rwilliams Posted January 15, 2011 Share Posted January 15, 2011 Yes, we have them and my kids go to them. No, they don't have sex, believe it or not. And no, I am not really naive. They only sleep with others in a shared situation- all sprawled out on several mattresses places together in the loungeroom, parents nearby and able to walk in at any moment- or they sleep boys in one room, girls in another- which is what they do at my place because I have a son and a daughter close in age with their own bedroom each, so its easy to do it that way. Quite often there are half a dozen or more kids involved. We have a unique situation of my kids being very close to another homeschooling family of 2 girls the same ages as my 2, whose parents are very liberal- even more so than us in this way. These 4 kids are in the same Venturer group (previously Scouts) and also the same teen gymnastic group, as well as being homeschoolers- they have a very tight but large group of friends, both male and female. They all watch each other, they are all good friends, and yes, some are bf/gf at different times, and sometimes groups of them have sleepovers. Summer hols here right now- its fairly frequent. There is no actual harm being done. No sex is being had. And they are having a warm, loving and open teenagerhood where physical contact, hugging, and even co-sleeping (in groups, parents around) is normal. I wish I had had a childhood like that. It might well have prevented me from being promiscuous and desperate for male affection in my teens. I agree. I think letting kids hang out with parental supervision is much better than wondering what is happening. I would want the hanging out to occur at my house or houses where I realy trusted the parents but I see nothing wrong with kids 15 or over to have sleepovers with close adult supervision. It seems a great way to keep an eye on them and out of trouble. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Medieval Mom Posted January 15, 2011 Share Posted January 15, 2011 I grew up in Germany. I attended plenty coed sleepovers which were really just that. Often after parties so people could stay late (nobody had cars and public transportation did not run late at night). There were no sexual connotations at all. Even the couples who dated knew the unwritten rules on how to behave at a group sleepover.This said: everybody would have had plenty of other opportunities for things outside these sleepovers. I am constantly surprise by the many sexual undertones in this country. But then - this came up in another discussion - one of my home town's public pools is a nude pool, for example, and nobody thinks twice about it. Well, I was a teenager in Germany. Dh was a teenager... well, all over the world; but he's from Europe. We'd both have to disagree with you :lol: I typed out several interesting stories and experiences, but I think that's going a bit too far for this (public) board. :D But that's off subject. To the OP: You're right. That's just craziness waiting to happen. :tongue_smilie: NOT A GOOD IDEA. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Medieval Mom Posted January 15, 2011 Share Posted January 15, 2011 Hormones are hormones, and it is reasonable to suppose that adolescents have less experience with controlling their urges and would be more susceptible to temptation. No matter how wonderful those young men are, biology is biology and boys that age get erections at the very thought of a girl, let alone 'snuggling' one or sleeping next to one. So, why would I as a parent want to facilitate a situation that may result in causing a young person to give into that temptation? I noticed that most of the posters who are in favor of these activities are female. I think as women we are more inclined to think warm, fuzzy thoughts about friendship and affection between the young people. Any men out there want to speak out about what they think might be going on in the minds of those young boys? :iagree: My dh and good male friend agree with you absolutely and completely. My friend once said to me, "Any boy between the ages of 16 and 25 who says that he's not thinking about *** is lying." :D Well, THAT'S stating it boldly! When asked about this thread, dh just shook his head and gave me that look, as in, "Oh, come ON! You've GOT to be kidding!" ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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