How to help a slow-poke

[Hoot]

My son is slower than molasses at e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. He hates that he's slow but doesn't know what to do to speed up and, to be honest, I don't know what to do to help him. While this spills over into sports and pretty much every other area of life, that is not the most pressing concern. It is, instead, with school work. He typically starts around 8am and by 4pm he is usually STILL working and hasn't really even accomplished all that much. For instance, yesterday, by 4:30 he had finished a lesson of geometry, reading and taking notes on several pages in history, and reading a science chapter. That is all he managed to finish all day. We took a total of 45 min. to go to the orthodontist and an hour for lunch, but it still shouldn't take 5+ hours to complete those 3 things. There was so much more on the docket to get done yesterday but there was just no time.

 

He has no siblings to distract him. He isn't playing on the computer, texting, or listening to music while working. The work is not too hard for him and he gets excellent grades (though he does struggle with math at times). How can I help him?

[WishboneDawn]

I was a slow poke in school. What really helped was the day the teacher stuck a sheet to the door that we were to sign when we were done our math worksheet. It offered a bit of motivation and I was one of the first to sign it. Maybe a timer and a sheet he could log the time it takes to complere things so he could compete with himself a bit?

 

Pay close attention to why he's slow as well. Is he constantly distracted or day dreaming? Turns out I had innattentive ADD.

[PeterPan]

Yeah, my suggestion was going to mirror Dawn's, to go ahead and get him eval'ed. Processing speed is something they can actually measure. Could be a bigger picture reason.

 

Are you still using the things in your sig? Streams is boring as sin. Is he using TT Geo or something different? Did you use TT alg 2.0 or 1.0? I don't think TT Geo 1.0 would work well for some kids, but I'm looking forward to the 2.0. And have you actually SAT with him for his subjects? You may need to actually sit down beside him, look at the clock together, set an end time goal, and then you knit or play solitaire or something while you watch him work and bring him back into focus any time he drifts. And then when the time is up, if he has worked in a focused fashion, just stop.

 

Btw, you do know the wind was blowing yesterday? Like for real, some days are worse than others. Mondays are bad, windy days are bad. Oh, and yesterday was post-holiday and picnics and being out of routine, double bad. Diet can affect it. (omega 3) Does he have things to do afterward that HE wants to do? You talked about all these things to get done, but maybe they're things for you? My dd is only motivated by what she's motivated by.

 

And did he really read an entire chapter in his apologia gs? Like with comprehension and notes and the guides? That would take a long time and be a huge drag. I try to make my dd's tasks things she can go in and BANG OUT. That would not be an example of banging it out. That would be we got no science done so we're cramming it at the end. Banging it out is go in, read these 3 pages, make notes using this pre-typed outline. That's banging it out. I make guides now for things where it's important, and I try to structure tasks in short chunks like that. Doesn't matter if the rest of the world thinks another way works and that high school ought to be this long, hard slog. I've got a doer child who speeds up when we divide things into short, non-overwhelming chunks. That streams, well honestly I'd go roast marshmallows with it. I have a copy and no one should be made to read it. But science, yeah that can be chunked. Small chunks done quickly that add up over time. That's become our work pattern. Let's her stay engaged. And all the chunks are on a checklist. Yes it takes time for me to make that list and update it for each new week, and yes it takes time to make those guides. After a year of it, she has started doing some notes on her own. When they get the experience of working faster, then they know what it can/should feel like. I had to sit with her for a month or two for her TT math (after a couple months of realizing butt in chair didn't mean something was getting done), but once she caught on she was good. They need that experience of knowing what it CAN feel like to work a more efficient way.

[mathnerd]

I was a slowpoke when in school. I was the very last at doing things at school. For me the reason was because I could not work well if I did not have a tracking system and I was very bored and the schooling material was not challenging me enough so I was spending time daydreaming than paying attention. What worked was to set up a system to track me (I had to figure this one out by myself), being timed on my tasks and being grade skipped a level at school. The grade skip helped because, suddenly I had to pay more attention because things were not very easy and I had to get involved in class. And timing the tasks worked because I became accountable for my work.

