I totally agree, from my very limited experience, that driving in MA is a standard deviation worse than anywhere else in New England. In Colorado, like I mentioned earlier, everyone stays on the right except to pass. In theory they do this in MA too, except everyone is trying to pass all the time so they spend the entire time on the left or switching between lanes. Like in the space of 3 miles they might switch lanes 7 times. And they get right up behind you going 65, which is annoying. After we went through MA into NH, DH and I both resolved not to drive in MA again. Like, ever. In VT so far they are slooooooow especially on the mountain but at least they're not aggressive AND slow AND entitled.

My kids eat a lot of food. They just eat a lot. A bag of apples lasts a day.

We had a Joovy sit-n-stand for a long time and really liked it. I think I got it used on craigslist for like $70. I was using it with a sitting-age baby and a preschooler, though, so it might be a bit old for your needs. Have you considered a carrier (like an SSC) and a single stroller?

we have 9 (one is a newborn) and we spend more on groceries than I'd like to admit. Just... at least $3k. But I doubt we spend $100 on gas. We work from home. We also don't eat out but maybe once every two months. Maybe.

I rely on those simple interactions a lot too, I think - or rather, they have an effect on me which is cumulative. Sigh. Hopefully I will either get used to it or luck into a local pocket of friendliness or something. Or move back to Colorado in a year.

Wow, that is a massive amount of gas! I'd also look at getting a smaller car or two smaller cars if you're doing that much solo driving. 55 miles is a looooong commute.

So if you're sitting on your front porch and someone drives by (in a residential area, going about 15), do you wave at them and they wave at you? Regardless of whether you know them. If you're driving in the same neighborhood and you pass someone walking their dog, do you wave at them and they wave at you? We've lived in places where you definitely wave, places where you can wave, and places where people give you a very strange look when you wave, like you're about to come over there and try to sell them something.

I didn't know about this either and would find it annoying to put it mildly.

When we first moved to Missouri when I was a kid, other kids at school asked me what church we were going to go to. I said I had no idea. (I had never been to a church with my parents). They said, well, what kind of Christian are you? What religion? I went home and asked my parents, and my mom must have not understood why I was asking, because she told me we were pagans. Well, we weren't pagans. We just weren't church-goers; my dad had become disillusioned with the Southern Baptists at some point and my mom - well, she was kind of a pagan I guess. But anyway, I certainly wasn't; I had no religion. But I was 10 and naive. So I went back to school and told my friends we were pagans. Boy did that go over well.

I've learned basically the inverse: if I'm getting more than 2 things, I must take a physical list. If the brand or size or type or color or consistency or sell-by date or manufacturer or country of origin or any aspect of the thing matters, I must have a note on that as well. If you just tell me to go buy blueberries, I'm going to get a package of fresh ones, maybe from Chile, probably not organic. I might get 6 packages if I think they're a good deal and I'm hungry. But if what you actually wanted (DH is very particular about things like blueberries) is the organic wild blueberries, frozen, from USA or Canada, either 3 packages, 7 packages, or 10 packages, recloseable bag preferred - that's all got to be written down at least the first 3 or 4 times I get them. After that I can just write "blueberries" and I'll remember to get the right ones, though.

I dunno, I'm willing to give other people the benefit of the doubt; it is probably as strange/rude to them for me to yabber on about the weather as it is to me for them to stare at me blankly when I yabber on about the weather. But while I would not approach a stranger and yabber on about the weather (although I certainly might say something about it to someone with whom I am already engaged in a social exchange, like a cashier or bank teller or librarian or whatever), if someone said something to me about it I'd engage for sure. I spent a long time learning how to do this without getting too nervous. ?

Oh, and I had the strangest experience with finding a long-term rental (which may not be region-specific, but boy was it weird). We go see a house. I call and say hey, we like the house, what's next? I've already applied online, do you need anything else to process the application? Lady on the phone says, we have everything we need, it looks good, just come pay a security deposit to reserve the house. Great! I'm approved! I go get a money order for the security deposit (which is $1750, so not exactly cheap) and take it to the office to sign the lease. They take the money order, which I've made out to them, and say, okay, now we'll process your application. Wait, what? I just gave you $1750 and you haven't processed the application? Don't worry, they say, if you're not approved we'll refund it. Well, we weren't approved (it's a 4-bedroom house and we have 7 kids - it's big enough for us but some people don't want more than 2 per bedroom, which I totally understand but it's why I ask about the application, etc.). So they had to cut us a check for the $1750, which they held for a week! I've been a renter for 15 years and I have never been asked to pay a deposit before being approved to rent somewhere. It was so weird (and so inconvenient!) And it would have been so easy for them to just look at the first line of the application (total occupants: 9) and say hey, don't bother giving us the deposit for this one, etc.

