DH and I agreed when we first started dating (23 years ago, LOL) that we wouldn't play games. So many people play games, and that's what your post screams out to me. You say you carried on with your normal routine (and that seems pretty late to come home on your anniversary if you were trying to communicate that you wanted to do something). You acknowledge that your attempt to do something for your anniversary was "half-assed." Then when he asked you about dinner, you told him you were not hungry hoping he would pick up on the fact that you were? That's a game. Don't play guessing games! Lovingly communicate—no assumptions, no codes, no passive aggressive hidden frustration. State what you want. Ask him what he wants to do. Take him out. I don't get the whole thing where wives feel the need to wait for their DH to make grand romantic gestures. Make a grand romantic gesture! You could try again with a honeymoon anniversary. That could be fun! :D

I'm all ears for more replies. Geography is a big favorite here. I will say that a subscription to The Economist has been a great investment for us in terms of current events and issues around the globe. Good fodder for debates at times too.

Hmmm. I don't know. She says herself about when they both got into the busy part of motherhood, "It would have been easy for me to let the friendship just slip into a yearly date on our birthdays and maybe a Christmas card. That was my typical MO with old girlfriends." Sounds like she is not so innocent herself. She was just on the hurting end of this particular friendship ending. I had a very close friend when our kids were little and we did the drifting away thing. First of all, we never lived near each other after our kids were toddlers, then weekly phone calls dwindled to monthly then to quarterly when we got really busy. Imagine my surprise to get a very similar message one day—what had she done, why didn't I call, etc. I assumed it was completely mutual drifting and was taken aback. Honestly it made me feel attacked and just odd about continuing any kind of friendship at all. I bet a kazillion dollars there is another side to this story.

I hate to ask the obvious, but what does she say? She sounds just like my DD. Hard to plan for in that way. Very picky and knows herself well, very self-assured...in a good way that will serve her well when she is an adult (I keep reminding myself :lol: ). Is she a strong reader or no? Maybe instead of you reading history and science to/with her during your morning time, you could assign her that reading for the afternoon and spend the time with her doing hands-on science? I've found I don't have to do so much as supervise and facilitate. I like Esse Quam Videri's wildlife photography ideas. I would take her to Barnes and Noble, have her "look inside" on Amazon, etc. I would have her look at curriculum samples to see if anything in particular floats her boat. Sounds like a big geography study with lots of highly visual resources would be great for her. Go to the travel guide section of your library. Seriously! Seriously underutilized resource!!! Honestly, I never found a geography that was exciting enough and hands-on enough for us. Geography can be super fun! Below I'm going to quote some old posts of mine about the geography study we did. I'm wondering if she might like something like that if you propose it to her...or lead her to proposing it to herself. LOL You can figure out a way to include photography, maybe regular trips to the zoo /and or nature areas nearby? So we did this, and modified it a bit because my kids love any and all imaginative play. OK, that's my idea. And I've totally messed up the formatting here, but I have to go so I'm leaving it. :tongue_smilie:

I think these are great points. We don't schoolize all hobbies here either. Some things they do want left alone and others they want considered part of their school day...more like they realize there is educational validity to it and so it should take hours away from other subjects they are doing in school. LOL If that makes sense. The plans we are making right now are for long-term loves. It seems funny in a way to play so far out, but these particular interest aren't going anywhere. It's such a big part of who they are. I read your first sentence and thought a hat box! They're fabulous. :lol: I think your refrigerator box metaphor is perfect though! I have always thought choosing your own books, spines and supplements, was a huge part of personalizing the homeschool experience. The older my kids get, the more I see it is just as big a privilege in the older years as in the early years. I think geography is a great subject to work on together! I've had to move away from a lot of shared group content, but that's one I still keep my kids together for most of. Very, very jealous of your trip to Britain!

At 12, if you needed to find oldest DS, you were sure to find him standing in front of the fridge with both doors open, staring into it like a lion preys on a gazelle. He's there now...hunting.

I agree! I think SWB says something similar. Something about tears and learning don't happen at the same time. I have a genuine belief that it would be easier for me to prepare my kids for college than for high school. Weird but true.

That's the way here too. The kids love when I work with them side by side.

Thanks so much for the links. They are fantastic!

It's true! I can't tell you how many times I have been confounded looking for requested resources for methods and finding only recipe books for art, music, crafts, etc. My kids want info and techniques that they can use in their own way. They don't want to produce something from start to finish by following instructions. I will say DD has reached a place where she realized that her skills were starting to be limited by her knowledge of specific techniques, so she chose to do sequential lessons. However, she still puts her own spin on it. She will do the lesson as taught, then she uses what she just learned in a project of her own design. When she started with The Virtual Instructor, she did the first acrylic lesson on value and light/shadows, painting a cube. Then she used the skills gained to paint her cat in grayscale.

I agree with everything. Love your kids' self-starting! The bolded is exactly it for me too, more so now than ever. All of the afternoon project, out of the box studies were the kids' ideas, not mine. There is so much value in being able to pursue your own interests (although I will admit a HUGE part of the timing of this is me wishing to woo my kids into choosing to homeschool for high school).

OK, I have some fun ideas churning! I will post after school.

