Three Crows Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 This is an unedited first draft by my 8yo 2nd grader. He wrote this after doing independent research online. Are we way off target for 2nd grade? Commas, run ons... what else should we be focusing on? -- Kay The Black Hole and How It Works This is a thing on black holes. A black hole is big black and is a hole in space time. Gravity walks up to a star boom super nova now there is a black hole. The outer event horizon is where you have a small chance on getting out of the gravity in the inner event horizon no getting out of there. Singularity is the middle of the BLACK HOLE. Light can not even get out of a black hole wow how cool is that. If you got close to a black hole it will pull you in so hard you will be torn in half. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
go_go_gadget Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 I think the content is excellent, and his understanding of the material is clearly good. Other than the punctuation errors and run-ons, the only problems I see are the incorrect use of "on" in "you have a small chance on getting out of the gravity", and the missing "there is" in "inner event horizon no getting out of there." Also, the tense is inconsistent in "If you got close to a black hole it will pull you in so hard you will be torn in half." So minor technical issues, but quite good for second grade, especially if the spelling is all his. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2_girls_mommy Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 I agree. I would love it if my 2nd grader wrote that on her own, and would help some with the editing. Good job! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mytwomonkeys Posted January 13, 2012 Share Posted January 13, 2012 I think your second grader is doing excellent!!! Really. For contrast - this is my son's paper this week (he's also in grade 2 and will be 8 at the end of March): If you could have one wish, what would it be and why? I would wish for three arms on both sides of my body because it would be so cool! LOL. so, from my POV, it looks amazing:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
acurtis75 Posted January 20, 2012 Share Posted January 20, 2012 I think your second grader is doing excellent!!! Really. For contrast - this is my son's paper this week (he's also in grade 2 and will be 8 at the end of March): If you could have one wish, what would it be and why? I would wish for three arms on both sides of my body because it would be so cool! LOL. so, from my POV, it looks amazing:) This made me lol....he answered the question and provided his reason. My dd often tries to come up with the shortest answer possible and in that regard this was a great effort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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