What to wear to visit a monastery?

[MamaT]

My children and I are visiting a local monastery tomorrow. We are studying the middle ages this year. I found out there is an Orthodox Christian monastery in our area and called and made an appointment to visit.

 

I forgot to ask them what we should wear. We are not Orthodox and I surely don't want to offend them. Should I wear a skirt? Would the kids be okay in jeans? Any other tips or advice?

[milovany]

Do they have a website you can check? I know the two local Orthodox monasteries I'm familiar with have their dress code posted on their websites.

 

If not, I would suggest that girls wear skirts, long sleeves, closed-toe shoes and have a head covering available (any kind of scarf or bandana would work; just make a triangle and tie under the chin). For boys, nicer pants -- jeans are *okay* if you don't have any khakis or something like that -- and long sleeved shirts. This is how we dress when we go to the monastery.

 

Are you going for any services? Or just to be there and ask questions and look around? How fun! If you're going for any services, there might be things you ought not take part in as non-Orthodox, such as the Eucharist if you're going to a Divine Liturgy (well, come to think of it, at monasteries, they often have non-Orthodox leave after the Gospel reading, so be prepared for that -- the Eucharist is after that, so you wouldn't be in there anyway). If you have any questions about protocol and what you can/can't do, just ask. I always quietly ask a sister when I don't know something. As for "other advice" I would just say be respectful and quiet (don't let the kids run around rambunctiously -- that works for a day at the park, but not a day at the monastery ;)).

 

Let us know how it goes! We love going to the monastery for the day.

[MamaT]

Oh my goodness, I am glad I asked. I would never have thought of something to cover our heads or closed toe shoes.

 

Thank you!

[happygrrl]

Often monasteries have a website that has a "when you visit" section... that should outline the dress that they require. We went to a large one in AZ that had a bookstore where you would check in, and there they had extra clothing to borrow. Every Orthodox monastery I have visited has been full of kind and understanding people; I would just call them back! Some monasteries require that you not talk to the monks (except the one showing you around), while others encouraged lots of chatting. they will let you know.

 

There is also a lovely (brief) article you can read called "12 things I wish I knew before visiting an Orthodox Church" by Frederica Matthewes-Green that will explain some things you will see. My link isn't working so you will have to look it up, sorry!

 

I hope you enjoy your visit! I am very jealous! :D My times at the monastery were so peaceful, so inspiring.... I hope you get a little taste of that.

Have fun!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Below is a section from St.Anthony's visitors guide (as an example)

 

Proper Attire:

 

Visitors must be properly attired to enter the Monastery grounds. In general, clothing should be modest and loose-fitting, and include the following:

 

Orthodox Clergy must wear a Cassock (raso) in the Monastery and an outer cassock (exoraso) in the services.

Men must wear long pants and long-sleeved shirts

Women must wear long skirts, long-sleeved blouses, and scarves. (Please, no pants/slacks (unless worn under skirt), no tight-fitting clothing, no skirts with slits, hats, low-cut blouses, or sheer or small scarves)

Shoes/sandals must be worn with socks at all times. Please do not wear sheer stockings. Please wear practical and comfortable flat shoes while at the Monastery as it is desert terrain and the pathways are of rough flagstone. Please wear flat shoes— No high heels, platform shoes or open-toed sandals.

Pilgrims staying at the Monastery and all those attending church services must observe the order of the Monastery.

If you are not properly attired, please go directly to the Bookstore, where there is a limited supply of clothing for your use. In the guest houses, we ask that you remain properly dressed when outside your room, since the fathers often have need to enter the common areas.

[happygrrl]

OH, Milovany and I were writing at the same time. As usual! :)

[milovany]

I always quietly ask a sister when I don't know something.

 

Some monasteries require that you not talk to the monks (except the one showing you around), while others encouraged lots of chatting.

 

I didn't know this, thank you happygrrl!! Yes, our monastery is the chatty sort (although one would not approach Gerontissa (sp?) in such a manner), so I've had no problem asking questions of one of the sisters.

 

Tammy, yes, it's likely you'll be expected to wear head coverings, so I'm glad you asked too! :001_smile:

 

I had never even known there was such a thing as an Orthodox monastery before we were seriously considering converting, so my mind is trying to think what it would be like to visit one as a non-Orthodox person. I hope you have an enjoyable time -- and I'm sincere when I say come back to let me/us know what you thought.

 

Now, in our parish, we're preparing for a visit from the Bishop (this weekend, early next week) -- I need to start a thread about the appropriate protocol for that!! :lol:

[milovany]

Tammy, I just noticed your location -- WNC. Is that North Carolina? I wonder if you're going to the monastery our son was supposed to go to for camp this summer (it didn't work out in the end). I hope it's a lovely visit.

[lovetobehome]

Lovely! You already have the info you need, but I just wanted to chime in and agree that the experience is always so peaceful and beautiful for my family. I hope you enjoy it as much as we do! And, your post reminds me I need to plan for another visit. Enjoy!

[ZooRho]

This converstaion is reminding me of when my oldest was 4 we were in San Antonio, TX. We were at a bakery. There were 3 Priest from the Greek Orthodox Church there in Full dress. I didn't see them at first but my son saw them AND trying not to be obvious about STARING at them began to turn circles.

 

When all of a sudden HE totally cracked up, that is when I see what he is doing.

 

OH my. We went over and spoke to them they were the nicest guys. and What THEY did was as ds spun that last time THEY ALL 3 WAVED at the same time. It was hysterical. THey loved it.

 

We had a nice chat about what they were wearing and who they were.

[Anna]

No need to panic. If it can't be found on their website, just call the monastery and ask about their dress code. It could be different for each monastery. Fwiw-- When we first visited the one near us, we were told for the females to wear dresses or skirts and to bring a head covering to wear in the church. And no shorts, not even on the males.