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Posts posted by sassenach

  1. We've actually had several house projects done during this time. Everyone has been really good about masking and the truth is that we don't spend a lot of time around the workers. We give them their space and then air things out/wipe down afterwards. We have one very high risk kid and we keep him in an isolated room while the workers are here. Even though our house is small, I've never felt unsafe.

    • Like 2
  2. 1 hour ago, Scarlett said:

    I can’t wait to see a pic.  Hale Navy keeps coming up as a favorite and best seller.  How did you decide upon it ?  Did you try several samples first?

    Hale Navy is dark, like SW Naval. Since you said you want lighter, look at BM Gentleman's Gray (spoiler, it isn't gray at all). It's a smidge lighter than Hale Navy. 

    You really must do samples. You never know how it will look in the space. I second (or third) going with lighter uppers. I would only do the blue on the lower cabinets and would go with white/light neutral countertops and uppers.

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  3. No, I can't say that it makes me feel jealous at all. It sometimes concerns me when a child turns to dd23 (most often it's ds18) because she is unwise and often gives bad/toxic advice.

    I delight in ds18 and dd16's friendship. There were some years when their maturity wasn't a match and they grew apart and that really bummed me out. But now they're back on the same level and close again. I don't even mind when they keep secrets from me (dd always knows Ds's girl status before the rest of us). 

    Not that you were asking this, but I also have the inter sibling jealousy dynamic with my kids. Dd 23 always struggled with the younger 2's relationship. I felt sorry for her, too, however, she often dug her own hole with that. As a young adult, I can't say that I'm sorry that she's not close with them (see above).

    • Like 3
  4. The truth is, there's not a lot of data on it. The only people I personally know who have had Covid and then the vaccine are younger and they didn't react any more strongly than I'm hearing everyone else is. I would be cautious about the Pfizer vaccine (and probably avoid it), as there has been some concern about higher than normal bad reactions and deaths in the elderly. I think you're right to be concerned.

  5. 40 minutes ago, dirty ethel rackham said:

    Our students are spread over 5 counties and they are all doing things differently.  I am 2 miles from the border of the one county that has its act together.  The county where I am doing my clinicals is relying on the hospitals to administer the vaccine.  But one hospital made national news for giving the vaccine to employees who work from home while other hospitals don't have enough for their staff with direct patient care responsibilities (like the one I'm at where community positivity rates are among the top 3 in the state. )  They said it was due to the fact that it was going to expire.  But that still meant the employee had to come in to get the vaccine.  They could have issued an alert to surrounding hospitals to send their employees over.  

    Are you in CA, too, or is it just like this everywhere?

  6. 1 minute ago, Gobblygook said:

    It is fantastic that Oregon is prioritizing people with disabilities. We have a son who is developmentally disabled and medically complex with a history of very severe respiratory issues. There is still no word on when PCAs and other caregivers, much less families of those with disabilities, can be vaccinated here. I am hoping it will be sooner rather than later. 

    My son is the same and he's waaaaayyyy down the list. It upsets me. Dh, a high school baseball coach, is going to get his soon because he's a school employee. While I'm grateful for another level of protection for our household, it still bugs us that the most at risk person in our house is getting his vaccine so much later.

    • Sad 3
  7. On 1/12/2021 at 10:12 AM, dirty ethel rackham said:

    I have been in this no man's land regarding getting the vaccine.  I'm a student doing clinicals in a hospital in a high community spread area, where I am required to spend 30+ minutes in close contact with each patient.  Even though I don't work with known COVID or PUI patients, I do deal with emergency room patients and outpatients who may be asymptomatic.  Fortunately, our hospital has adequate PPE and we are encouraged to treat everyone as capable of spreading COVID.  

    Our county created a website and said that health care providers would be able to get it through the county, but it was confusing and made it look like the sign up was still in development.  But it encouraged you to sign up for their email updates.  It took me a couple of weeks to find out that they were using this sign up to send out links to small batches health care providers to make an appointment  - they would send them out to small groups of people from their list as they opened up appointments.  If I had known this earlier, I would have signed up for the updates earlier.   I only found out about this because a classmate had a family member get one of these emails. 

    Also, even though the CDC says that students working in health care should be eligible for the vaccine, the documentation required by the county would have made that impossible.  The hospital where I'm doing clinicals does not give badges to students (and we obviously wouldn't have a pay stub.)  

    I found out yesterday that, after getting some pushback from our college, the county will accept my college student ID and documentation that I am enrolled in a clinicals course.  The same day, I found out that my hospital is planning on vaccinating students within the next couple of weeks.  I am so relieved that I will be able to get a vaccine.  

    I know it will be a long time before we will have enough people vaccinated that we can get back to "normal."  

    We've had the same fight here, except our students are spread out across about 6 different counties and each county is doing it differently. It seems like the most consistent route has been for people to contact their primary care providers, but people are getting it however they can. I logged onto a county zoom and harassed our health officer in the chat box about it. He ignored me in the zoom but my county updated the website the next day to include students in healthcare. It's been a huge oversight, for sure.

