Saying Hello and asking a question (re: siblings sharing a room)

[Janna]

Hello everyone! It's been a long time since I've been on the boards! I thought I would stop by and say hello to anyone who might remember me and also to ask a question. Afterall, you ladies (and men) truly are the best source for advice on certain subjects. First though, I'll just quickly update you on my life.

 

Since I was last on the boards my dh had just accepted a job in a completely new field after having been unemployed for 6 months. With this new job came a 30% reduction in income because he was starting over in careers. This has *not* been an easy transition for our family. Because of the drastic decrease in pay and our commitment to homeschooling, dh has taken a 2nd job, working out of the home making survey calls on evenings and Saturdays. This 2nd job is what pays for our food, therefore, we don't see him often. But, we are doing what needs to be done to remain intact as a family and to carry out our commitments to each other.

 

In addition, when I left the boards, I had 1 year old who was still napping twice a day. Now he is 21mos old, napping only once and getting up earlier in the mornings. He is very happy, but very busy. This has been a tremendous challenge to me where homeschooling is concerned. It has made me 2nd guess what I'm doing, and the quality of education my kids have been getting while I try to adjust. It's a journey for sure. But I'm feeling a *little* bit more equipped and hoping that each passing day will help me in my confidence which has wavered considerably.

 

I know there are so many who find their spouse out of work right now, and may have been looking for a long time. I am sure many families have had to put their children in school to become a 2-income family in order to survive. I cannot rule out that that is in our future as well, but for now I am thankful dh has not only 1 job, but 2 and we have been able to stay in our home and eat. My heart goes out to all of you who find you are not in as fortunate of a position. Your plight is not lost on me.

 

Now for the question:

 

Our ds (the 21mo old) has slept in our bedroom since he was born. We are at a point where we would really like him to move in with his 8 yo brother. We don't have a 4th bedroom, so sharing with someone is required. What is the best way to transition to this? Ds (8) has always had a room to himself. His toys are in there, and in fact, the non-childproofed ones have been contained to his room. This means some drastic reorganization would need to take place as well as rules, I assume. Do you have any ideas for this? How has it worked in your home when siblings of a big age difference share a room? Also, ds (21mo) wakes up earlier than ds (8). How does this work in terms of the baby waking up his brother? I assume there's nothing I can do about it but go get ds and let the other ds fall back asleep or make him get up too.

 

With our other two children we always transitioned them to twin sized beds on their 2nd birthday. Ds (21mo) will be 2yo in May. Rather than move him into a new bed in a new room all at once, we thought it would be best to move him in with his brother now while still in his crib and transition to the bed in May. We just need some tips and pointers in this area.

 

Thanks so much and hope you all are doing well, too!

 

~Janna

[anotherbrother]

While my kids are closer in age than yours, all three of my boys shared a room until recently.

 

For your younger son, I would leave him in a crib until he starts climbing out. The more they're contained the better IMO. If he is still in a crib the bedroom can be used just for sleeping with no risk to the toys. My other kids have learned that if they don't want their little brother touching or breaking something that it needs to be put up out of his reach.

 

As far as the waking early goes, my other kids always slept through the little one. I would suspect after an adjustment period the same would be true of yours. You may find that your younger son will sleep later if he is not in your room. They have a tendency to sense our sleep patterns and movements, that may be what's waking him up early.

 

Good luck on the transition.

[JudoMom]

Hello everyone! It's been a long time since I've been on the boards! I thought I would stop by and say hello to anyone who might remember me and also to ask a question. Afterall, you ladies (and men) truly are the best source for advice on certain subjects. First though, I'll just quickly update you on my life.

 

Since I was last on the boards my dh had just accepted a job in a completely new field after having been unemployed for 6 months. With this new job came a 30% reduction in income because he was starting over in careers. This has *not* been an easy transition for our family. Because of the drastic decrease in pay and our commitment to homeschooling, dh has taken a 2nd job, working out of the home making survey calls on evenings and Saturdays. This 2nd job is what pays for our food, therefore, we don't see him often. But, we are doing what needs to be done to remain intact as a family and to carry out our commitments to each other.

 

In addition, when I left the boards, I had 1 year old who was still napping twice a day. Now he is 21mos old, napping only once and getting up earlier in the mornings. He is very happy, but very busy. This has been a tremendous challenge to me where homeschooling is concerned. It has made me 2nd guess what I'm doing, and the quality of education my kids have been getting while I try to adjust. It's a journey for sure. But I'm feeling a *little* bit more equipped and hoping that each passing day will help me in my confidence which has wavered considerably.

 

I know there are so many who find their spouse out of work right now, and may have been looking for a long time. I am sure many families have had to put their children in school to become a 2-income family in order to survive. I cannot rule out that that is in our future as well, but for now I am thankful dh has not only 1 job, but 2 and we have been able to stay in our home and eat. My heart goes out to all of you who find you are not in as fortunate of a position. Your plight is not lost on me.

 

Now for the question:

 

Our ds (the 21mo old) has slept in our bedroom since he was born. We are at a point where we would really like him to move in with his 8 yo brother. We don't have a 4th bedroom, so sharing with someone is required. What is the best way to transition to this? Ds (8) has always had a room to himself. His toys are in there, and in fact, the non-childproofed ones have been contained to his room. This means some drastic reorganization would need to take place as well as rules, I assume. Do you have any ideas for this? How has it worked in your home when siblings of a big age difference share a room? Also, ds (21mo) wakes up earlier than ds (8). How does this work in terms of the baby waking up his brother? I assume there's nothing I can do about it but go get ds and let the other ds fall back asleep or make him get up too.

 

With our other two children we always transitioned them to twin sized beds on their 2nd birthday. Ds (21mo) will be 2yo in May. Rather than move him into a new bed in a new room all at once, we thought it would be best to move him in with his brother now while still in his crib and transition to the bed in May. We just need some tips and pointers in this area.

 

Thanks so much and hope you all are doing well, too!

 

~Janna

 

 

I just wanted to say Hi :D!

 

Ds10 & ds4 share a room (this was ds10's choice). I'm not sure I've got any advice for you, though.

[Jean in Newcastle]

Good to see you, Janna.

 

It sounds like transitioning him while still in his crib would be best.

 

Have you thought about putting the older two together ? I know they are different gender but I shared with my brother for a time when young. Then all the big kid toys could be together. Then when the youngest is a bit older (say around 4 and able to be around bigger kid toys) you could then transition again to having the boys together.

[MamaT]

Hi Janna!

 

My youngest son moved in with my oldest when he was still in a crib. My oldest was 12yo at the time and it was actually his idea.

 

It sounds like moving him while he is in a crib (and confined) would be a good idea. Your older son will probably fall back asleep if the little one gets up early, or the toddler may actually sleep later when you move him.

 

As for toys, you are probably going to have to teach your older son to put his toys up where the toddler can't reach them, or maybe in the closet if the toddler cannot open the door by himself.

 

It doesn't hurt older children to make adjustments for younger siblings. It teaches them to be unselfish and they feel mature when they get to help with the littles IMO.

[rose_king]

I am one of 3 children. When we were little I shared a room with my 2 little brothers. (There was no choice, the house only had 2 bdrms) I learned to love to play cars ;) I can remember the youngest bro. in his crib in our room. I also remember him falling out of the crib for the first time. :001_huh: I think it would be good for the older one to share a room with the younger. I bet he even starts helping with him more. :001_smile: Don't worry about the early bird waking his brother. He will sleep right through it.