I've had the subscription to consumer reports and done plenty of research. We are about to begin building. Of all the choices I had to make (for appliances) my frig choice was by far the hardest. I went to the higher end appliance business (thermador, dacor, wolf, Viking, jennair, etc) and for me I just didn't like the cabinet depth (built in) depth and didn't see how it would accommodate my larger items (trays etc). I looked at sears, lowes and 3 other businesses and examined the consumer reports ones up close. I didn't want the in door water ice dispenser. Long story short. I'm going with the whirlpool sidekicks where one is all frig and its partner is all freezer. www.appliancesconnection.com has better pics of them than whirlpool website should you be interested in looking at them. They're about $1350 each. Here's the link: http://www.appliancesconnection.com/images.php?pid=131503

Just more input on why folks like one vs. the other.

Can I throw this thread back out there for more input?

My friend's boys are 9 years apart and they clearly love one another. Oldest is protective and tolerant and loves the big brother shoes.

editing / deleting earlier post as no longer applicable since I ordered this book OhElizabeth suggested.😊

My grandma swore by buttermilk for any sick creature. how's she doing?

I too felt like you months ago when my son was at the pinnacle of the whining era; I couldn't believe that it had gotten to that point. I realized in our case that much of it was my being inconsistent and overly tolerant/ soft. My husband is PERFECTLY consistent, and, I noticed how differently my son (age 7) acted for my husband vs. me with regards to the whining/delaying obedience. So, I declared WAR on it. I seriously (no exaggeration) sent the internet modem (how we access internet) with my husband not to be brought home for a month, I turned off the phone ringers, I had a code for my family (let it ring once then call again 2 minutes later).....I removed as many “distractions†I could from around me as I knew I needed complete focus to turn this around. I began by apologizing to my son for having been too lenient and reminded him of the standards we had for obedience and that we were going to change this. That day we began the BEAN SYSTEM (explained below). Coupled with my being completely consistent, the system has helped turn this around for us. I'm sure that first week or two my son thought, "Is this my mom or a drill sargent?" as I let him by with NOTHING --- not a whine, not a subtle gesture, not a sloppily-made bed, not a moment's delay in obedience, I accepted NOTHING but sweet kind obedience. It only took like a week or so for him to get the NEW ORDER and, since then, things are going much more smoothly for all of us. Our BEAN SYSTEM: For every whine, delayed obedience, gesture/face expressing annoyance, etc......in short, for every act of defiance he gets a BEAN deposited into one of three jars. The 3 jars are labeled: "ALL THE WAY" "RIGHT AWAY" and "HAPPY HEART." [i borrowed these concepts from the Shepherding A Child's Heart book by Tripp where he writes that a child should learn to obey his parents all the way, right away and with a happy heart.] If my son doesn't obey me ALL THE WAY (meaning he partially does it or doesn't do his best) he gets a "bean deposit" into that jar. He gets a bean deposit in the RIGHT AWAY jar if he delays doing what we say. He gets a deposit in the HAPPY HEART jar for whining, complaining, gestures, rolled-eyed, stomping off, etc. When he sees or hears the clinking of the bean (the bean jars are in a prominent place in our home so he rarely isn't around the bean jars), he has to immediately go do copywork. For him, the amount is 10 lines per bean (the # of lines would depend of grade level of each child obviously). At the end of the day, the beans are counted and he also has to go to bed that many minutes earlier than bedtime for that night. The copywork is always in line with the offense but it's never short like, "I will obey." As an example, today I needed help in the chicken yard and it meant he had to go back inside and change his shoes (as he's not allowed to wear flip flops among the chicken poo). This bothered him so he let off the defiant gesture of the Woe-is-Me-angry-grunt-puff. After we had gone back in after finishing the chicken yard work, he had to recall the incident and tell me which jar the bean should go in. He said, "HAPPY HEART" and confessed why. Then he had to copy, "Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it."-Proverbs 3:27 ten times. (We had discussed what this verse means already as it's among frequently copied --- in this incident he was withholding HELPING ME). With my son being only 7, I think the visual aid of the jars helps him also. As for spankings, my son prefers spankings to copywork. He'd MUCH rather be spanked (and I don't give a milktoast spanking either). So the copywork, for him, is a highly effective punishment. (He has to re-do it if it’s sloppy). He usually ends up with about 2 to 4 beans per day (and there are the occasional days where he has gotten NO beans), but that's down from about 15 - 20ish beans a few months ago when we started this system. His habits are drastically changing for the better. When we first initiated it, I was concerned that he wouldn't get the heart change, but I’m seeing true heart change. What he copies convicts him as these truths are drilled in him. He will often come up to me afterwards and apologize on his own. We talk out the heart of the matter thoroughly and, for us, because we are Christians, we have an opportunity to tie it to our faith and our need for the work of the Lord in changing our hearts.