[Help me find shoes that don't hurt my feet]

Kurus saved my feet. I'm a nurse and my former go-to shoe (Alegria) changed something and all of a sudden my feet hurt all the time. I wear Quantums because the wide toe box really works with my feet. When I get home, I switch to Oofos slides, which feel great after a long day.

[Word-of-the-year and Phrase-of-the-Year people: recap and looking forward]

3 hours ago, Lady Florida. said:

As we get closer to the end of the year I've been spending more time thinking about my WotY for 2024. Next year is going to be a big travel year for us. We have a group cruise with friends right at the start (Jan 6th). I'm almost done planning our trip to the UK (mostly England and maybe Edinburgh) for late spring. We're also looking at booking a New England & Canada cruise in the fall. 

Any ideas for a travel related word that could also apply to other aspects of life? Journey and Explore are the most obvious and I might have to choose one of them. If anyone has another word that would fit I'm open to suggestions.

Awe? Wonder? To me, the best part about travel is being blown away by the new sights and experiences. 

[“Emperor of Maladies” how readable?]

His prose is beautiful and it's very engaging, but it is LONG and possibly too dense for a 7th grader. I listened to it on audio, am an oncology nurse, and still needed to come up for air sometimes. I wonder if his newer book, Song of the Cell (?), might be a better topic. It still touches on cancer but it's not solely about cancer. 

[What do you think BFE means?]

48 minutes ago, TechWife said:

What? Are you serious? I thought it meant watching shows & maybe snacks 

First it was the tiny reindeer, now this. What a day. 

Funny homeschooler goes to public school story for you all. When dd was in her first year of PS, she was with a group of friends and the topic of her caring for her older brother with cerebral palsy came up. Her friend asked her what they did and she said, "Netflix and chill." She realized immediately that the horrified looks on everyone's faces meant she didn't know the full connotation of the phrase 😂. She fessed up and they were all relieved/taught her what it meant. She came home with a good story.

[I want to rearrange my living room...]

1 hour ago, sweet2ndchance said:

I found a rug that I LOVE and would go perfect with the furniture we have. What size should I get to go with the layout that sgo95 posted?

https://www.homedepot.com/p/StyleWell-Blue-Tile-Geo-6-ft-x-8-ft-Area-Rug-22766/318624165

The largest. Biggest mistake people make is going too small with area rugs.

[What do you think BFE means?]

13 hours ago, Murphy101 said:

“Bum f-ing Eg**t as in, it’s so far out there that it’s like going into the desert and taking 40 years to find civilization again.”

 

 

Yes, that's what I've always understood it to mean. Except in my head it's butt instead of bum. I've known that saying my whole life. And certainly, anyone who's been around the military would know it, too. It's weird to me that a group of adults wouldn't be familiar with it but what do I know, I'm a Californian.

[I want to rearrange my living room...]

The not-to-scale-ness of the floor plan is kind of messing me up, but if the room is at least 16' wide, that sofa should be able to come off the wall and be more centered in the room. Which way it faces would depend on preference but you might even be able to add a chair or 2 facing back toward the sofa and create a little seating area. Can you post photos of the room?

[The cake came - update in first post. Was Don't make your presents a burden JAWM]

(((Hugs))) My dad is like this. He has multiple times just showed up to surprise us (he lives 8 hours away). He once took a bus in while I was in the middle of a full day of school (college) and I had to make him wait for hours at the bus stop. It made me feel terrible and resentful. 

[Relentlessly cheerful audio books for my bird :)]

18 hours ago, klmama said:

Would YouTube work?  Ms Rachel is extremely cheerful.  

You stole my answer!

[Do elderly people get mean or is it me?]

There's a lot of suffering with aging, especially in the last stretch. I'm witness to a lot of people suffering in general because of the type of work I do. My observation is that whatever baseline coping skills a person has become really obvious. Some people are very sweet in their suffering, some lash out, some sit in their sadness, some get controlling. I think it's the same with aging. The filter is gone and you start to see what foundational coping mechanisms the person has. And when I think of myself when I'm sick/suffering/worn out/hurting I am aware that I also get worn thin and maybe a little less patient.