The dreams are fun, aren't they? For your DD2, I will recommend Adobe Creative Cloud apps. There are tutorials for most of them and DD has learned to do her own formatting. She is affronted when I correct it. LOL Checking all of this out... I am DEFINITELY going to do the C&H study, maybe with DS9. Thanks! And I had (have?!) the Sonlight formatting affliction as well. I like order. It gives me something to rebel against. :lol: Oh DD would love all the crafts classes. I really need to look more into outside classes. I feel like a short-timer here though. :(

Once again I think of what good friends our kids would be! My older DS and DD have similar interests to your older two. (DD recommends the Butter cookbooks for baking. Ridiculously decadent and amazing!) I completely agree about outdoor time. When my kids seem out of sorts, the first fix is to get outside. It is healing. And water. Whenever we can be near water, we take the opportunity. I am awed by your hobby of aerial silks. I am a big ol' chicken! I'm more of a reader, quilter, cook...ground-based hobbies! ;)

Interesting! This post together with Lisa's post below... ...makes me think! DS13 is the one who loves more order and a schedule. I think DD would really benefit from a mix of Janeway's and Lisa's 6th graders' expectations/freedom. I give her a daily checklist, but she would probably be much more inspired by a weekly schedule and the control over her own ability to open up swaths of time! Those dream years are lovely! I can't let it all go either. But honestly, I don't think I should. I think kids need balance. I want my kids to leave our homeschool with strong math, reading, writing, and speaking skills. I want them to get cultural references and to have a basic understanding of important ideas in history, science, and current events. AND I want them to be passionate pursuers of their own individual interests.

Gotta go get DH. Back later!

That is awesome! I love that feeling! And "the least I've ever planned" has a very attractive ring to it! For real! That's how I feel about our traditional mornings this year, and the "planning" for their projects is just plain fun! Fun book! What they want is not what I want. True.

Sorry about the enormous multi quoting! I'm going to run out of response time! And my migraine finally went away too... I am definitely going to look into this! Thanks! So jealous. We've moved twice since we did some major gardening in the home we own and lived in 7 years. I dream of a homestead, urban or otherwise. Oh, I still have almost all of my crutches in cabinets. Luckily, I have several bookshelves with cabinet door bottoms to hide my backup plans. :lol: I wish we could find a mentor. We are going to be moving again in about 6 months, and we don't even know where. Eeeeek. Yes to taking time. All the things my kids dream about doing take tons of time! DH has an old classic car that they were working on rebuilding, but it's in storage now. I dream of the day we can take it out of storage again and make it the biggest best project ever! Such learning in old-fashioned mechanics! And yes, DD will help too. Her nickname is Princess Tomboy. ;) DS13 has books and tools for bicycle repair and fixes bikes for the neighborhood kids. No charge though. He's just proud. That sounds fantastic. This is how I always dream summers will be too, and they kind of sort of are, but with too many video games and friends clamoring about. I long for a productive low hum...or better yet, productive silence. :lol:

I'm glad about the bolded, especially because when I posted my plans on this thread, I still can't help but notice that our mornings are still pretty traditional. :lol: Your days sound amazing! What truly lovely ideas you have! And yeah, it's ok if it doesn't happen as often as we'd like. At least we make it happen at all. :) I absolutely can't imagine schooling with a little one. Next year, my kids will all be in double digits, 10, 12, and 13. That definitely makes this easier. You know, I did a purposeful study of this with DS13 a while back, and we continue it even now. I will sometimes just put on his checklist now, "See Mom." Then he comes to me about whatever it is and we do a little mini-lesson in something important. 25% again, I guess. :) I would love that career! It would be perfect for me! Unfortunately, I doubt it would pay well. :D I will think on yours and on Rose's DD and respond back later. DH is going to text me any minute to pick him up after having been gone a week, so I'm going to run out of response time for a while...

Oh my gosh! I had to look that up and I'm so glad I did. How cool is that?!?! Very cool! But the edible weeds study is cool too...not to mention potentially life-saving if lost in the wild. :D

I am loving all of the responses! I was kind of afraid this thread would end up with crickets chirping. :) Unfortunately, I woke to a sleety day with the beginnings of a migraine and had to drive out to get fasting blood drawn. By the time I was back home, it was (is still) a full on migraine and I'm extremely light/screen sensitive. I just wanted to post to say keep posting! I will be back when the screen doesn't make me want to hurl. ;)

Nice. And it's stuff like this—the strewing, the rich environment I work hard to provide—that makes me feel like I should be able to relax more. Half of what they know I can't figure out how they learned anyway. They are starting to teach themselves so much. I really like your Important Unschooly Fun Stuff! Especially the stuff in jammies. :D Overall, I think it's a great balance.

Maybe the depth thing is part of it for me. This year I'm seeing DD start to blossom and take ownership of this learning. DS13 has made enormous strides in personal responsibility and gets his work done, taking it seriously, many times even joyfully. DS9 has always been a depth guy. He was born a 40 year old in a newborn body. LOL The German immersion sounds incredible. For five minutes last month we thought we might be moving back to Germany this year. I spent too much of that 5 minutes on Duolingo and then got frustrated we weren't going back. :lol: It's a gift you gave your kids though! So cool! Those puzzles hurt my head. :lol: They're great though. I so hear you on finishing the books on the shelves. Never going to happen here. :( I too struggle with what we'll never do. And don't edit. I put it here hoping it would get the most looks. The kids are all going to end up older later anyway. :tongue_smilie:

My oldest DS is doing OM Geography this year and loved it so much he asked for their bio next year. I'm planning on using a few other things if they stick around for high school. I really like the vibe of the curriculum. A couple of years ago I looked at the younger grades (4th and up anyway) seriously, but at the time I combined my kids so much that it wouldn't work for me. I loved it though. Just absolutely loved it. Cryptography is cool! And guitar is the best. I'm still trying to convince DH to get the kids to form a band. :lol:

I really like this. Very cool idea for your rhythm! Maybe an elective? I know how you feel. I sense my time is slipping away now. But even still, my morning core listings are very traditional.