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Question about kids in church (obviously cc)


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We are at a new church and they do not offer adult Sunday School. Adults go to the main service and the children have the choice of staying with their parents or going to Sunday School after the singing. I'm sooo torn about what to do. I like having my children with me for worship!! But with homeschooling and being at a new church, I can see where my 8yo DD attending Sunday School would give her a chance to make some new friends. Her best friend moved to Colorado this past summer and she is lonely. My 6yo DS would enjoy Sunday School and part of me would enjoy not having to keep him quiet during the service. BUT if I let them go to Sunday School, they'll never experience the main service. UUGHG! If we tough it out and keep the kids with us then in the fall they will have Awanas on Sunday nights?? (they are going to Awanas at our old church still on Wed. nights right now).

 

I want my kids with me in church but of course they are lured by the idea of fun and games and then I start feeling like maybe they are stuck with me all week and some social but still Biblically-based interaction might be good for them. Okay, so tell me what you think.

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I take it you are at a non-liturgical church? For some reason I'm remembering that--is your service basically music, prayers and (the longer, teaching type) sermon?

Ours are out for the first half then in for communion. (We have Eucharist every Sunday.)

Maybe you could have them go to Sunday school except when you have communion?

Or just maybe they could come with you once a month?

Would they really be worshipping, or would you be giving them something to do to keep quiet during the sermon?

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We go to a nondenominational church. Worship and then probably about a 35-40 minute sermon. Service is usually about an hour and fifteen minutes long. They do communion once a month.

 

At our old church they sat with us during service and then went to an hour of Sunday school afterwards (the adults had their own sunday school classes). So they are used to sitting with us but they are also used to going to SS. UUgh, it was my one "issue" with the church. But DH loves this church.

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We used to have SS through Kindergarten and I used to feel a bit torn, too, thinking they should be with us, but it would mean more to them to go to SS.

 

My kids are 9,9, and 10 and they have religious education on Wed. after school, so no more SS. We go to church together as a family now. Perhaps it won't be much longer and there will no longer be SS available to your kids when they get a bit older?

 

I can't imagine SS for kids forever-so hopefully it won't be much longer and they will be with you for good and you can worship as a family.

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What is keeping you at this church? I'm sorry, but dh & I could never attend a church where the Sunday School is during the main service. There are just too many churches out there now a days to not be able to find one that you line up with as far as what you want. We believe that children should be with parents during the entire service. That's just us though, I know this topic can be a heated debate. There is no write or wrong answer, each family has to do what is best for them.

 

Kristine

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Actually, there is only one church in town that we were able to find that had a separate Sunday School hour and we left that church after 12 years b/c they decided to go the seeker-sensitive route. The church we were in for the last year just decided to change up it's schedule and did away with SS hour. Every single church we've visited has 2 services and no Sunday School hour. This church (finally) lines up with what we theologically believe and isn't going the seeker-sensitive route BUT doesn't offer adult sunday school at all (they do small groups during the week).

 

It really is a pain in the rear. I get so sick and tired of this town. Dh and I are both preacher's kids and we just don't understand the mentality out here that church is something inconveniently stuck between trips to the grocery store and the movie theatre.

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Hi Daisy!!:)

 

Does the church offer more than 1 service? My husband and I help teach Sunday school during first service and our older kids have a Sunday School/Discipleship group during this time... and our youngest goes to first service Sunday school... 2nd service we are all in the same adult service.

 

We had the same dilemma and this was a wonderful solution. I hope you find a peaceful solution.

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Kristine, I agree with you. I really do. I guess DH doesn't much care one way or another. I'm feeling pressure from the church. You know, you walk through the door and they immediately start telling your children how great Sunday school is and then of course your kids want to go. I guess we need to set the boundaries now and not cave in to peer pressure. Seriously there isn't a family integrated church in this town. We have looked high and low.

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I have only recently started wanting my older children to attend the worship service with us. Until recently, they learned a lot more, and were much more attentive in Children's Church.

 

For our family, it depends on the maturity of the child, and how well they would understand the service. Somewhere around age 8, for us, is the breaking point. Until then, it is mainly an exercise in sitting still for a period of time.

 

I personally have clearer memories of what I learned in Children's church (possibly because of the visual aids/interactive nature?) than I remember about the teaching in the main service once I'd moved up.

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Well, we have family integrated church everyday. :) I don't have a problem either way, actually. Our church culture has always had SS during church. It is a blessing and we like it. The kids have age appropriate teaching and applications related to the stage of life they are in. The children have fun fellowshipping, doing Bible study, working on memory verses, and also doing hands-on activities. The adult sermon is in-depth, expositional, and full of Greek/Hebrew word studies that would a young child would not get much out of, imo. However, if families prefer to keep their children in during adult sermon, that is fine and up to them.

 

Do whatever you think best! I doubt anyone at church cares one way or another - totally your call.

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LOL. I talked to my Mom and she said I'm making too big a deal out of it. As usual, she is right. So I guess I'm going to relax and see what happens. Dh is the most laid back guy on the planet and the best Dad, so I'm going to let him handle it. Thanks girls.

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LOL. I talked to my Mom and she said I'm making too big a deal out of it. As usual, she is right. So I guess I'm going to relax and see what happens.
Of course your mom is right. I wish I'd been able to relax and see what happens more often during the first 50 years of my life. But I think I'm getting it perfected now, and the next 50 years should be much less stressful.
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We are at a new church and they do not offer adult Sunday School. Adults go to the main service and the children have the choice of staying with their parents or going to Sunday School after the singing. I'm sooo torn about what to do. I like having my children with me for worship!! But with homeschooling and being at a new church, I can see where my 8yo DD attending Sunday School would give her a chance to make some new friends. Her best friend moved to Colorado this past summer and she is lonely. My 6yo DS would enjoy Sunday School and part of me would enjoy not having to keep him quiet during the service. BUT if I let them go to Sunday School, they'll never experience the main service. UUGHG! If we tough it out and keep the kids with us then in the fall they will have Awanas on Sunday nights?? (they are going to Awanas at our old church still on Wed. nights right now).

 

I want my kids with me in church but of course they are lured by the idea of fun and games and then I start feeling like maybe they are stuck with me all week and some social but still Biblically-based interaction might be good for them. Okay, so tell me what you think.

 

You decide when the kids go to SS. They may love it or hate it. Start out with letting them go to SS every other Sunday. Usually the lessons are very simple. Talk to the teachers so they know what is going on. Get the worksheets or assignments for those Sundays the kids aren't in class.

 

I am not a huge SS fan but it does have its place. If you're teaching your kids about God at home, I see SS as being less important. If not, then it is more important. Regardless, having the kids in service is valuable, too. So you set the times they go and don't worry about it.

 

For what it's worth, I'm a pastor's wife and the head of our Christian Ed. committee.

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