My guess is that your child is gifted in some areas and needs more challenges. And it would help if you set up a system for him to track and time him: for example, make a spreadsheet and put it up in front of him every day (get his help in making it, if needed):

Thursday Schedule

8:00 AM- 8:40AM - geometry

8:45AM- 9:30 AM - history - notetaking etc

9:35 AM - 10:30 AM - Science chapter 5

10:35 AM - 11:20 AM - Orthodontist visit

11:30 AM - 12:30 PM - Lunch hour

12:30 PM - 1:15 PM - Geometry

1:15 PM - 3:00 PM - Sport #1

3:00 PM - 3:20 PM - Snack time

3:20 PM - 4:00 PM - Music practice

...

etc

 

When you list out things like that it also makes it easier to track which subjects are slower than the others and do more tweaking of the teaching methods or spend more time on it.

Good luck.

[Mom-ninja.]

I have a schedule like the one above but all it means is that ds gets less done in each subject and we find yourselves at the start of a new school year and not being done. I even have a visual timer on the wall right next to him.

 

I have the same problem. I know some of it is dyslexia related. A lot of it is daydreaming and losing focus. I have no idea how to fix the daydreaming lack of focus aspect.

[Hoot]

Are you still using the things in your sig? Streams is boring as sin. Is he using TT Geo or something different? Did you use TT alg 2.0 or 1.0? I don't think TT Geo 1.0 would work well for some kids, but I'm looking forward to the 2.0.

 

He has finished TT Alg 2.0 already but struggled with it. He thought he liked that he got immediate feedback on each and every problem, but once he started TT Geo 1.0 he realized that the other way was very distracting and discouraging when he would get one wrong. This way, he is focusing equally on each individual problem with no feedback until the end when we grade it. He's actually doing VERY well with it this way.

 

:laugh: I absolutely understand what you mean about Streams. Seriously, I thought it looked as dull as drywall. However, I handed him 3 or 4 texts to choose from - SWB's History of the Ancient World, Streams, Mystery of History and a couple of others and he LOVED Streams. It was totally his choice and it's one of his favorite subjects. My boy is a bit of an anomaly. Go figure.

 

 

And have you actually SAT with him for his subjects? You may need to actually sit down beside him, look at the clock together, set an end time goal, and then you knit or play solitaire or something while you watch him work and bring him back into focus any time he drifts. And then when the time is up, if he has worked in a focused fashion, just stop.

 

I did at the beginning of the year but stopped and allowed him to work wherever he was most comfortable since he was doing okay. Today, I decided to have him sit next to me while working and it seems to be a distraction in and of itself. Midway through his work, "Mom, what's this thing on my neck? It feels weird." or "Hey, could you look up when the National Spelling Bee is?" He's otherwise working pretty well and without daydreaming. I'm going to continue to shadow him while he's working and see if I can come up with any ideas.

 

 

Btw, you do know the wind was blowing yesterday? Like for real, some days are worse than others. Mondays are bad, windy days are bad. Oh, and yesterday was post-holiday and picnics and being out of routine, double bad. Diet can affect it. (omega 3)

 

I would chalk it up to something like that if it was an occasional thing, but the child has been slow with absolutely everything his entire life. This is not new. While I find it frustrating, he seems to find it doubly so. He really doesn't mind school work all that much, but the fact that it is taking so long to accomplish very little is discouraging to him.

 

 

Does he have things to do afterward that HE wants to do? You talked about all these things to get done, but maybe they're things for you? My dd is only motivated by what she's motivated by.

 

Oh, absolutely. When he's done he's done. He goes to his room to read, make animated movies, plays baseball or basketball outside etc. When I said there was more that needed to be done, I meant school work. He hadn't done any science labs or writing that had been planned but I just called it and said, "we're done, go play outside." Kids need to be kids too.

 

 

And did he really read an entire chapter in his apologia gs? Like with comprehension and notes and the guides? That would take a long time and be a huge drag.

 

We've moved on to Physical Science now but yes, he read the entire chapter. That isn't what I had assigned though. My assignment was to read about 9 pgs. and do the OYOs. He actually asked if he could read the entire chapter instead (no notes or anything) and then go back and piece it out with the OYOs the next day. He likes to get the broad overview of the chapter first by reading through the whole thing and then going back to re-read smaller sections and do the OYOs.