About the waitress, DH and I literally spent significant time this morning puzzling over what we did to piss her off. Was it the way we interacted?, we thought. Was it the way we looked at each other? Was it a minor disagreement we had with DD? Was it the fish thing? Was it our accents? Was she just having a bad day? Man, moving is *hard*.

I think I'm going to need them! If only to assuage the constant feeling of repeated minor social rejection.

If we're not going to eat it, I throw it out or give it away. I am bad about putting off getting groceries, sometimes, though, and in that case almost everything gets eaten fast (we have 7 kids). So like, there might be a box of rye crackers, some agave syrup, a can of pinto beans, some whole wheat macaroni, frozen lima beans, and a jar of lemon juice left in the fridge. As long as I go to the store regularly, no one eats these things. But if we get down to only those things in the house, that's what they'll eat for lunch (lemonade, rye crackers and bean dip, noodles with olive oil and lima beans). If it is something so bad that no one will eat - a truly misguided purchase - even in times of real hunger - that I throw out or give away, right when I realize no one is going to eat this no matter what.

I did spend weeks saying Bang-er. And, although I figured this one out much faster, Or-RON-no. Bane-gor is hard to say in a weird way.

Hah, this is pretty much exactly how it's gone so far.

To be fair, so far we've only been in Bangor and points farther east (and down-coast from Bangor - not sure how you're supposed to say that, but like towards Bar Harbor on the coast and along the Penobscot). Winterport, etc.

I like to pass on the right when someone is turning left too, and if there's room I don't know that this is entirely uncommon in the midwest. It would be an uncommon expectation, though (so if I didn't try to squeeze through on the right and you came right up behind me and looked exasperated or honked, that would be strange to me).

When we moved to Colorado Springs, there was a 4 way stop that was pretty heavily trafficked during rush hour. The way you are supposed to navigate the stop is that you pay close attention coming up to the stop, then you go as soon as it is your turn - not waiting for the other people to stop or to complete their turns, but just go as soon as you're not going to run into anyone. If in doubt, go early. This keeps it moving fast. When we first got there, I treated it like a suburban Midwest 4-way stop; that is to say, you wait until everyone is stopped, then sort of make eye contact, then hesitate a bit, then go. I might be exaggerating but not much. No one ever honked, but it was obvious to me pretty quickly that I was doing it wrong in Colorado Springs. If I waited as long as I was used to waiting, people would just start going out of turn (skipping me) and I'd realize I'd waited through like 3 cycles of cars and there was a line behind me. I caught on within a week or so that I was supposed to jump the gun, and everything was smooth from there.

I wonder how we transmit that kind of information in the Midwest. I guess we just sort of hope someone takes them aside personally at some point and says, "I don't know if you knew, and it is such a weird way that we do it here, but if you turn left before the oncoming line of cars passes through at a green light people will get so nervous!"

I also wonder sometimes about different attitudes toward outsiders. In Colorado, no one particularly minded that I was not from there (most people aren't), as long as I made it clear that I both was not from California and agreed that Californian values were ruining the state, etc. In Missouri, if you're from just about anywhere people will think it is cool, except maybe Kansas. Here, they are not impressed. when we moved to NZ, people there were very kind about my being an American, although they thought the accent was funny and had some reasonably unkind stereotypes associated with Americans that they liked to make fun of - but they were nice about it. They were generally less impressed with Asian immigrants, though, and sometimes actually hostile.

Well, if I were plotting against you, I agree that it would be weird for me to be nice to you at the same time. But if you've just inconvenienced me, or I'm irritated by something you're doing, the polite thing to do (in my experience, obviously not everywhere) is to be nice anyway, even if I feel otherwise.

Interestingly, I had to explain to DH once long ago about the culture of this board - that often people "like" every post in a thread even if they don't particularly like it or agree with it, if it is a thread they started, as a way of showing appreciation for posting. DH thought that was crazy. Why like a post you disagree with? But I've become accustomed to it.

For me the honking is a social interaction. I feel like they are saying, "You are a terrible driver! You have made a major error!" all the time! I will desensitize to it I imagine ?