  8. 6 hours ago, Carrie12345 said:

    I’m sorry that the situation is worse than you knew, but also glad that you’ve resisted entangling yourself even more.

    Personally, I don’t find confronting this type of personality to be helpful. Even when it’s seemed like it would be cathartic for myself, it just dug deeper. Of course everyone’s experience may vary.

    For sure, I wouldn't bother confronting her. It won't change anything and will only serve to engage you further into her narrative. 

    • Like 1
  9. On 1/7/2021 at 8:23 AM, Homeschool Mom in AZ said:

    Beware of Western culture's delusion that you have to prioritize one relationship (spouse) over another (kids.) Instead, remember there's no valid reason not to see them as equally important while at the same time seeing that they're different and often separate.   It's like being a Christian-there's no valid reason to put our relationship with God the Father over God the Son or God the Holy Spirit.  They're all equally important and deserve equal attention and relationship even though they are each different from each other.  Hierarchical  thinking is appropriate at times, but not in this context. Your children will only be with you a short time is a reason to prioritize them equally with your spouse because they'll be gone so soon and then that window will close, and you should prioritize your spouse equally because that's who you're with your entire marriage, even after the kids are launched.

    I think western culture's emphasis (especially mom culture) is to prioritize the kids over the husband. The general drift always seems to be in that direction. Dh and I work with a lot of couples and families and I truly cannot recall a single time that I've witnessed an unhealthy prioritizing of the marriage over the children. However, I have seen countless couples faltering under the prioritization of the children over the marriage. Countless. 

    So, I think when people say "prioritize the marriage" what they're saying is "don't neglect the marriage." 

    • Like 2
  10. On 1/7/2021 at 2:46 PM, alisoncooks said:

    Thanks for all the great ideas/thoughts. 


    I can see why you feel the way you do. My suggestion would be to 1) be willing to spend a little money, 2) be willing to not bring the kids, 3) be willing to eat out. *What* you can do is actually endless. I do think it would be good to invite him to be the planner while you try to be the enthusiastic passenger. I think your main job right now is to embrace the idea and not put obstacles up. 


    ETA: I want to clarify the be willing to eat out. It's not that food has to be involved but it is that it's a pretty convenient obstacle if you eliminate it from the options. I think you should challenge yourself to not put up obstacles.

    • Like 2
  11. Dh and I are big, big fans of date night. I have no problems leaving my kids home while we go out. For dh and I, this is one way we nurture our relationship. Of course, there are many ways to accomplish this, but for us, dedicated time together as a couple is a cornerstone. Having older teens and young adult children, I can also say with all confidence that those kids leave and don't look back. They build their own lives, separate from yours (as they should), and what you are left with is your marriage. So, date night or not, IMO you have to find some space for the marriage to flourish in the absence of the children.

    Logistics-wise? Indeed, right now it's pretty scarce. We do a lot of coffee runs. Just driving in a car together, grabbing coffee, and going back home gives us a chance to connect. When dining was open we did a few outdoor dinners. One time we thought the kids were both going to be out for the evening so we ordered our favorite restaurant and picked up a bottle of wine for home, but then one kid came home early 😂. I think we've pretty much given up on trying to pull that one off. In non-covid times my favorite thing to do is a long dinner, followed by sitting at the bar for another drink. Something about unhurried drinks is so good for letting our conversations get deep and meander into topics that we don't usually get to in day-to-day living.


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  12. 49 minutes ago, BeachGal said:

    Iirc, Pfizer is creating the same vaccine which doesn't require the extreme refrigeration.

    As a business move, I think it's necessary.

    I was a little nervous about the mRNA technology at first but now I'm pretty excited about the simplicity and adaptability of it. I think this will be an important tool for humanity.

    • Like 6
  13. 4 hours ago, MercyA said:

    We had a very militant atheist here at one time who invariably steered nearly every conversation to her views on religion and used the same type of arguments repeatedly. I believe she was banned at one point. (Who remembers when people used to get banned? This forum is positively TAME compared to how it used to be!) When she came back with a new username I was pretty sure it was her. I didn't say anything, though, until she described her eyes as "beady"--the same way she described them when using her previous username. 

    Watch those little details, peeps, if you want to stay undercover! 🙂 

    She was so bad that I started an iPhone note with the titles of her threads. They were always incredibly anti-Christian. I just deleted it recently when I was purging my phone. That was allowed to go on for way too long.

    • Like 1
  14. On 1/6/2021 at 2:21 PM, sassenach said:

    Got the Moderna vaccine this morning. Not painful at all going in. I’m having some mild joint pain. My arm feels normal sore. 

    Day 3 update: The joint pain increased to moderate on day one, decreased to mild on day 2, and is so far gone on day 3. Arm pain was pretty bad yesterday and limited my range of motion but is about 80% better today. I've been taking Tylenol on and off, though I'm not sure it makes a huge difference. 

    So that's about it! It'll be interesting to see the difference for my second shot. 

    • Like 12
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