My personal experience is that FIL remained fairly easy going, but with abundant opinions about everything/everyone around him (which was all very much in character) and he lost a TON of self-control, which I think was due to ongoing mini strokes/brain decline. My grandfather, always a worrier, became more of an Eeyore at the end. My grandmother, who had significant dementia, did become mean but she was always a little spicy. Everyone stayed themselves, but not their best selves.

[I guess we will find out how effective the COVID booster is, sample size of one]

My coworker just got covid for the third time this year (never before had she caught it)! She gets all the boosters. I think it's all a crap shoot at this point.

[Beard balm for dh]

My husband uses BeardBrand. He got fragrance samples and had me pick it out. I like "Old Money."

[Future Trip To Louisiana]

5 hours ago, saraha said:

Almost a year later, but this girlfriends trip might happen in January! I’m so excited! It will take a lot of work on my driving kids part, but it might actually happen! 
 

Definitely open to more suggestions!

I'm a dope and didn't read down far enough. Which city did you decide on?

[Future Trip To Louisiana]

Thinking more, don't discount Mardi Gras *if* you don't travel to NO. Mardi Gras in Lafayette might be super fun. It's really a family event outside of the French Quarter. ALSO, if you're into the music BeauSoleil (legendary LA band) is having their 50th anniversary celebration in early Feb in Lafayette.

[Future Trip To Louisiana]

On 1/7/2023 at 12:31 PM, katilac said:

I live in the New Orleans metro area (15 minutes from the city/French Quarter), and my dad is as Cajun as they come (did not learn English until he went to school). 

While you will certainly encounter Cajun food and culture in NOLA, I would consider a trip to the Lafayette area instead, if that interest is the driving force. Flights may be more complicated, but the Lafayette area is the center of Acadiana. It's about 2 1/2 hours from NOLA, with lots to do and see. Cajun Fest is in October, and is a definite experience musically and culturally. 

Places like Thibodeaux that are closer to NOLA, like an hour, also have an intense Cajun culture, but I can't in good conciseness recommend that anyone spend their vacation in Thibodeaux  not tell you that it will have far fewer things to do. (dodges a hit from my cousins in Thibodeaux)

Having said that, the Cajun presence is certainly strong in NOLA, and it is the winner for exploring sub-cultures, seeing historical sites, and having a wider variety of things to do. New Orleans School of Cooking is indeed a lot of fun, and you could go two different times for different meals if you wish. You often have to book this ahead of time. 

Culture-wise, the definition of 'Creole' is all over the map. There is a lot of cross-over in traditions, with Creole culture having strong Caribbean and Spanish influences in addition to Cajun. Edited to add that Creole food has more tomato-based dishes than Cajun food does.

Food-wise, they can be quite similar, with Creole being the city mouse and Cajun being the country mouse, lol. If a restaurants says it serves Creole food, it is going to be more sophisticated than a restaurant that says it serves Cajun food. 

Eh, I'd aim for best weather. I live here, and how pretty it is has never occurred to me as a selling point, lol. It's, um, green in late spring, yep. And the azaleas that abound are a beautiful sight, but we are really not known for lovely scenery.  

October and April are the best bets anywhere in Louisiana, May is a runner-up, but honestly, it can be hot as hell at almost any given time. October is still hurricane season, but generally calm. Calm-ish. As calm as it gets. If you have experienced Orlando weather, you have pretty much experienced Louisiana weather. There is plenty to do inside in both the NOLA and Lafayette areas, 

Absolutely do not come in July, August, or September. 

I second October and April. I gave birth in early May in NOLA. When I was admitted the weather was beautiful, but at discharge 3 days later we were in satan's armpit. 

I always enjoyed wandering the French Quarter and Garden District. Buy some street art in Jackson Square, walk through the french market. Ask the locals where to eat.

[Quick and Hearty Soup Recipe?]

Tuscan chicken soup. If you get the precut veggies at trader joes, the whole first part is done for you.

