GAPeachie Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 I hear this often among homechoolers. That they have planning meetings with their children or accountability meetings and I'm curious what this looks like and how often you hold a meeting. We are struggling with accountability with one of our students, so I'm trying to make a plan... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lily_Grace Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 We try to meet at least monthly. Since we're doing unit studies this year, it'll be at the end of each unit. I get pastries, we make hot cocoa, and just sit and chat: -what have you liked the most this month? -the least? -okay, what are your suggestions for improvements? -Here's what I'm seeing......(good/bad, my frustrations) -Let's take your suggestion of X, and mine of Y, and see if we can make things a little different over the next month. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAPeachie Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 We try to meet at least monthly. Since we're doing unit studies this year, it'll be at the end of each unit. I get pastries, we make hot cocoa, and just sit and chat:-what have you liked the most this month? -the least? -okay, what are your suggestions for improvements? -Here's what I'm seeing......(good/bad, my frustrations) -Let's take your suggestion of X, and mine of Y, and see if we can make things a little different over the next month. How old is this student? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lily_Grace Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 We started them when he was 9, but since they're so informal and the conversation usually just flows, they probably could have been started earlier. 9 was just the age where we moved somewhere that had amazing donuts and we needed an excuse to eat. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianmumof5 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 We try to meet at least monthly. Since we're doing unit studies this year, it'll be at the end of each unit. I get pastries, we make hot cocoa, and just sit and chat:-what have you liked the most this month? -the least? -okay, what are your suggestions for improvements? -Here's what I'm seeing......(good/bad, my frustrations) -Let's take your suggestion of X, and mine of Y, and see if we can make things a little different over the next month. :iagree: We do something very similar here with the 2 older kids. OP - when you say accountability, what do you mean? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAPeachie Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 OP - when you say accountability, what do you mean? We are having trouble getting things done in a timely manner, with her best effort. No matter what we've tried it comes down to this and it is the same issue with chores. She will do them, sometimes okay, sometimes better than others but she will drag them out as long as possible. I'm ALL ears for suggestions. This is my child that tests my commitment to homeschooling on an hourly basis. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianmumof5 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 We are having trouble getting things done in a timely manner, with her best effort. No matter what we've tried it comes down to this and it is the same issue with chores. She will do them, sometimes okay, sometimes better than others but she will drag them out as long as possible. I'm ALL ears for suggestions. This is my child that tests my commitment to homeschooling on an hourly basis. ;) Your oldest? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lily_Grace Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 We are having trouble getting things done in a timely manner, with her best effort. No matter what we've tried it comes down to this and it is the same issue with chores. She will do them, sometimes okay, sometimes better than others but she will drag them out as long as possible. I'm ALL ears for suggestions. This is my child that tests my commitment to homeschooling on an hourly basis. ;) The best results I have ever gotten from my kid were not when I gave him a solution, but when I gave him the problem and told him to come up with a list of possible solutions. If I tell him to do it, that's one more thing to fight against. If I expect him to tell me, he gets to take responsibility and work on solving the issue first. We had a few years where it was 50/50 him trying something, and then me stepping in with putting in a more realistic plan, but he learned. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAPeachie Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 Your oldest? Yes, sorry! I should NOT attempt to multitask some days. LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAPeachie Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 The best results I have ever gotten from my kid were not when I gave him a solution, but when I gave him the problem and told him to come up with a list of possible solutions. If I tell him to do it, that's one more thing to fight against. If I expect him to tell me, he gets to take responsibility and work on solving the issue first. We had a few years where it was 50/50 him trying something, and then me stepping in with putting in a more realistic plan, but he learned. We've tried this and get a blank stare and an "I don't knowwwww..." *Sigh* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lang Syne Boardie Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 When your students are only 6 and 9, accountability is usually on Mom's shoulders. Sit with them through the entire school day. Teach, encourage, urge, remind, praise, correct. Bring snacks and drinks. Go outside for breaks. Stay very hands-on and involved until they both have internalized what homeschooling diligently feels like. Train them in your expectations by working through the day with them, every single day. Then begin to encourage independence by giving your 9yo one subject to be responsible for on her own. Teach her how to find her assignment and her materials, how to do the homework, and where to turn it in. Check on her the moment it is supposed to be done. Reward with mild praise, or impose consequences for failure, as needed. After she is accustomed to succeeding at independence in one subject, add another subject. And so on. The same goes for chores. You can't expect what you don't inspect while children are still in the training stage. Work beside your child on every single chore until you know for a fact she could do it in her sleep. Then work with her through most of it, but leave her to do a portion of it while you go do something else. Come back promptly, and again, respond according to how she did. Slowly add to the percentage done by herself alone, stopping to help whenever she hits a