Meeting With a Couple Who Are Considering Homeschooling

[Janice in NJ]

This couple has young children.  

They have adult friends who were homeschooled.  

Both Mom and Dad have a master's degree; Mom's degree is engineering.

 

I was wondering if the hive would be willing to share some words of wisdom.  

 

Thanks in advance,

Janice

 

Enjoy your little people

Enjoy your journey

 

ETA:  I'm not asking for advice for me.  I'm asking for advice for them.  I would like to share your comments with them to balance the perspective I plan to offer.  

 

 

 

[klmama]

Here's my $.02: 

 

Don't become more committed to their homeschool than they are.  I used to spend countless hours with people who wanted info and who claimed they planned to homeschool.  I helped them find materials that would work well with their preferred approach and their dc, and in the end only a handful stuck with homeschooling beyond the first month.  Now, I give book suggestions instead of offering that first meeting.  I usually mention that they should read the Ultimate Guide to Homeschooling by Debra Bell first so they understand a variety of approaches, and if the idea of classical education appeals to them they should read the WTM (although for highly disciplined types I might suggest WTM in the beginning).  If they aren't willing to read a book about it, they aren't going to stick with it, and there's no reason to waste my time.

 

 

[Durriyyah]

I don't think their education will make a big difference in whether they can homeschool or not, but it will get some people off their back.

 

It really starts with why do they want to homeschool and what do they want to achieve. Then you can just go from there. 

[Julie of KY]

I think a lot comes down to WHY they want to homeschool. There are lots of good reasons - do they have one? In my opinion, homeschooling is best accomplished as a LIFESTYLE of learning.

 

Some people want to talk homeschooling and want an easy answer of THIS is the curriculum to use to check off the boxes. There aren't easy answers and I don't want to give my time to those kind of questions. You have to figure out what goals you want to achieve and what works for your family.

[Maura in NY]

My advice -- "you" being the couple, not you, Janice :) Don't rush with the academics. "School" is just one part of homeschooling -- it's really a lifestyle, a way to be, as a family.  Enjoy being with your children and watching them learn. Take your time, and find out how they learn best, and what motivates them. Of course you'll want to match your curriculum choices with your goals for your children, but do what you can to match to their interests and learning styles, too. Avoid the comparison game. The sooner you can detach from thinking of how they do it in "real school", the better. If I had it to do over again, the one thing I would do differently is to keep the early years full of more fun and adventure, and less book work until 7th or 8th grade. I would have focused more on family structure before school needed to become structured. (In other words, family & household responsibilities first, then school responsibilities.)

 

And enjoy the awesome adventure.

[Maureen]

I totally agree with Maura!  With 4 teenagers now, if I could turn back the clock I would have played more games and gone on more field trips.  We read a ton and I think that was our favorite part of the day.  I pulled my kids in early elementary and was stressed for several years about the comparison of what we were doing and what their friends were doing in "real" school. 

I would also caution them that homeschooling is HARD.  There have been days when I was ready to throw in the towel.  Fortunately, there have also been days when I have witnessed those wonderful light bulb moments when my child finally gets some concept they've been struggling with. 

Friends make comments that they don't even realize undermine my confidence and our lifestyle choice ("Are you going to LET your kids go to high school?" - As if they are locked in a closet!!!)  I think both parents need to be on board with the decision to homeschool and if mom is the teacher, dad needs to be the principal and support mom 100% in front of the kids. 

Good luck to them!

[dhudson]

Here's my $.02:

 

Don't become more committed to their homeschool than they are. I used to spend countless hours with people who wanted info and who claimed they planned to homeschool. I helped them find materials that would work well with their preferred approach and their dc, and in the end only a handful stuck with homeschooling beyond the first month. Now, I give book suggestions instead of offering that first meeting. I usually mention that they should read the Ultimate Guide to Homeschooling by Debra Bell first so they understand a variety of approaches, and if the idea of classical education appeals to them they should read the WTM (although for highly disciplined types I might suggest WTM in the beginning). If they aren't willing to read a book about it, they aren't going to stick with it, and there's no reason to waste my time.

I totally agree with this. I meet with a lot of couples about the prospect of homeschooling and I have found this method to work the best. They have to be willing to do the work in the beginning to be able to stick through the really hard stuff. I even recommend these same two books along with, "For the Children's Sake".