•  
• 2 cups shredded rotisserie chicken
• 1 medium yellow onion medium dice
• 4 carrots peeled, washed, and medium dice
• 4 stalks celery washed and medium diced
• 2 zucchini washed and medium diced
• 3 cloves fresh garlic chopped finely
• 1 tsp dried oregano
• 1 tsp dried basil
• 2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
• 28 can crushed tomatoes
• 6 cups chicken stock
• Kosher salt-to taste
• Fresh ground black pepper -to taste
• ¹⁄₂ cup farro

Directions

In a large pot add 2 tbsp olive oil and saute onions, celery, and carrots over medium high heat for 8-10 minutes. Add zucchini and garlic. Saute until tender about 4-6 minutes.

Add chicken stock, tomatoes, basil, oregano, chicken. Simmer soup for 20 minutes, vegetables should be tender. Add the farro and cook right in the soup for another 10 minutes. Season with salt and pepper. Allow to simmer for 6-8 minutes.

Top with grated parmiggiano reggiano or pecorino romano cheese and serve!

 

 

[Will my child be scarred for life?]

You could get a lot of this in one trip to target’s dollar section. I would find a way to participate in at least a few days. He’s brand new to the school. As annoying as it is, his psychological experience of fitting in matters quite a bit and is probably worth 20 bucks and a little bit of time. 

[Favorite citation generator? Most common style for citations?]

MyBib was my favorite when I was in school. It had the formats I needed and no ads.

[Has anyone bought a Ruggable recently?]

I have read many reviews about how Ruggables don't lay flat after washing. Supposably, they fixed this issue. I'm wondering if they actually accomplished that goal. They have a lot of styles I like, and with my dogs, it would be great to have a washable rug, but not if it looks bad after washing. Thanks for any input!

[If you are a parent with kids in activities, how is the best way to get in touch with you?]

My husband taught me this- never answer these questions with the information. Instead, answer them by referring back to the original message. "Hi! That info can be found in the text sent out this morning!" Copy-paste. You have to train people to use the communication avenues that you have set in place. I found this to be a universal truth in everything I have ever lead. No matter how perfect and easy and clear the communication is, you will inevitably be asked questions you've already answered. 

[Why is it so hard to buy a nice sweater for my daughter?]

I adore Quince! Their quality is fantastic. I have the cotton Boyfriend sweater in 2 different colors and sizes. It runs oversized. If you size down, it will be more cropped (but not really too cropped).  I also have the cotton fisherman sweater in ivory, which has already been a staple this season. This alpaca sweater is so detailed and gorgeous but definitely more on the delicate side. The cotton sweaters are well-constructed and wash without incident in the delicate cycle. I will probably own everything they make by the time I'm done.

 

DM me your email addy if you'd like a $20 off referral code!

[Anyone on very low dose beta blockers?]

I had an ablation for SVT more than a decade ago. Over time my symptoms have occasionally popped up but overall it was very effective. I’m terrible at taking daily meds and the SVT was quite bad at the time. 

[S/O childhood home]

19 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said:

I mentioned in that post how sentimental I am about my childhood home. It made me reflect on why I get sentimental about houses. I lived in my childhood home since day 1 and moved out when I married dh at 18. We have lived in our current house our whole marriage. I’ve lived in exactly 2 houses my whole life.
 

How many different places have you lived?

I've lived in 17 homes/apartments (3 states). The 4 major homes that I've lived in were my childhood home for 13 years, the first home dh and I owned for 5 years, a home we rented for 8 years, and our current home, which we've owned for 6 years. But the home I am by far the most sentimental about and still deeply miss is my grandparent's home. It was my one constant. That home has been gone (sold) for 5 years now and I could still cry about it if I sat here thinking about it for too long.

[What is the hardest number of kids to have?]

I found going from 1 to 2 to be pretty stressful and then again from 3 to 4. Three was actually a breeze. There are so many contributing factors, I’m not sure there is an objective answer to this question. 

[Need Perspective - Friendship Breakup (AITA)]

It kind of sounds like you are the one relationship where she can be in the power seat and take the role of accuser. In my observation, emotionally abusive relationships often involve the abuser accusing the partner of infractions, putting them in the role of apologizing and taking responsibility for the toxic dynamic. She's flipping the script. The healthiest thing for you to do is to model what she hasn't been able to do in her own relationships- boundaries. It's not ok to persecute a person for something that happened 30 years ago. It's not ok to emotionally lash out and then blame the other person. Unforgiveness is not a feature of a healthy relationship.