T'smom
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Posts posted by T'smom
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Agreed she does have a choice while others don't, but I don't have a choice whether or not to stay at home either... because I can't earn enough to be able to afford to work.
If I were working full time in my pre-children (graduate) job, I'd be paying 120% of my take-home for childcare. So whether I want to or not, I'm at home; working part or full time outside the home would be a net drain on our resources, and we *can't* afford that.
We're in the same boat- I'd probably make a little money, but not much. I wonder why this isn't the situation for more people. Considering the higher income bracket we'd be in + childcare.....we wouldn't be very much ahead.
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I didn't know about any of the Romney/Rosen stuff this morning when I told dh I really wish I didn't have to work b/c I'm too busy with "real" work. I consider myself a feminist and it really boils my blood that my choices are not considered valid.
:iagree::iagree:I consider myself a feminist too and I'm a SAHM. I'm also NOT a conservative.
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double post.....sorry
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Hm. I guess people are different, but I have never encountered an angry depressive. It almost seems incompatible with depression.
I know what you mean- when I get depressed I don't have the energy to get mad. However, some people do go into a rage. I have several bi-polar people in my family.
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I'm LOVING the muffin suggestion. Especially since I could just say I made a bunch and had extras to share!!! I very rarely make muffins, but I guess this is as good a time to start as any.
I thought about a fruit salad- but sliced fruit gets brown so quickly....maybe I'll just throw in some apples/bananas/oranges. Anybody have any good, easy, won't-get-brown fast fruit salad ideas?
Thanks everybody!
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I'm taking a meal to someone from church and I'm planning on enchiladas. I will also take corn and salad and someone else is doing dessert. What is another good side to go along with enchiladas? They have 6 kids, (I am not used to cooking for so many) so I'm planning on 2 9x13 pans of enchiladas. The family is in kindof a rough spot and I'd really like this meal to stretch as far as possible (having a few left over for lunch the next day) I don't really want to do rice or beans....I think they have a lot of that anyway.... ideas?
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The bolded is simply not true. :glare: The APA recommends "continuation of breastfeeding for 1 year or longer as mutually desired by mother and infant."
Well, that's the way she said it to me. I think that's what she was trying to get at by saying "It's okay as long as it's okay with you and with her" She must've said that phrase 5 times. She WAS very kind and I did not want to offend her, so I didn't really say anything except that I was fine with what we were doing. There were several times when she said "Well, such-and-such is okay with me" and in my head I was "Oh, good. I'm so glad I have your permission." But she was so nice and smiley and positive that I didn't want to be snarky with her. I just smiled and nodded.
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I took my 20 month old dd for her 18 month check-up yesterday (I'm sooo bad about getting check-ups done on time!) Anyway, the doc was asking about when she switched from formula to milk and I said "well, she was never on formula, she still nurses a couple times a day, but she does drink reg. milk too." The doc was tried so hard to reassure me that it was all okay. She told me several times that there was nothing harmful in my breastmilk and although the APA didn't recommend going past a year there was really nothing wrong with it as long as it was okay with me and okay with my dd. I thought it was so funny because I had not asked if it was okay or acted uncertain about my parenting decisions in ANY way. And really? Nothing harmful?!?? Did she think I was worried about my milk going bad or something?!?!? As long as it's okay with my dd?!?!? Does she think I'm holding her down and shoving my bre@st in her mouth?!?!? It was weird.
I just smiled and nodded through the whole thing because the doc was very kind. I just thought it was rather funny.
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:grouphug:I gotta tell you, my hardest little kid has been my easiest teen. I think we got all our angst worked out when she was little. Honestly, she has been an absolute angel of a teenager. It is truly almost unbelievable.:grouphug:
Thank you for the hope. It's been a long few days and the idea that it gets worse almost has me in tears. I pray that this is true for us.
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That's such a great idea! The only thing that comes to mind right away would be burritos. Ooh, or soup in little individual containers. OR- freeze the soup in little containers, then pop them out and put them in a bag, (like with baby food frozen in ice cube trays) so your containers aren't tied up in the freezer.
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Your oldest is 5, according to your avatar.
Mine were perfect then too, most of the time. They listened to me, definitely.
If you can still say this in 10 years, I will be in awe.
Teens really do seem to have a parent-filter that filters out every wise thing we say but when someone else says it, wow...it's a revelation.
So annoying.
