stressed out and burnt out

[faiths13]

I have 4 at home all day ages 2, 4, 10, & 12. I feel like I am spending 90% of my day working with the older kids and almost no time with the little kids. By 3pm I am exhausted and in a bad mood from working my butt off doing so much with the older kids. I feel like I am doing their school work too! At this point I have no idea how I could possibly hs my 4 yr old who will be in K in August! I cant even do pre k with him anymore!

 

And to top it off, math is my worst subject. So I am having an extremely difficult time trying to help them with math - especially my oldest. He has a very hard time with math as well. We just started Math Mammoth and the teachers book doesnt explain how to do problems, just gives answers. So there are a bunch of problems I dont understand and cant help him do. And I am quickly getting burnt out trying to do so much work every day. And right now we are only doing grammar, writing and math! Help!

 

I feel like I dont even know what hs is anymore - Like I am just doing ps at home. I feel so lost about they "should" be doing and what they "need" tp learn. I know they need to do reading, writing, math. But how far do they need to really go in every subject every year? I know they go over the same things every year in grammar and writing and the same thing every 4 years in history so it all repeats itself. but it seems like they dont remember anything from previous years. maybe its because in ps they never got it and they are learning for the first time. i dont know. all i know is im stressed and worked to the bone and i dont even know what my kids are getting out of it!

[Lang Syne Boardie]

:grouphug: Is this your first year hs'ing, then, and your older two were in ps before?

[faiths13]

:grouphug: Is this your first year hs'ing, then, and your older two were in ps before?

 

:) This is our second year. We started last August and my oldest have always been in ps. I wanted to hs before, but couldnt. ive spent the past year and a half stressing about curric and picking whats best and is it good enough and are they learning, etc. sigh... i just feel like i need to find a new way to do hs and think of it and get out of this stress mode and ps mindset.

[battlemaiden]

You have a natural separation. Embrace it.

 

In the morning you combine 10 & 12 yos for the humanities- history, literature, etc.

 

Then you send them off on their independent way (with the understanding that their afternoon life will be miserable if they do NOT gain self-control and discipline to get their work done on their own). And you work/read/play with the littles while the olders are working independently.

 

After lunch you read together. Littles put down for naps. You say to two olders, "I'm going to have a cup of tea in my room. I'm turning off the phone. Don't answer the door. You must read _____ pages from these books during this quiet time."

 

Then you regroup for and hour and return to grade papers and check work. Bad work gets "afternoon school." Mention that you wish they didn't have to attend "afternoon school" but because they turned in shoddy work they must.

 

You play outside with the littles, return to tidy up house, prepare dinner, etc.

 

Dinner, clean-up, baths, books, bed (or *evening school* if their afternoon school was shoddy).

 

Your CAN do this! We've all had these moments when we realize something isn't working. Tweak, adjust, adapt.

 

And Merry Christmas from a teacher of 5 solid grades with 2 preschoolers,

 

~Jo

[black_midori]

You can do this!!!!!

 

For starters - figure out what can be done independently.

- schedule it in! I do most of my 1st grader's mom-intensive stuff while my 2nd grader does his independent work (and there is all-to-little of that yet, but enough!). Schedule interaction time with littles!

- Get something set up where if they are done and ready for more work they can go grab it from their "to-do" box. That way you won't have them standing at your shoulder every few minutes looking for something to do.

- See what you can "outsource" to computer-based comfortably as an added independent item.

 

In particular for computers:

- I am using Exploration Education for science (2nd grade but can comfortably go up to 6/7). It is a dvd that he watches a lesson on, then answers questions to & the program tells him if his answers are correct or if he needs to go back & re-read. Once they are correct, he marks the answers down in his lab book and proceeds to doing the lab experiment (which is walked through on the dvd & backed up with lab book writing).

 

- My friend uses ALEKS math program for math, which is an online artificial intelligence that allows your child to work at their own pace, gives explanations as needed on how to solve problems, and "knows" when they need more work in an area vs when they are ready to progress to something else. I haven't used it yet, but I plan to next year - I won't use it for my main math teaching (which I really want to do teacher-hands-on and love RightStart for), but I absolutely would LOVE LOVE to use it for my math supplement instead of the Math Mammoth worksheets we do now!! Just the joy of having someone ELSE (or something else, anyway) calmly indicate whether an answer is right or wrong and give walk-through explanations over and over and over without getting irritable would make it worth it to me... :D

 

What are you using for grammar, writing & math? Are you doing too much with it? Are they far behind and you are trying to catch up? How much time to you put into each of those each day? Can you alternate days?

 

I school 4 days a week

- I do math every day with supplemental practice (new teachings 1 or 2 times a week)

- I do reading every day

- I do everything else mainly 2 times a week (some 1 time, some 3 times, but average 2 times) - this includes grammar, writing & spelling, but we do have some writing (during which I point out any grammar/spelling issues) in other subjects throughout the week.

[meggie]

I have no advice, just :grouphug:

 

Hoping you get some good advice from the real homeschoolers here :001_smile:. Could you maybe take a break from school for Christmas and use that time to figure out a new method?

