TGHEALTHYMOM Posted May 7, 2012 Author Share Posted May 7, 2012 (edited) I am letting this all go. I tried so hard to bond with her as a teenager and she hated me all the more, and is very passive aggressive. I try to talk to her but she ignores me and never considers any of our children as her siblings. I have to tell them that it must be hard for her and her brother who is so awful I can't go there right now. And she did stay with her mom for 2 weeks after the twins were born, so they have to have some relationship. They are over 6 hours away, and my dh rarely takes off work for anything. He just confessed last night of taking 20 Nitro pills this weekend and having chest pain since Friday. SO, he is at his heart Dr. now and I would not worry at all about what I was asking. I have always promoted his relationship with his 2 other grown children and they ignored him and his visits and phone calss for several years. Drugs, alchohol, and promiscuity were at the core of their lives along with his son beating his wife. So, it is hard when either come over and just want daddy to pay attention to them and ignore or make fun of us the whole time. Or chew me out for things I am not remotely responsible for. Their mom wanted abortions and no kids. She is mental and couldn't raise them for the first 10 years so my dh did and had a girlfriend that clashed badly with them. I think that has alot to do with the hatred of our family. I thought it would be easier since they were so old when he and I got married, but it is still rough on them with pent up emotions of the past eating away. I pray for them both, and try to be hospitable. My older kids do alot of cooking and cleaning and taking care of siblings, so I won't expect anything more than the normal from them. I feel guilty having to rely on them so much right now. We also cannot go to my mom's right now and she makes it clear to us. She has a flower business and her huge house is packed full, even the 2 bathrooms are full of hanging flowers and wreaths. My dad died 2 years ago and she has gotten obsessed. She enclosed the carport where we used to eat outside and has a garage, with a room behind it full, and added a laundry/ utility room and filled her old laundry room. Any Christians, please pray for my dh as he already had to have heart surgery 6 years ago and has a family history of deadly heart attacks. Edited May 7, 2012 by TGHEALTHYMOM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ezrabean2005 Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 This appears to be a father-daughter issue that just happens on Mother's Day. You have my sympathies. However, I would do the kind gesture of finding her and her brood a place to stay. You already have a large family. Open up a few more jars of spaghetti sauce or go out to eat cheaply. You have older kids who can pitch in and help with meals and clean up. Make step-dd and family sleep in a tent in the backyard or ask a friend to loan you a camper. She is being immature and selfish. But as the older one, do her a favor by showing her love and ignoring her rudeness. I would hope one day she wakes up and realizes what a nitwit she had been to you. But I would never turn her away. That would be your husband's job to tell his own daughter NO. Worse case, get them a hotel room. But you are a blended family and you have to work this issue out with love and not war. This is not a hill to die on. :iagree: Can't you ask the renovation to be post-poned until you aren't 37 weeks pregnant? Family is family. She is your family and wants to visit her father and step-mother. I would overlook any potential ulterior motives. Her relationship with her mother isn't your business. Blended families are tricky enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted May 7, 2012 Share Posted May 7, 2012 He just confessed last night of taking 20 Nitro pills this weekend and having chest pain since Friday. SO, he is at his heart Dr. now and I would not worry at all about what I was asking. :mellow: Egads. I don't know that I'd even notice extra people at this point. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NorthwestMom Posted May 8, 2012 Share Posted May 8, 2012 :grouphug: I hope everything works out for the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hannah C. Posted May 8, 2012 Share Posted May 8, 2012 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: If I had your current housing situation, and *any* relative wanted to come visit with her boyfriend and twin kids, I would say "We would love to see you, but it is simply impossible for you to stay with us at this time. Here are some nearby hotels." They could still visit during the day, of course. I would not offer to help pay for the hotel. I hope it all works out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.