Go here: Pyromaniacs. The blog's writers are Calvinists (not Reformed). Some seriously good stuff there. One of the writers is John MacArthur's long-time editor (and an elder at Grace Comm'ty). They don't bend when it comes to Scripture, they come out hard against seeker and emerging church fads, and you can satisfy your urge to debate, even vicariously just by reading the comments. :001_smile:

:lol::lol::lol: Those ikky old Calvinists. Romans is one place where it's tough not to line up with Calvin without blacking out big chunks of text!

No offense taken here; I didn't think you came across flippant.

We use Net Nanny. DH is the computer guru around here; he set it up so I can't tell you much about the gory details. We set it to allow certain specific web addresses, and anything else gets a "blocked" message, which I can override by entering a password. It also has a time feature (won't allow Web use during hours we've blocked).

Well, it can be pretty generally accepted that to be Reformed, you adhere to Calvinism. All Calvinists are not necessarily Reformed, but all Reformed Christians are Calvinists. Calvinism is the set of beliefs that deals with how we are saved. Reformed theology embraces Calvinist soteriology, as well as a particular set of beliefs with respect to ecclesiology, eschatology, and baptism. Clear as mud? We keep ending up in this mud puddle...

Yes. So? Training up a child generally involves a lot of work by Mom till said child is what...25? 30? :001_smile:

(re why non-Calvinists may not know or understand what they believe) I'm takin' a stab here. A belief in the doctrines of Calvinism doesn't come over you the day you believe in Christ. An understanding of the nuances of Calvinism is usually the result of study and purposeful delving into the "how" of salvation. In my experience, there aren't a lot of Christians who get into reading the old dead guys who originally wrote about it, and there are a lot of Christians who get saved and don't go much deeper into the Word than memorizing some verses and listening to the pastor on Sunday. I'm not saying every Christian is that way, and I'm not saying every Christian who is that way is not a Calvinist. It's just a pretty generally observable trend that Calvinists tend to be folks who have studied a lot of doctrine.

No! Hips can be re-formed. It's an act of the will. :D

Reformed. You're predestined to eat it.

You'll have a cooler, right? wraps (slices of turkey, cooked chicken, or ham + cheese + lettuce rolled up in a tortilla or pita) apples (add cheese or peanut butter for protein) make your own trail mix, with nuts for protein popcorn Big Macs and jumbo fries :smilielol5:

Yep! Big football dorks here. Chiefs, Packers, Kansas State Wildcats and ASU Sun Devils.

I like your take on the lobsters, Emily. :) I live in Nevada, and my husband started calling me "Rabbit" when we were dating because I wrinkle my nose up when I grin. My license plate says "RABTMBL" and it's really appalling how many people think it is a reference to reproducing!

I don't let them fill up, for that reason. It's a small snack, plenty of water, and no candy or dessert stuff. :001_smile: Are you suggesting I should go inform M's mom?

I had a big ole reply typed out but the server was busy and now it's gone. Rather than trying again, I'll just say, that was some good food for thought! In a nutshell, DS (who is 7) gets concerned if I go around the corner of the aisle in the grocery store. He prefers to be where I can watch him and where he can come in and see that I'm still here. (Because Moms vanish sometimes, you know. Poof.) When HE is ready, yes - he deserves the freedom to learn his way around and enjoy the confidence that comes with it!

Okay, okay, people! ;) I am glad that the kids play here, where I can see and hear and know what's going on. I am happy to have the means to provide snacks when they want 'em. I do like this sweet little boy, who is actually 4 years older than ds but has a developmental delay of some kind which puts him emotionally more on a level with my young son. He's in a foster home, too - and truly I am pleased that our place is safe and happy for him to come and spend time. I'll quit my crabbing. I promise. Tanks for smackin' me upside the head. I needed it. Anybody have an ice pack and a glass of Merlot?

Awww, geesh, you're right. I am just being crabby. :sad:

Feel free to just tell me I'm being crabby. My husband tells me I can get that way sometimes. I don't see it, but... :D DS has a friend whom he plays with nearly every day, outside on our cul-de-sac. This kid (M) rides over on his bike from his house just down the street, rings our doorbell, and if we are done with school, DS goes out to play. Inevitably they get hot, thirsty, and hungry. Am I crabby to feel a bit taken advantage of here? DS always asks permission, but I end up giving both ds and M drinks and snacks. Not much - cheese sticks or crackers n peanut butter, a juice box, a bottle of water - but every pickin' day for the whole summer? I don't let DS go down the street to play because our cul-de-sac is safe from traffic and in my direct line of sight from the house to watch him. It would be really tacky to say, "sure, dear son, have a snack, and M, go home and get your own." Wouldn't it? :scared: Maybe I am just an old crab.

