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Question about family nights


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My daughters and I want to set aside one night a week as a family game or movie night. We started last night but I blew it when a neighbor and her daughter knocked on the door just to chat. We regularly have people stopping by without calling ahead of time. I don't usually mind but it is hard for me to turn people away when they are standing on my doorstep. We all had a fun evening but the children played separately while my friend and I talked. Not at all what I had planned.

 

If you have a family night, do you limited it just to your family or include others? Afterwards, I thought I should have asked if they wanted to join us in our game or come back another time. We have a game night every couple of weeks with elderly friends (70 yo daughter and her 90 yo mom) and have a great time. We always go there because it's easier for us to drive at night. My daughters look forward to participating. I guess I want to see adults and children interacting here in our home in the same way but I'm not sure if I want to limit it to just my girls and me as a special bonding time or include others. So how is family night handled in your home?

 

Thanks much.

Ann

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When we do a family night (once every month or so) we plan it out ahead of time, and it is just our immediate family only. DH calls his parents and I call mine before we start our activity so there are no interruptions, and then we let the machine pick up any other calls.

 

If you have people who regularly stop by, I would hang a sign on the door. You could have it say, "Family Night In Progress. Please Stop By Another Time," or something like that. You are entitled to uninterrupted time with just your kids. I know it makes my kids feel special that family night is set aside just for them with no interruptions from the outside world allowed.

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Our family night is family only. Usually Sundays are our family time and we send neighborhood kids away if they knock on our door. It would be really hard to send an adult away though. LOL! I would probably invite them in.

 

We also have neighbor time usually Friday nights. About once a month I make a taco bar and invite whoever is at our home to stay for dinner.

Edited by Ferdie
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We did family nights when my boys were little--wish I had kept them up.

It was just "us" time. With so many other people competing for my and my husband's time (esp his), my boys needed to know we felt they were just as special and deserving of our attention as others. It's really hard on some kids in ministry, who feel the need to compete with the dying, the heartbroken, the needy--they often learn to push down those feelings of wanting to be the focus of healthy attention in the name of helping others. We are very aware now of how that can show up later as resentment and distance.

Keep your family time just you, but do things for others as a family, too. Just don't substitute the latter for the former.

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We do family night on Thursdays. We have bible memory time and then bible reading. Then we do some kind of skit, whether it is for a new Bible memory verse or one that plays out how the kids can get along better. MOm and Dad do it the wrong way and the kids have to come up with the "right" way. We give out M&M's for participating! We have a separate movie night - Sundays. We just watched the Wizard of Oz last week.

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We have a weekly family night on Monday nights. Our church actually encourages this and we have a whole program called Family Home Evening (pm me if you want a link to ideas for this)...and church-wide this night is set apart without any church activities planned. We usually have an opening song (hymn or children's song about the Savior/gospel), prayer, scripture story, lesson (on something like sharing, obedience, citizenship, baptism, etc), activity (game based on the lesson or pictionary or charades, etc), and a treat. Sometimes we get together with another family for fellowshipping, or do a service project together or go bowling or something.

 

We use our answering machine. If someone knocked on our door during it, we'd answer the door and say, "Hey, we just started our family home evening, do you want to join us?"

 

It has been a great thing for our family--we love having a planned time set apart from everything else--to focus on each other and to focus on the important things we want to teach our children. The kids love it because we get to have treats!

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