[faiths13]

Normally they have been pretty independent, but we just switched from K12 to a new curric and all the sudden I am hand holding them through everything for some reason. We started on Voyages in English and Math Mammoth - I dont know if its just harder than what they are used to or what... Last year they did Easy Grammar and ALEKS and worked indepdently. This year I am spending alot of time teaching them the work and then going over all their mistakes when they are done. I wonder if Im giving them too much work a day or what. I dont know...

 

We just got the books on Friday and yes I may be having them do too much. I feel like now I need to catch up because we are with a charter and we take a summer break and so i want to get as much done as we can before summer break. i know i am putting this stress on myself, but i cant help but feel like it "needs" to get done. i am trying to get them through 2 lessons a day in grammar and 1-2 pages in math. they have 2-3 grammar books though, so its several pages of work. plus spelling and handwriting. so the spelling, grammar, writing and handwriting is taking prob 3 hours a day and then math which takes another 1-2 hours. then there is no time or energy for anything else. but this is also because they are moving onto a new subject every day and i have to teach them (even though sometimes it seems like they should have already learned it a previous year) and then if i have them do the work on their own they get alot wrong.

Edited December 15, 2011 by faiths13

[faiths13]

I have no advice, just :grouphug:

 

Hoping you get some good advice from the real homeschoolers here :001_smile:. Could you maybe take a break from school for Christmas and use that time to figure out a new method?

 

 

thanks :) we do have xmas break...maybe thats what i should do with it. honestly i was thinking about trying to push them through it to get more work done! i feel like a slave driver and i hate it!

[thowell]

I can understand how you feel. I think we all can! I would say that the time period you are spending on each subject for their ages is quite long. I know you feel you need to "catch up". However, would you rather stuff it in them only to have them forget it, or slowly learn it and they actually remember it? At their ages I would not have lessons over 30-45 minutes in the core subjects. if you need to do more, then break up the lessons at different times of the day. Also have you thought about combining them for the other subjects?

 

Math Mammoth is very conceptual thinking and it may take them some time to get use to it. However, the books should be directed to the child with all the instructions and examples at the beginning of each new concept. You could also use Khan academy for any topics you have a hard time explaining.

 

I agree the little ones need their own time. Who gets up first? Could morning time be for the little ones while the older ones sleep a bit more? Have you considered the loop scheduling? You can do this you just have to keep tweaking until you find your groove!

[....]

Hi, you should visit the curriculum/logic stage boards. We always have threads on combining ages...or scheduling...I have a thread about Loop Scheduling on there this week.

 

I am teaching a 10 yro, 9 yro, 7 yro and 4 yro this year. It is VERY difficult. We've been homeschooling for 3 years - I think next year is our 4th year homeschooling. It really does take all day.

 

So, I'm not sure I understand your post. Are you with a charter school now? If so, THAT might be one reason why you're having time management problems. I don't see how you could use strategies for large families with a charter.

 

Anyway, here's what seems to work in our house.

 

1. Combine as much as humanly possible. All 4 of my kids are doing Art, History, Read-Alouds and Science together.

 

2. The 10 yro and 9 yro are combined for Literature, Religion, Logic and Latin.

 

3. I'm going to try a Loop Schedule in January. Basically, we will start the day off with Math. The remaining subjects are listed in an order that we'll follow. Then, we'll rotate thru 3 or 4 subject blocks (whatever we have time for). The next day, after Math, we'll pick up where we left off in the list of subjects. (There's a better explanation on the curriculum board - I haven't had enough coffee yet.)

 

4. The Peace Hill Press store has some audio lectures on teaching the different stages. She has a lecture on getting kids to work independently - it might help you.

 

5. You're using Voyages and Math Mammoth? Those are very good programs. Don't give up. My 10 yro is working towards the end of Math Mammoth and I am really impressed. It is a very solid program.

 

6. As far as taking summers off - you can lose so much ground. I wouldn't take the summer off. Even if your charter doesn't run during the summer, I would homeschool yourselves during the summer. Maybe do schoolwork until noon and give them the rest of the day. Schooling year-round takes away a LOT of stress...the "hurry up, we don't have much time stress"...and then you can take a day off during the school year and not feel guilty. Plus, you don't have to reteach everything all fall.

 

7. If you leave your charter school, there are curricula out there written for big families. My Father's World http://www.mfwbooks.com/ Tapestry of Grace http://www.tapestryofgrace.com/index.php You'll be able to cover all the subjects, combine everyone and gain back some of your day.

 

Good luck! Post on the curriculum board. There is a LOT of great advice on there. I would be lost without asking questions on there (you can see from my post count that I have a lot of questions - LOL).

[amo_mea_filiis.]

And to top it off, math is my worst subject. So I am having an extremely difficult time trying to help them with math - especially my oldest. He has a very hard time with math as well. We just started Math Mammoth and the teachers book doesnt explain how to do problems, just gives answers. So there are a bunch of problems I dont understand and cant help him do.