I wouldn't allow any reason for any rumors to be spoken. I wouldn't allow anyone to potentially rub my husband's nose in anything. I understand the allure, but there are almost no roads that lead to anything very good from here. Honor your husband. Start a women's shooting group and find a lady cop to teach you all.

You must go read this: http://purgatorio1.com/?p=128

:smilielol5:

I see what you're saying, Carol, and with both my kids still under 10, I can't agree or disagree with your assertion. :001_smile: However, I am convinced that God will not let His children slip through His fingers, not that we should tempt Him to do so by church-hopping and seeing how far He will reach! Seeker churches run the gamut from "we welcome visitors" (which isn't true Seeker, that's just being friendly) to "we chew it up for you, so you don't have to!" It really must be a case-by-case evaluation of the church and the family in question. But I will continue to assert that sound doctrine and sound teaching must trump the subjective stuff. He will strengthen that bruised reed and fan the smoldering wick into flame, especially when they are bathed in Truth and sincere worship in the midst of a body of true believers. :001_smile:

I grew up in a PCUSA church, so I have been exposed to reformed teaching since childhood. In college, I went to Baptist Student Union and attended a Christian (DOC) church, and lived fully to the gratification of my flesh, having no idea what denominational distinctives were. Within the last 4 years, I have studied and come to an understanding of what Calvinism is, what Reformed means, and while I am Calvinist in my soteriological beliefs, I've not taken on all the trappings of the reformed faith. Our church practices credobaptism, teaches dispensational eschatology, and is part of the Evangelical Free Church. Should I still be locked up? :D

If the children's faith is sincere, they'll only be aided in their faith by transferring to a church where there is true worship, kwim? As I said earlier, we left a seeker church, and our kids were heartbroken at first because the seeker church entertained them so mightily. But they both agree now, heartily, that our current church teaches the Word, and they prefer the meat. I just don't think the church itself is what will push them from faith or keep them in it - that's all the work of the Lord. :001_smile:

Melissa, I'm just looking at this from another angle. Bit o background: we left a seeker church for these exact reasons 3 years ago - not as deeply rooted in that congregation as you are in yours - but still a difficult and painful decision. We found a church where the Word is preached to us as a gathering of believers, and where the body seeks to honor and glorify God with our worship. The seeker model makes a wrong assumption at its foundation: that The Church is any gathering of people in a church building where they talk about God, regardless of whether the individual's faith is sincere or their walk obedient to His Word. This is not the body of Christ. The NT church was a gathering of believers, not a place where the curious came to hear messages designed to titillate the flesh and lure them into walking the aisle. Likewise, our church gatherings should be for the edification of believers; we should have elders/pastors teaching us the meat of the Word, encouraging us to grow up and hate our sin and grow in obedience to Christ. The seeker church is a gathering of potential believers, and if that is the case, there will never be an audience there which is prepared to move from milk to meat. It will always be serving Pablum. No wonder, when our eyes are opened to see, it is foul in our mouths. The reason you are discontent is because you see that this is not glorifying to God. Milque-toast worship, watery sermons, rejection of doctrine and avoidance of any exhortation to personal maturity and purity is the lukewarmness that Christ will spew from His mouth. We are to be presenting ourselves, holy and pure, as a living sacrifice, acceptable to God. Read Leviticus and see what He requires in His holy presence; it's not 7-11 "praise" songs and sermons based on Leave it to Beaver. Seek (no pun intended) a true church - a gathering of believers - where God is glorified in the worship, where His Word is the only foundation, and you won't be hungry for long. Choosing a church and becoming a member is not about how we feel when we leave church; it's about how we worship when we're there.

Curious how F feels about her new 'do. ? I agree with Joanne that L has chosen to return herself to a higher level of supervision than before the haircut. I also agree that some form of imposed consequence is in order, but not cutting L's hair off too. That just seems like a tit-for-tat reaction, and not instructive. I like the idea of working for some money with which to buy hair clips for F, but that will take some time and L might not connect all the dots. What about L helping F get pretty each day - with supervision - L needs to help F get dressed, or comb her new hairdo, something like that? Some kind of service for her sister's good. This seems more in the vein of fostering love for one another, rather than imposing something with an intent of making L feel bad.