Are you kidding? Your kids were perfect at age 5?!?!? I know tone is hard to convey on the internet- but I'm seriously asking. Because it would be physically impossible for my 4.5 yo son to argue with me more than he does now. If it's going to get worse than this- forget sending him to school, he's going to boarding school. He doesn't have much experience with other authority figures, so I have no idea really how it compares to them- but he fights/argues/questions me on every.single.thing. every.single.day. Today we went to an activity at church and I took a different route to avoid some road construction and he questioned me relentlessly. Y'know how people will say something along the lines of "You just have to keep putting them in time-out so they learn to stay there? It might take 30 times?" Uh, no. With him it took 300 times. But it's not just that- it's every.single.thing. I try to let him choose what clothes to wear, but he WILL try to wear something completely inappropriate like shorts when it's 30 degrees out. He fights over decision- we'll have 10 separate arguments just over getting dressed. And I'm not being unreasonable. He wants to wear rainboots? Fine. He wants to wear clashing colors? Who cares? But he does have to wear weather appropriate clothes, so we fight over socks/no socks, shorts/pants, short-sleeved/long-sleeved, jacket/coat. And food? Forget it- he'll starve himself before he eats something he doesn't want to. On Monday, he'll LOVE PB&J, on Tues. he'll refuse to eat it. Last night, he was asking me what day came after Sunday- so we talked about the days of the week (which is fairly familiar with) and he said "no, that's not all of them- we didn't say 'tomorrow'." I explained the concept of 'tomorrow' patiently about 5 times, then I just said we weren't discussing it anymore and he was literally screaming over it because he was so sure that I was wrong. Yesterday, on the way home from G-mas, he wanted to know how to get there. So we discussed the different towns that we drive through. He said "No, we have to go through X" "No, honey, that's in the other direction. If we went to X we would be going away from G-mas" He screamed about that- insisting that dh and I were way off base. I don't know how many times a day I say "We're not talking about this anymore" and he throws the biggest fits about it.
I'm so sorry. I know that this is way long and way off topic, but really, if you -or anyone- have any advice, I'd love to hear it. It just *can't* get any worse. It just can't.
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Cadbury Mini Eggs!!!!
They're my vice. I'm so glad they're not available all year... (this year, Walmart even had this enormous bag with a ziploc type top and everything. :svengo: )
I did get some in the weeks leading up to easter. Today, all the candy was for the kids. :)
Loving those Mini Eggs! I bought a huge bag at Sams and I'm hiding them just for me!!!!
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He is risen, indeed!
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Thanks.
It appears that I'm just that boring. I can't think of anything to pin.
Oh, that's the problem! You don't know what you want to pin until you see it! Y'know how you go shopping and browse and something jumps out of you and you just know you can't live without it? That's what pinterest is about! You get to look at all these cool things that you never even knew about! I'm not talking about coveting things or wishing you had someone else's life.....it's like looking at a magazine and seeing a cool craft project or organizing idea. For example.....did you know that you can make glow-in-the-dark bubbles by breaking a glow stick into the bubble solution? Or make a huge "sensory bag" by folding plastic sheeting in half and taping the sides and filling it with water? Just a couple of ideas I can't wait to try!
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When I was in high school and college, playing with kids (babysitting, being a scout leader, etc.) was a fun break from life. Now it IS my life. I don't have the energy to bump it up a notch for other kids, and the novelty has definitely worn off!
This is it exactly! I know I was more fun before I was a mom. I just give so much to my own kids that I don't have anything left over for that type of thing.
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I think it means the sweetheart you had while you were in high school. I wouldn't think it matters where they went to school or even that they graduated the same year.
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I'm in the same boat, but I have a 4 yo. His behavior is sooooo much better when we have been ACTIVE- and I am NOT talking about a walk around the block. I'm talking hiking, running crazy at the playground, all day at the beach or pool, etc. A crazy amount. Crazy. And we live in Michigan and most of the time, it's too darn cold outside for me. But if we don't do it, he is literally climbing the walls by 4 or 5. Activities for his age just aren't active enough. He does gymnastics once a week, but it's only 45 minutes and while they do a good job keeping them busy the whole time- it doesn't even phase him. To do anything like swimming would require at least a 25 minute drive......
I don't think he's ADD though, he is very able to focus on lessons (in fact asks for them most days) loves to color, read, etc. He can sit still for long periods of time. But he is a different kid when he's been seriously active. I've been trying to figure out how to work this into our day.....but I haven't figured it out yet. I'm :bigear: on this thread!