 

I assume you gave placement tests for math mammoth?

 

Maria Miller has a very nice blog and videos explaning concepts. I had forgotten about that and was reminded with my recent math question.

 

You could also google the topic you're having trouble with and read every possible web site until YOU get it. There are tons out there. Youtube has a lot, as well.

[....]

I assume you gave placement tests for math mammoth?

 

Maria Miller has a very nice blog and videos explaning concepts. I had forgotten about that and was reminded with my recent math question.

 

You could also google the topic you're having trouble with and read every possible web site until YOU get it. There are tons out there. Youtube has a lot, as well.

 

:iagree: I also bought the Kitchen Table Math series. If there is something I can't figure out how to teach, I can look in there and read the explanation and the math behind the algorithm (or whatever it is).

[Alison in KY]

Keep in mind you are in a marathon, not a sprint race. Stop and try to remember why you are doing this and find some joy back in your day. It is hard to homeschool and maintain the house and play with the little ones. It just is, but realizing that you have time, that it's not going to happen quickly or overnight, will help you.

 

Switching to a new curriculum and starting it takes quite a bit of time. You can ease into it slowly...the more you stress and push the more your kids are going to feel it and probably stress themselves. Focus on the math and English and know that if you do something in each of those, that you have accomplished something for the day.

 

There are times that I school extremely lightly, because I'm worn out, or my kids are...or both. On those times I count doing some pretty simple things as English and math (like if they read some of a book and write in cursive, do some math facts, and unload the dishes) Some days that can all be quite an achievement. However, there are other times where things just flow and I accomplish quite a bit...and this is the goal. However, know if you are all stressing, then it's just one of those days to take it easy and enjoy life being home with your family.

 

There are other programs that teach math that will give more handholding, if you need it. We are so blessed to have as much homeschool help as we do, it just takes awhile to find what fits us and our kiddos.

 

Hope all of this helps, and if you need to, just PM with specific quiestions, or go over to the curricula boards and ask away.

 

Alison

[Catherine]

First, make sure their math placement is accurate. Especially since this is your first year, you may find they need to revisit earlier concepts, to be solid in them. Second, if you are not confident in your own math, you need more than just answers. You may need to find a different program that is more scripted or walks you and the child through problems. Rightstart does a great job of promoting understanding. Some programs provide a student solutions manual (Lial's Basic College Math has this) that has worked problems.

[faiths13]

I didnt give them placement tests. I put my 10 yr old in his grade level math because he does well with math, and i put my 12 yr old one level down because he struggles. as for grammar i put them in grade level because they both do well with that subject. i cant afford to buy any new curric. the charter i am with doesnt set a schedule or tell us how or what to do - it is very relaxed. they just pay for our curric up to a certain amount. i agree if we had year round school i would feel less stress about "getting it done". but because my kids have been in ps most of their lives they feel that they "should" get the summer off. and my 10 yr old has all his friends in the neighborhood who will be off all summer.

 

i dont know what looping is? but i will go look for it in a bit. i am trying really hard to relax today, lol. so far at least. i just keep thinking will they get what they need if they want to go to college, etc? i just want them to have all the opportunities in life that i never had.

[amo_mea_filiis.]

I didnt give them placement tests. I put my 10 yr old in his grade level math because he does well with math, and i put my 12 yr old one level down because he struggles. as for grammar i put them in grade level because they both do well with that subject. i cant afford to buy any new curric.

 

Everything that I've read, and in my experience, kids going from PS to HS will be about 2 years back in math. Not because they're really behind, just that the curriculum is different.

 

My dd will be officially HSing next year, but currently only tests into 2nd grade math mammoth. She's in 5th! She uses a public cyber, so I only lightly "afterschool" her with math mammoth 2nd grade so she'll be ready next year. The plus with math mammoth is that I only have to buy it once. Hopefully ds will do well with 1st MM and will move on to already purchased 2nd grade.

 

It's possible that part of your frustrations are that kids are not properly placed, making the work too hard.

[faiths13]

Everything that I've read, and in my experience, kids going from PS to HS will be about 2 years back in math. Not because they're really behind, just that the curriculum is different.

 

My dd will be officially HSing next year, but currently only tests into 2nd grade math mammoth. She's in 5th! She uses a public cyber, so I only lightly "afterschool" her with math mammoth 2nd grade so she'll be ready next year. The plus with math mammoth is that I only have to buy it once. Hopefully ds will do well with 1st MM and will move on to already purchased 2nd grade.

 

It's possible that part of your frustrations are that kids are not properly placed, making the work too hard.

 

wow! yeah i did a placement test with K12 for my ods and he was very far behind in everything. but i am not willing to put him into 2 grade math when he is in 7th grade. he just needs to brush up on some stuff.

 

we are in CA so the ps are ahead of everyone else by a year. i think one problem i need to work on is making a schedule. that way the kids can work independently if i am busy, and i will also start correcting work later and having them do it for homework. that way i am not running back and forth to check their work and tell them what to do next, etc.