 

Small chunks done quickly that add up over time. That's become our work pattern. Let's her stay engaged. And all the chunks are on a checklist. Yes it takes time for me to make that list and update it for each new week, and yes it takes time to make those guides. After a year of it, she has started doing some notes on her own. When they get the experience of working faster, then they know what it can/should feel like. I had to sit with her for a month or two for her TT math (after a couple months of realizing butt in chair didn't mean something was getting done), but once she caught on she was good. They need that experience of knowing what it CAN feel like to work a more efficient way.

 

Believe me, I understand what you mean about the small chunks. Logically, it makes sense to me. He, however, seems to be like me in that he prefers working in large blocks. In fact, he has asked that for next year I set him up with a weekly syllabus for each class so that he can see the week at a glance and work on only one or two subjects a day. I'm going to do it and supervise heavily for the first month or two to see how it plays out, but he seems to think that he would prefer to work in large blocks rather than an hour of each subject every day. Perhaps he really WILL be more productive that way.

[PeterPan]

ElegantLion I think did some block work like that. You might search for her posts from a couple years back and see what you find. Transitions definitely can be an issue, so what you're saying makes sense. That's really interesting about his TT experience.

 

You can ask on the SN board. I *think* they say meds for the attention can help processing speed as well. There are some other things you can look into as well (neurofeedback, omega 3, etc.), but those help the focusing. Sometimes doing OT or just a sensory diet for that sensory stuff can help chill that part, allowing him to focus better. You might look at The Out of Sync Child Has Fun or stuff from Dianne Craft to see if anything makes sense for him. But all that, which is all GOOD stuff to do, is still not actually helping *processing speed.* Processing speed I think is because of the structure of the brain. The Eides, in Dyslexic Advantage, talk about the mini-columns being farther apart than in NT and how it takes longer to make the connections but that they make these amazing connections along the way as they bump around trying to get there. It was this lightbulb moment for me on why things could take so long and why a TT lesson that throws in discussion of King George's feet could make math facts stick better.

 

And yes, I'm concerned about this coming year, with the increased things you're supposed to be doing. My goal is (hopefully!) to knock out a couple things this summer and have us down to say 4 things in the fall. That will be much more manageable. I don't know what would happen if she did long blocks. I think at one time she talked about it, but she was young enough that I felt we weren't going to be able to manage it. We've never really tried it. It's interesting to ponder though. As you say, transitions are an issue. What I try do is clump things on her list, so all the things that involve the same type of work get done together. So then it functions as one block, even though it had several components. Haven't actually done a traditional block approach though, no.

 

So have you tried discussing with him? One of the accommodations, if the dc actually has a low processing speed, is to give them the discussion questions ahead of time. It's an accommodation they can be required to provide in *college* and any online, etc. classes he does now as well, another reason to consider evals. My dd requested this for an online class she did, and it made a big difference.

 

And yes, we ended up using the BJU World History for a similar reason as what you're describing with Streams. She liked it, liked the way the guy wrote, go figure. So I'm definitely with you on going with it when these preferences come out. :)

 

Uh, did I finally get it clear or did I make it sound like I thought you were guilty or causing this? You don't CAUSE this, and it has nothing to do with you. The things I was describing were possible accommodations (increased structure, clear expectations, decreasing transitions, discussion questions ahead of time, etc.). Whether meds can help as a side effect, I don't know. In general though, it just is what it is. The C8Kids site claims going through their program will help processing speed. Interactive Metronome can help. Since it's bothering him, evals would help him understand himself and help him be proactive about meeting his needs in the future.

[Hoot]

OhElizabeth,

 

What you wrote is excellent insight. Thanks so much. I'm going to look up those resources and do some research. I've worked as a para and a tutor in Spec. Ed. before, so I'm somewhat familiar with processing speed, accommodations, and such, but I really just hadn't thought about it for DS. We're definitely knocking out some things over the summer as well. I'm hoping that it will free up a little room to breathe during the school year. I also cut down on our co-op classes for next year so we're not so pressed to get everything done on someone else's timetable.