[Ideas for transitioning back from bio-parents visitation....rough night.]

They both want to. They have a good bond.

 

She is extremely difficult to parent (autism/DMDD) and he was raised by a mom with mental illness and addiction. He didn't have good role modeling to base his parenting on and his instinct is to use shame and over-punish to discourage bad behavior.

 

I want them to continue to see eachother, but only with therapy to help guide him in his parenting. The therapist agreed that it was an appropriate time to restart visits, and specifically wants them to occur on the weeks that she sees them ( he goes to therapy every other week visit). That way if there are any issues that come up, they can be talked about in therapy within a couple of days of them happening, not waiting 2 weeks to try to remember.

I understand. However, how do you balance the fact that in his learning curve, he still inflicts damage?

 

I am sorry I cannot offer any real solutions, as I have not walked this road, but I admire your care for this child and her father.

[oh gawd...talk me down]

Ugh!!

 

Does it make you feel any better that DS has to write an essay for his PE midterm?

 

It's like administrators want to make things more miserable...

Actually, more interdisciplinary.

 

Sorry, sparkly. I would feel like you do, it's a math class, just let me make my calculations and check out.

[Tunics]

This so true. I have found a pdf pattern company with a free tunic that I have sewed most of my winter wardrobe from this year.

Love notions is the company and The Laundry Day tee is the pattern in case anyone is interested. Quick sew and fits great.

 

( I lost 90 pounds this last year and emptied my closet several times)

Well done Katie!

 

And thanks for the pattern.

[Florida (beach) gulf coast vacation]

June. The gulf water takes a little while to warm up and you don't want to be around for spring break if you can help it.

 

My vote would be Destin, but not actually Destin. Drive a little farther east to Sandestin. But then, your girls might prefer to be in the middle of things.

[False missile warning in Hawaii]

Hang on, we'd be in Hawaii. Make that several Mai Tais instead of Pina Coladas. ;)

 

If nothing else, it's a good excuse to have them.

 

I have no idea how I'd have reacted TBH. It takes a lot to unnerve me. Considering we're talking nuclear we might have just pulled out chairs to sit on the beach and watch. If something nuclear really were to get set off by some idiot or another, ground zero isn't that bad of a spot to be (better than dying of radiation poisoning or nuclear winter). Whether the beach would have been ground zero or not would be impossible for minions to figure out though. So yeah, in retrospect, a Mai Tai or two would be enjoyed.

Mai Tais it is then! Cheers!

[Do you like salami type sausage?]

Oh, I once in a blue moon buy Genoa salami if I'm going to make a muffuletta. But that's rare.

[Do you like salami type sausage?]

Every now and then I like a bit of summer sausage on a charcuterie tray. But it is too easy to eat, despite how unhealthy it feels to eat it! So, I don't often buy it.

 

Not sure why it gets eaten more than the cheese, I like them in equal proportions.

[If you were interested in a pastry arts class for your middle schooler]

Very simple but versatile, profiteroles. Can be used for cream puffs or tea sandwiches. Maybe you could have a little contest or homework project with different creative ways to fill them.

[Spinoff: Things you love that everyone should own]

A Rat Zapper. I love these things. I have 2 and keep them loaded in the dungeon under this cabin. Whenever I get a mouse, I make a tally mark with a permanent marker on the top of the Zapper. I'm up in the 20's now on one of them. :) When I go down there to wash a load of clothes, and I see that light flashing, it just makes my day. lol I guess that's the city version of huntin'. ;)

I think your zapper needs a name, like Fury or the Memphis Belle.

[Spinoff: Things you love that everyone should own]

Oh, I need one of those belts! I feel like I could just wear it around the house too since I never have enough pockets.

Ok you might have put me over the edge with your brilliant idea to wear it around the house. I've had one in my amazon cart for months.

 

And, every time I see this thread title, the first thing that comes to mind is Qtips. Really.

[False missile warning in Hawaii]

It would take me several pina coladas to recover.

 

Seriously, terrifying.

[Romantic trip to Florida Keys during spring break... are we crazy?]

Not just spring break - cruise ships make Key West a port of call. Take a look at Islamorada or one of the other keys for a place to stay. You can always make a day trip to KW, or spend one night there (there really is a lot to see).

[20 something’s—typical]

Some of those thoughts may run through the mind of a typical young 20s person, but not the fixation and apparent jealousy of the younger sister that you have described in many threads over months (years?).

 

I'm sure it's difficult and demoralizing to listen to. If I were in this situation, I might just confront (that's too strong - maybe I mean "approach with confidence"?) and say something like, "I hear what you are saying. You've made your feelings clear. I think you may need to discuss these feelings with an actual counselor. When are you available for an appointment?"

