Scarlett Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 That happened to me too! lol. I had a HUGE crush for a LONG time. We went to prom together and a month later someone told me the truth about why he wasn't interested! :iagree::iagree: Being an ex doesn't necessarily imply that having contact later in life means you want to get IN to someone's marriage. I genuinely care about the people in my past and I was friends with them BEFORE we had relationships. :iagree: I never did understand the mentality that you get upset at the third party when the one responsible to YOU is your spouse. You seriously would not be upset at a woman who pursued and had sex with your dh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dustybug Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 You seriously would not be upset at a woman who pursued and had sex with your dh? I have been cheated on before, although I was not married to the offenders (but they were long term relationships)and no, I was never upset with the woman. She wasn't the one who made a commitment to me. The only instance where I think I would be upset with the woman is if it was a personal friend or family member of mine. THEN it would be personal for me because it was someone I trusted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 I have been cheated on before, although I was not married to the offenders (but they were long term relationships)and no, I was never upset with the woman. She wasn't the one who made a commitment to me. The only instance where I think I would be upset with the woman is if it was a personal friend or family member of mine. THEN it would be personal for me because it was someone I trusted. Well, I consider it similar to a theft. I would be upset if someone broke into my house and stole my jewelry. Even if insurance paid for it. And I had a cousin sleep with my XH. It was no more painful to me than the girl that I eventually divorced him over. She was an assailant in my life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbygirl Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Well, I hadn't ever looked them up, but after reading this thread I figured I to see what they're up to. I googled the name of the guy I had a mad crush on in 7th grade who I couldn't even speak to. Couldn't find him. I guess his name is too common?? I googled the guy I had a mad crush on in 9th grade who I couldn't even speak to and couldn't find him either. :confused: So I googled my first love and couldn't find him either. :tongue_smilie: Either I'm really bad at looking people up or I'm really not meant to know what they are up to. :p I'm only mildly curious anyway. I would never want to know more than a cursory, "so that's what they're up to these days" anyway. I'd never contact anybody though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ocelotmom Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 ((((ocelotmom)))) sorry. It's fine :) Everyone else is right - the marriage was already in trouble. The old boyfriend was just the catalyst. And I think that, overall, they're both happier apart. And it's definitely given me some immunity to grass is greener syndrome, especially since the second marriage didn't last. So many boys I had crushes on came out later on. I was quite clueless! There was this one boy I met when we were about 13, and for years I had a little crush on him. By the time we were 18 or so, I was starting to figure it out... I had that habit, too. Though it took me a while longer to catch on. Not cool at all!!! I googled a guy and came across a court document (in his town) convicting him of something with a child, now on the sex offender list. :( we broke up because he got a letter from somewhere accusing him of abuse with his neice. He cant read well, so i read him the letter, and he was very weird in his denial, and i left him. No more google for me. I totally accidentally stumbled across a link (possibly from here!) to a sex offender who I'm about 75% sure is the ex of one of my good high school friends. It wouldn't surprise any of us who knew him if it were true. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dustybug Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 Well, I consider it similar to a theft. I would be upset if someone broke into my house and stole my jewelry. Even if insurance paid for it. And I had a cousin sleep with my XH. It was no more painful to me than the girl that I eventually divorced him over. She was an assailant in my life. :grouphug: That is a horrible thing to go through and I'm sorry for your pain. I don't disagree with your feelings, it's just that mine are different. That doesn't mean I think yours are invalid at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted June 29, 2012 Share Posted June 29, 2012 :grouphug: That is a horrible thing to go through and I'm sorry for your pain. I don't disagree with your feelings, it's just that mine are different. That doesn't mean I think yours are invalid at all. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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