What I would like to ask in a classroom setting is to see what the highest achieving kids in a class are doing in math and reading. But that assumes someone lets me observe a class.

 

[newhsmom]

I  always recommend a school visit.  You can really pick up a lot from visiting classrooms and asking questions.  What are the kindergarteners working on in class at this point of the year?  What work do you see displayed?  What is the climate of the school? 

 

I would be really concerned that the average public school could adequately meet the needs of a child working two years ahead.  Definitely find out about the gifted program.  In my district, it is a pull-out program and the kids are only involved for an hour a day, but every district has different ways of meeting the needs of the gifted.  You might also want to consider private school if you don't think that homeschooling is a viable option.  In my area many of the private schools are a year ahead of the public schools.  Of course, that might not be the case in your area, but I would definitely check into that as well. 

 

 

[La Condessa]

I think I would be asking questions of your daughter instead of the school. Does she want to go to school because her entire social network is going to school? If so, then I would start asking questions of your local homeschool community to find out opportunities for your daughter to be social (this does not mean signing up for more classes where the kids do not get to know each other, but clubs that are open and the kids are allowed and encouraged to talk!). 

Since you are willing to give leverage to your child's opinion on the matter, see if you can solve the worries she has. If she isn't concerned about where the local public school rates on the state graduation test, telling her that it's not a quality school isn't going to change her opinion on the matter, you know?

  

In response to Meghan's comments, I really can't see how you are going to successfully reason with a 4 or 5 year old and convince them that homeschooling is the better choice. If you are going to go with homeschooling, I think you just have to set the boundary and say no to school. If you are going to let her try public school and see if she hates it or if she doesn't learn anything, then go that route. If I tried to get my four year old, who I do think is moderately gifted, to articulate why he wants to go to school, I am not sure he could. Mainly because he hears from his peers that is what you do. And although I have been h.s.'ing him for preschool, he views it as a progression to be old enough to go and have a "real" teacher.

 

My daughter says she wants to go to school "at the building" because then she could have a 'real' teacher who she thinks could teach her lots more things, she could make lots of friends and get to see them every day, and because they have a playground at the school. This was followed by a not-so-subtle, "You know, Mom, some kids have a playground at their house." I have pointed out that most of her friends would not be going to that school, and she responded, "But I could make new friends!" Personally, I don't think you leave a decision like this up to a four-year-old, but what it really comes down to is that my husband loved his school experience and thinks that she would love it, too. And he doesn't see any problem with having everything be easy and never challenging her, as that's how it was for him, and he enjoyed it.

[La Condessa]

I  always recommend a school visit.  You can really pick up a lot from visiting classrooms and asking questions.  What are the kindergarteners working on in class at this point of the year?  What work do you see displayed?  What is the climate of the school? 

 

I would be really concerned that the average public school could adequately meet the needs of a child working two years ahead.  Definitely find out about the gifted program.  In my district, it is a pull-out program and the kids are only involved for an hour a day, but every district has different ways of meeting the needs of the gifted.  You might also want to consider private school if you don't think that homeschooling is a viable option.  In my area many of the private schools are a year ahead of the public schools.  Of course, that might not be the case in your area, but I would definitely check into that as well.

 

Unfortunately, this school is the only possibility. We live in a small, rural retirement town. There is a very small private Christian school 40 min. drive away, but from what I've heard it's nothing to rave about.

 

  

I'd go in and talk with the school secretary about arranging a visit. Check out several of the classes if possible. Try and get a feel for the atmosphere of the classroom and school.

It's naturally hard to talk to a teacher during class because they're teaching or preparing, but ask if you can set up a meeting or if it would be easier to find answers to your questions via email.

Kindergarten and first grade classrooms have such a huge range of abilities - with some kids not yet knowing the alphabet and others able to read adult-length novels. So I think it's good to ask how the teacher meets the needs of all the kids. I wouldn't go into much detail if you feel your child is exceptionally bright, just ask in general.

  

 

Thank you. When you say check out several classes, do you mean several K classes, or several classes of different levels?

 

Reporting back to say I'd like to hear how your attempts at contacting the school goes. I can't seem to reach anyone at any school by phone. It's frustrating. I feel like I might have to show up in person, which I am really loathe to do with my two under-5 kids in tow. In the interim, I have sent .

That is really bizarre that they won't even respond to you. Good luck.

[katilac]

  

My daughter says she wants to go to school "at the building" because then she could have a 'real' teacher who she thinks could teach her lots more things, she could make lots of friends and get to see them every day, and because they have a playground at the school. This was followed by a not-so-subtle, "You know, Mom, some kids have a playground at their house." I have pointed out that most of her friends would not be going to that school, and she responded, "But I could make new friends!" Personally, I don't think you leave a decision like this up to a four-year-old, but what it really comes down to is that my husband loved his school experience and thinks that she would love it, too. And he doesn't see any problem with having everything be easy and never challenging her, as that's how it was for him, and he enjoyed it.

 

I would join a homeschool group TODAY. 

 

And possibly buy her a playset  :lol:

 

Seriously, those sound like idealized surface reasons - not that they aren't important, they are very important to her, but those objections are often easy to overcome. She probably thinks she is going to out on that cool playground all the time, y'know? And the alternative she sees is staying home with mom. 

 

If her opinion is going to weigh heavily, and you want to h/s, the only way to do it is to convince her that it's a worthy option. You need to provide her with concrete experiences of what homeschooling can be; right now, her only 'visual' is school. Go to park days, try to make friends she won't want to leave behind, assure her that she will still get to buy a cartoon character lunchbox and backpack. Buy some very cool homeschooling supplies, and let her be very involved in that. 

 

Also watch your wording. Kids at 5 & 6 are often long to 'go to school' as a rite of passage. So, when people ask you or her if she is 'going to school' next year, NEVER say no, we are home schooling. Always say yes, she is going to school next year! If they ask where, you can say "she is going to school at home next year." Semantics, yes, but very important semantics for some kids - they are crushed at the thought of not 'going to school.'

[La Condessa]

I would join a homeschool group TODAY.

 

And possibly buy her a playset.'

I guess I really ought to try again to get involved in the homeschool group, but we haven't had much luck with that in the past. Most of their activities are not for kids as young as mine, but in the summer they occassionally put out an email about a park day. Last summer we tried to go to one to make some friends--that meant skipping my little ones' naps and driving 40 min. each way to get there. Only one mom showed up with her 9 year old son, and they left after about 5 min. because his friends weren't there.

 

The more I consider educational options here with either the schools or homeschooling, the more I find myself thinking that maybe we need to move.

[FriedClams]

I would make a decision - with my husband - and then let the 4 year old know. I appreciate that 4 year olds have opinions but IMHO this is a parent decision, not a child one. If things go wrong - it's the adults who are responsible, not a 4 year old.

 

As a parent making a decision, I would be extremely concerned with putting my child in a school that won't answer or return calls to interested parents.

 

Best of luck with your decision.