 

Not sure how she would react, but it would be clear that you are no longer going to allow her to verbally beat you up.

 

ETA post high school graduate and living at home, complaining like that? Here it would result in an invitation to relocate.

[weather and mood]

The sun came out this afternoon and it is like a light switch flips in my mind. Life is worth living again.

That is pretty much what I experience.

[Committed Christian but not involved in church?]

Sometimes people need a break from organized religion, just to take a fresh grip on not being smug and judgmental - exactly the kind of thing Nemom was talking about. Get out of the bubble and reconnect with our neighbors and with our own beliefs...if Christianity (or any religion or ideology) interferes with basic humanity, we may be doing it wrong, so a step back is not the same as a step toward hell.

I concur. Church - as an organized institution, especially the somewhat independent American evangelical variety - can be very insulated. IME, teachings and attitudes can actually skew away from the grace that Christ Jesus demonstrates in the Bible (even though the word "grace" is commonly heard). Church in those days of its origin was much more organic than what we've made it into.

 

OP, I have had times of drift (and good reasons for such in witnessing abuse of authority), but honestly, I feel anchored when I'm part of a church or parachurch organization that offers regular opportunity for gathering together, worshipping together, learning together, serving together. It gives me a sense of more authenticity walking out my faith. That regular touchstone is important to me.

[weather and mood]

I am feeling it. Yes, one day of sun sandwiched between gloomy days really changes my outlook. I told dh we need to think about retiring in the keys. I am less daunted by the threat of hurricanes than by glum chilly days.

[E. coli in romaine lettuce]

I've also read that human waste in the fields from farm workers sometimes contaminates crops. :ack2:

I didn't think about that. Ick.

[E. coli in romaine lettuce]

I don't know what is the usual reason, but I would think that fecal matter on someone's hands that gets onto the lettuce during packaging or such would be one way.

 

Being too close to a feedlot or area where animal waste runoff is a problem. I think of commercial farming but I imagine under certain circumstances wildlife in an area could be a problem, as well as contamination at any part in the processing.

[E. coli in romaine lettuce]

Bumping this thread because I just read a new article about this topic:

 

https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/us/e-coli-outbreak-in-us-more-illnesses-reported/ar-BBIdPV4

These dates seem to indicate that we are past the affected window of time.

[Oh, please tell me how to handle this. I'm fuming!]

The people that don't check their email... I want to know if this is because they don't get on the computer much or because they just don't like to check it that often? I have a few accounts and don't check them all the same frequency, but I I know which ones are more important (ie. the one I use to sign up for crap at the store is not going to have my homeschool notices).

I find, "But I don't check/read emails" to be one of the lamest excuses ever invented. It's not that hard, truly.

 

ETA - I have already expressed what I'd do as the parent in this situation. As a volunteer leader, I would probably use two methods - fb groups and email (because personally I don't think it's all that hard to copy and paste). Phone calls and text messages would be reserved for on-the-ground, instant communications as needs arise (i.e., we are here in the crowd, standing by the flagpole; ran into road construction, be there in 15).

[Have you seen Hamilton?]

It goes deeper than just "whites need not apply". It's not the first Broadway show that requires actors of a specific ethnicity because of how it's written or what it says or what it stands for.

 

https://www.snopes.com/hamilton-non-white-casting-call/

Hairspray, anyone?

[HappyPAMama prayers and healing thoughts]

(((â¤ï¸)))

[Have you seen Hamilton?]

I am not the show's biggest fan, but it's art. I appreciate how it's increased interest ( especially of our youth and young adults) in the cultural arts. I am very curious to see what influence it will have on the future of musical theater.

[Do you think Oprah will really run for President?]

Someone pointed out that running for prez (for anyone, any party) means half the country will ruthlessly attack you and your popularity / public image is likely to suffer. In her case, that is a huge asset at risk. If I were her, I wouldn't risk it. Besides, I think she would hate the job.

 

But ... you never know.

Right now she has freedom to exert her influence and put her wealth (and rainmaking capabilities) to broad use. I imagine the office of the presidency would be...confining.

[totally petty (nail related) vent]

Honestly? I'd be alarmed at what the acrylic stuff is doing to weaken my natural nails. I'd go short for a few months and polish daily with a clear nail strengthener.

 

I don't like long nails for myself anymore. Mine have been clean-short-natural for years now, with clear coat only. I tried growing and polishing them at one point last year, but I had a flashback to my 1980s working girl days! I'm sure yours are lovely, but seriously, consider giving them some time off to get healthy, and the positive effect on the budget will be a nice bonus.

 

I'd keep the pedicures. My toes have all the fun with colors and special treatment. Maybe stretch out the time between brow waxes with a little plucking at home.