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So tired of the negativity in my house


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EVERY stupid thing is a fight.

Go get dress. Whine and moan.

Take a shower. Argue.

Practice guitar (he begged for lessons for TWO YEARS). Argue.

Pick up your stuff. Argue.

Everything is "in a minute" or "but Mom" or "I will, I will". Our oldest is the biggest problem and the younger kids are taking after him. I'm so tired of the negativity that, for the first time, I'm considering sending them all to school so I get a break!

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My 8 year old is very negative, argumentative about everything, and angry in general (no idea why)....and I see my 5 year old picking up some of her traits. She's always been such an easy going, kind hearted kid and I hate to see the negativity rubbing off on her. I totally know what you mean. :sad:

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EVERY stupid thing is a fight.

Go get dress. Whine and moan.

Take a shower. Argue.

Practice guitar (he begged for lessons for TWO YEARS). Argue.

Pick up your stuff. Argue.

Everything is "in a minute" or "but Mom" or "I will, I will". Our oldest is the biggest problem and the younger kids are taking after him. I'm so tired of the negativity that, for the first time, I'm considering sending them all to school so I get a break!

 

We had that started a couple of months ago. I put down my foot immediately: stuff left out became "mine" (he only lost one thing, his favorite nerf gun). Mine loves to shower, but I'd say no breakfast, no going to the park, guess we start schoolwork if you don't need a shower.

 

Practice? I'd stop the lessons. If he then says he wants to go on, put up a roster for practice, and any week he doesn't do it, he has to do chores to "pay" you for the lesson.

 

I also did a dialogue with him along the lines of Raising a Thinking Child. For us, him "remembering" all the things we do for him is important. Sometimes a quirky reply from me, "Well, you don't want to do X? I don't want to do Y for you, and why should I if you are being unhelpful?", goes a long, loooooong ways.

 

For the "I wants" I use: "And I want a million dollars". I don't grace the I Want with any other answer, so he knows it is futile to keep on.

 

I nip this in the bud, but if it has gotten a real roll on, I'd had a sit down powwow with the kids and tell them this attitude is to come to a screaming halt. So they know the new rules.

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