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You would think that this would be an easy question to answer.....but I'm stumped. My mom stayed home most of my childhood and we were comfortable- but my parents do talk about not being very comfortable before I came along. My mom also worked full-time to put my dad through grad school. One grandmother was a teacher, the other a journalist. The teacher worked through most of my mom's childhood, the journalist not until my dad was mostly grown. They would describe themselves as being poor "back then" but I don't think they were worse off than the majority of the population. My grandparents are very well-off now- they have plenty of money to lend to family and occasionally do things like buy cars for people. My grandmother started her teaching career in a one-room schoolhouse and her mom taught in one too! (There are actually 4 generations of women that got teaching degrees at the same university!)
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But she was talking about life when they were all grown up... how can running a household for two people possibly fill a day?
Even with teenagers, I do not find that my household even remotely occupies my time... what does one DO all day? (I don't have a homestead where i have to carry water from the creek, chop firewood, kill and preserve my own food. I have tap water, gas heating and a supermarket.)
Just to clarify: to me, it is NOT about the money. It is about spending life time in a meaningful way. If the mother stays home to write a novel or paint, that's perfectly fine. My point is about doing something. About having a passion - for a job, or for a volunteer cause, or for a hobby. I consider it very important to model this for my children.
That is not the way I interpreted it. She talked of "setting an example"- by the time a kid is mid-teens, I think the example-setting time is over. Kids absorb internal messages when they're younger than that. I thought she was musing about if she already had/hadn't set a good example for them.
I said that sitting poolside while other people waited on you was setting a bad example. I believe that it is. I also believe that waiting on your kids hand and foot is a bad idea. Kids need to see mom as a person with interests/ideas/value and they do NOT need to think that bringing in income is the only valuable contribution.
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But see, I think this is one of the problems. (Not speaking to anyone specific except my own experiences.)
A teenager should not see their mother doing little else than bringing them food and cleaning up after everyone. That is bad for multiple reasons, I think. Like I said, I grew up in that environment, and I think it hurt me in many ways.
Now, that is true and a very good point. I was trying to make the point that only work done for money is valuable. I agree that a mother should not be waiting on her children- she should be preparing her children to be independent. (which is actually a LOT more work than just doing it for them!) My mom only worked part-time when I was a teenager and not at all when I was little- but she never waited on me a day in my life!
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I'm not necessarily young earth, but I'm not NOT-young earth either. I absolutely believe that every word the bible says is Truth. BUT I think that there is more to it than we have the capacity to comprehend....kindof like how we can understand "forever" but we can't truly grasp eternity. I also believe that we're supposed to believe on faith, not because we can prove something scientifically. But I also believe that we'll never be able to disprove God either......
I'm curious as to why you feel you have to make a choice. Whether I'm YE or not doesn't influence my daily life at all. It doesn't change how I behave or anything.
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To be honest: yes, I think it is setting a bad example for daughters.
I want my DD to see me work, and I want her to grow up with the idea ingrained that women can support themselves without being dependent on a well-to-do husband.
I understand staying home with little kids, and I even understand staying home while homeschooling older kids - but I never got my MIL who never returned to work or found another worthwhile occupation (volunteering, or being an artist, or something) after her kids had grown up.
I do expect my children to start at a lower standard of living than I have now in my 40s. I did it myself. As a student, I had very limited means. As a graduate student, only slightly better. But I do not recall ever regretting it - I still remember reveling in the freedom and independence, being thrilled by having my own small ratty apartment because I was finally an adult and no longer living with my parents.
DD is already chomping at the bit to move out and can hardly wait; I know that for her the new freedom will be more important than the higher lifestyle she could have staying at home. And I think that THIS is something where I, as a parent, can help: by not making material wealth the center of our lives.
I disagree. I do NOT think you are setting a poor example for your children. Unless you have multiple maids to clean up after everyone, cooks to fix all your meals and someone bringing those meals to you while you work on your tan poolside.....
There are many things that need to be contributed to running a household- money is just one of those things. I'm sure that your kids see you making meaningful contributions to your family life.
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I wear mine all the time, except for the last couple of months of pregnancy when my fingers were as fat as sausages. (I have this thing about not being able to take my rings off- if I can't get them off I freak out so I remove them before that point!). Dh lost his within a week of the wedding. A couple months later, he got another one and that one lasted 3 weeks. I think he's on his 4th or 5th now and finally he's gone 6 months or so with the same ring!!!! Every time he lost it, it took him longer and longer to get it replaced- so the majority of our marriage he hasn't worn one.
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Dh is an athletic trainer. He works in an industrial setting, taking care of on-the-job injuries. He has his Masters.
Anyone on here have a fitbit?
in General Education Discussion Board
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I did, but it went through the washer last week! I liked it a lot, but not enough to replace it.