mytwomonkeys Posted March 3, 2012 Share Posted March 3, 2012 well, it is definitely ingrained deep inside of me to say, "may i speak to.." when calling someone. as a teenager, my father would not let anyone talk to me unless they asked properly. friend: is amy home? my father: sure! ......long awkward pause..... friend: ummm, is amy home? my father: sure! friend: may i speak to her please? father: oh! of course! i just thought you wanted to know if she was home. hold on just a minute and i'll get her! ...and if they ever asked, "can i speak to amy?"...he'd do the same spiel as above and say...."oh, i just thought you wanted to know if you could speak to her". so yes! we do not say "can i speak to...?" and we do not say "is yada yada home?", lol. always MAY i speak to... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mom0012 Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 I never use "May I" when speaking and I do not try to get my kids to, either. For me, it is just too formal. I never hear anyone speaking that way and it would just feel too intentional and forced if I tried to do it. It would not bother me if someone else said "May I", but since I never hear anyone do that, it would probably catch my attention. Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 well, it is definitely ingrained deep inside of me to say, "may i speak to.." when calling someone. as a teenager, my father would not let anyone talk to me unless they asked properly. friend: is amy home? my father: sure! ......long awkward pause..... friend: ummm, is amy home? my father: sure! friend: may i speak to her please? father: oh! of course! i just thought you wanted to know if she was home. hold on just a minute and i'll get her! ...and if they ever asked, "can i speak to amy?"...he'd do the same spiel as above and say...."oh, i just thought you wanted to know if you could speak to her". so yes! we do not say "can i speak to...?" and we do not say "is yada yada home?", lol. always MAY i speak to... :lol: I can imagine that conversation.... I really don't hear too many people mixing the two words... I wonder if it's somewhat regional, where the two are mixed up more, or rather, used interchangeably. I don't get why some people view "May" as the formal of "Can". I know my English teacher in high school would correct people for using them incorrectly but other than her, I don't remember others making it an issue, but again, I don't remember it happening often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Virg Posted March 4, 2012 Share Posted March 4, 2012 (edited) Yes, I do. I'm mean like that. "Can i", "will you", and "may i" just drive me nuts when used improperly. My parents made us use proper grammar all of the time. If I ever said, "Can I...," they would always reply with, "I don't know, can you?" Edited March 4, 2012 by ds4159 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cindergretta Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 : But I shan't use shan't unless I'm quoting Hayley Mills in The Parent Trap. "Shan't shan't, can't can't" :D "And I shan't tell my aunt about the ants, nor the debutantes!" :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elcmum Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 Yes, we try to be proper. DD will say, "Can I use your phone?" and I'll hold it up and say, "yes, you can" and wait for him to say, "may I use your phone." I think it goes back to reading a Baby Sitter Club book in the late 80s/early 90s. Claudia's older sister was a stickler for language, and I am pretty sure that's where I learned the difference between can and may. :) But, I digress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jjins Posted March 7, 2012 Share Posted March 7, 2012 I am a stickler about this also, always have been. As a young child my parents always were specific about can, may and will. During school, I picked up the slang of "can I" while meaning "may I". I was cured, through much taunting and teasing! :tongue_smilie: Now, my children use the words correctly. However, where it really causes me a problem is that I never say YES, I say "yes, you may." This is trained in HARD... I can barely, if at all stop myself. So, I have conversations with friends where they start with: Can I use your phone? Yes, you may. (handing the phone) Oh, I am sorry, I should have said, may I.... (blushing and embarrassed) My, mistake. I was not intending to correct you, I am VERY sorry. (also blushing and embarrassed!) The one my children are consistently corrected on is when to say "she and I" or "me and her". I even kindly correct their friends, who BTW are 9 or younger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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