Some homeschooling related boundary issues, need ideas.

[dsmith]

This week has been especially difficult, with nieces and nephews here daily. That is fine. We live with my my in-laws and I certainly don't begrudge them time with their other grandchildren. The problem is that they are here more and more frequently and they just don't think that we are trying to get things done. Monday and Tuesday my niece was here, and she ended up by us after fil fell asleep. One day I can let it go and let them play for a while, as it's good for ds. He can't interact well with them when all three are here but does very well one on one. The next day I thought I would give him some time to play with her, but he was unable to concentrate on work after that. Today, my mil thought it would be ok to let my nephew play in ds's room while she is doing her hair. (that's an hour at least, lol) Well, the area we are doing school is right through his room and up a stairway. We can hear everything he does with ds's nerf guns and swords that make swishy noises.:lol: I have told my in-laws that they are a distraction, but this was the other day, and obviously it didn't register. My only idea is to put a stop sign on his door, and tell everyone that when the stop sign is up nobody comes in, but I already have a gate in front of that door. Any other ideas?

[rwjx2khsmj]

How old are the nieces and nephews? How helpful/supportive is your mil?

I think the stop sign is a great idea. A closed door should really be enough but since it's not I'd go for a specific visual reminder. I'd also have a talk with my mil about how important school is and how thankful you are that she's so supportive of your efforts. Then you can ask for her help in implementing the new system.

[Garga]

The swishy noises! I know all about those! While one ds is working with me, the other plays "quietly" and they don't know how noisy those swishy noises are.

 

I would be more formal in your approach about this and make sure your comments/requests aren't off the cuff. Sometimes people only half hear comments unless you grab their attention and make it formal.

 

Tell the adults "we school from x:00 to x:00 and cannot be disturbed, unless I have had a chance to review DS's work and know we have time for him to play. During that time, DS will need a quiet learning environment. We'll put up the signs for the children to know to keep away from our quiet area."

 

Tell the nieces and nephews what the signs mean and that the quiet time is important. And then reinforce it each time they forget and get too loud/close to where you're schooling. Kids need a few reminders before they realize you're serious about something. (And so do adults.)

 

That's what I would do. Very friendly, of course, but somewhat seriously as well.

[Farrar]

How long/often are they there? If it's two or three weeks out of the year or less, I'd just give in and take that off. If it's more often, closed door and a sign, I guess. It's tough - it's not really fair to them to have to be quiet and not play when they're having fun time at the grandparents, but it's not fair to you that you don't get a quiet space. Could you maybe see if they could do a morning movie or something so you get it a solid two hours, their fun time isn't being too dampened, and then let your ds spend time with his cousins after?

[MomatHWTK]

I would relax and let it go. Family isn't around forever, books will be. I don't think you'll get far telling the littles (niece and nephew) to be quiet anyway- they are stuck and bored, what are they going to do? Can you plan some group learning experiences, DVDs, etc. and not do your regular curricula until things calm down?