wall. Set her up for success by going slowly but insisting upon doing each baby step before requiring more. Baby steps. Incremental progress. Always modeling and sharing the work before expecting independence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CupOCoffee Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 (edited) For my student who sounds similar, I try to meet with her a few times a week. Once will be at the start of the week, to go over each day in the schedule -- especially if there is anything unusual on the schedule. I also try to touch base with her mid-week to see how it's going. I used to have to do this daily, because she would skip, do half jobs, and do sloppy jobs. We do not allow any "fun time" until school work is complete, and she learned quickly that if her friends were knocking on the door, or if she wanted to do ANYTHING, her work needed to be completed and I needed to be happy with the results. There have been stages where I realized I was asking too much, and I have eased off. If this is a HUGE problem, I would make time to meet with your student every day, when she says she's done. Go over things in detail, and tell her your expectations and explain how they were met or not met. You may have to do this for a few weeks/months and then ease off on the meetings as you see her improving. I had to make a specific "meet time" daily for mine; she KNEW that by that time, I was going to be checking up on her work and she would have to re-do or finish before she was allowed to have any time of her own. It only took a few times of telling her friends/having to re-do work for her to learn! EDIT: you answered on the age of your student while I was typing. My student who was like that is now 11 and doing much better; I agree with Tibbie, that at the age of yours, you need to be there every step of the way. When mine was that age, yes, I was "with" her through every step. That was the daily meets. Edited September 10, 2012 by CupOCoffee Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianmumof5 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Do you have a schedule? I mean, grammar at 11am, history at 2 pm. Do you have a checklist for each day's work so she knows what needs to be done in advance? I realize it is hard to stay on top of the oldest when really, they SHOULD be the one child who can be left alone a little more on things like schoolwork & chore; but sometimes you just have to be their shadow & be right beside them all.the.time. Trust me, my oldest is pushing my buttons since starting back. I've taken away every distraction in the last week - no wii, no iPod, no Lego and the hardest for him, no books!!!! Yes I took away all of his Alex Rider books that he just bought!! He has to sit where I can see him while he does his work and then show it to me as soon as it is done. We correct it together immediately & then he moves to the next subject. I give him a very specific amount of time for his chores and time him. I am basically watching him like a hawk and giving him zero flex. He is not happy but he knows why I am doing this. I have seen a huge improvement just today. Much better than last week. He will get one of his books back later this afternoon. I think it also helped that DH sat him down last week and had a good talk with him about being responsible, setting a good example, being thankful for what he has and showing respect for me. I am wiped out from having to be so on top of this kid, but if I didn't do this now......oh vey, we would be in huge trouble by Thanksgiving :glare: if you give him an inch, he will take a mile!!!! Hope that there was something in there that may prove to be helpful? :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GAPeachie Posted September 10, 2012 Author Share Posted September 10, 2012 I do sit with her (or have her sit with me) and it doesnt seem to be working long term. We do inspect.. but once she digs her heels in those corrections can take all day. Of course, I have three little guys, three and under, so can't sit in one place all day. *Sigh* Back to the drawing board. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CupOCoffee Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 I do sit with her (or have her sit with me) and it doesnt seem to be working long term. We do inspect.. but once she digs her heels in those corrections can take all day. Of course, I have three little guys, three and under, so can't sit in one place all day. *Sigh* Back to the drawing board. Is there something she looks forward to doing at the end of her school day? I would use that as reward for finishing in a timely manner and doing her work well. I understand you can't sit still in one place with the youngers to deal with as well. Do the youngers nap or rest? I would then concentrate working with her during that time. Figure out what is the most important work for her to do, and try to get that done every day, and done properly. It can be very painstaking to establish, I know. But it is so worth it in the end. Eventually it will get better. Again, is there something you can use as a reward for work well done? Screen time, a special game with Mom, helping Mom with something -- my Dd loves to help me cook -- she cannot if she still has corrections to her schoolwork to finish. Keep trying, you will find something that works. I know it's easy to get discouraged :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MerryAtHope Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 I have always done a daily tutoring time (or sometimes have broken that up into several meetings). For my high schooler, we meet weekly or as needed to discuss history. We will also meet occasionally to discuss goals, how a subject is going, curriculum choices for the next year and the like. For daily accountability for young children though, what I would suggest are workboxes. This lets the student know exactly what to do and organizes the books and supplies for that subject. For your 6 year-old, I would expect to work one on one with this child for most of the time. For a 9 year-old, I would expect frequent interaction to still be needed. If you are dealing with dawdling, there have been several great threads on that lately. HTH some! Merry :-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canadianmumof5 Posted September 10, 2012 Share Posted September 10, 2012 Something else we've done was doing work in the evening. DH watches the others and whoever has homework sits with me. DH usually goes to the park or plays road hockey so the kids are pretty unhappy to be stuck with me. That has worked a few times. Sometimes DD8 likes the one-on-one time with me so she will ask if we can leave a couple of things until after dinner. That works out well too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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