good book on human body/sexuality for 10 year old boy?

[ktgrok]

My son will be 11 in a few months. We've discussed the basics of sex, so he "knows where babies come from" and we've discussed that babies and sex are something you need to wait for, as no one wants to have to take care of a baby when they are a teenager. (the fact that there is a 3 month old in our house helps cement that lesson!) But I want something for him that discusses puberty, the changes his body will be going through, masturbation, and "wet dreams". I know that he is too embarrassed to discuss this stuff with me, and his father (my ex husband) is not really taking a lead in this, and honestly I think with my son the best idea is a book he can flip through in private. He's a good reader. Any suggestions? My personal beliefs are that masturbation is healthy, but sex should wait for marriage, and I would love a book that reflects that outlook. However, if I have to choose, its important to me that it reflects masturbation as healthy...i do not want a book that shames him regarding that.

[khall]

I haven't actually read this, but Sonlight has "The Boy's Body Book" by Dunham listed as a resource and recommended for ages 11-13. Hope that helps!

[Melissa in CA]

I haven't actually read this, but Sonlight has "The Boy's Body Book" by Dunham listed as a resource and recommended for ages 11-13. Hope that helps!

 

This book does not talk about any of the things you want addressed. It is very basic boy hygiene stuff....great book!...but it does NOT talk about masturbation in any way, shape, nor form.

 

Personally, I would talk to him about it. I KNOW how hard it is, trust me, but you CAN do it. ;) Just tell him it's a science lesson or something. Perhaps go through a book WITH him. Make it very matter-of-fact, not a hush-hush-this-is-embarrassing-stuff lesson. :D My ds's were embarrassed too, but we had great discussions. If you treat it like it's no big deal, this is life buddy and you've got to know about this stuff, he will be less embarrassed. If you just hand him a book, it's going to stay an embarrassing subject he will know he cannot talk to you about. Believe me, having raised two boys, and one who is 13...it's VERY important to be open about this stuff!! It's life...no reason for any of you to be ashamed or embarrassed to talk about it. :001_smile:

 

I used SL's Science 5 when my youngest ds was 11. When it got to the s#x stuff, we slowed down and walked through it together. I added in a lot of stuff not talked about in SL and it proved to be the perfect avenue to have our birds & bees discussion without much embarrassment for either of us. :D

[Jen+4dc]

I haven't actually read this, but Sonlight has "The Boy's Body Book" by Dunham listed as a resource and recommended for ages 11-13. Hope that helps!

 

I used this with my ds when he turned 10. It's really good.

 

http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=158030&highlight=boys+book+sex

 

http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?t=176393&highlight=boys

 

These threads have good suggestions.

 

HTH

[ktgrok]

thanks everyone! I researched it a bit more, and chose the AMA's book on becoming a teenager, as it seemed to address everything I wanted to cover. I will try to work this into our science lessons, and will make sure to touch base with him and let him know we can discuss it, etc. It's not so much that I'm embarrassed, as it is that he is embarrassed. He was very hostile to me discussing sex with him, so I think this will take the pressure off him.

[bookfiend]

Lintball Leo's Not-So-Stupid Questions About Your Body by Walt Larimore MD, Mike Phillips, and John Riddle

 

I checked this our of our church library. The tone is nice and matter-of-fact and it's clearly written to be read by a pre-teen. I don't recall if there was mention of masturbation, but definitely covered wet dreams and changing body.

 

IMO, a book can't replace the value of open, on-going communication, but it's a great companion. When I was this age, I had a few books that I liked to review periodically. It was just reassuring.

[nitascool]

We use(d) Learning About Sex for Boys

 

It's a series of 5 books:

Why Boys and Girls Are Different is for ages 4 to 6.

Where Do Babies Come From? is for ages 7 to 9.

How You Are Changing is for ages 10 to 12.

Sex & the New You is for ages 13 to 15.

Love, Sex & God is for teenagers and young adults over the age of 15. Boy's Editions.

 

While these are Christian books we felt that "How You Are Changing" did a good job of covering wet dreams and boy's sexuality without giving that sense of shame that so many "Christian" books tend to. It was a good balance of the private life of boys and the information they need at that age.

 

It's best to use these as discussion books. If you can trust your X to read it with him that would probably be best but if not you might have to just let him know that it will be a bit embarrassing for both of you and that it's okay to be so but that this is stuff you feel is important enough to warrant the discomfort.

 

Be sure you get the BOYS book though because the 1st non-gender specific books go into both boys and girls and I'm sure your son would be grossed out by the girls section (especially at that age).

 

Best of luck with whatever you decide to use.