Praying for y'all. We applied for jobs at Heather's school in Malaysia a couple of years ago, interviewed twice, but then they hired someone else. I was SO sad. Bill was hired soon after that for a position in Raleigh, NC, which is where we are from originally. So, rather than moving halfway around the world, we moved back home. We're enjoying being with grandparents, cousins, and siblings, but I still think about what life would be like if we were in Malaysia. And, I've been looking for a position for six months now. I have applied and interviewed for quite a few jobs. I have one offer that I'm not crazy about, but had a second interview for a position I would love this past Monday. I'll find out on Monday whether or not I will be offered the position I would love. If I am, I'll take it. But if not, I'll accept the other position. The whole process is draining and humbling. If you think about it, I'd love your prayers for me too! Take care, and keep us updated!

Joanne, take a look at my post and let me know if there's a way I can give you credit. Here's the link: http://www.cindyfinley.com/2012/11/bean-dip-anyone.html Thanks!

Joanne, I have this content: I've found new moms often confuse boundaries and trying to convince someone of the *rightness* of their choices. The best thing is to assert your boundary and *not* try to defend your choice. Some family and close friend help..... First, I learned early on that most of my choices were on a "need to know" basis. Most people don't "need to know". If asked "how is the baby sleeping?" Answer: Great! Thanks for asking! Want some bean dip? "Are you sure you should be picking her up every time she cries?" Answer:"Yes! Thank you! Want some bean dip?" "When do you plan to wean" Answer: "When she's ready. Thanks! Want some bean dip?" Now, with some people you will need to set *firm* boundaries. They will need to be backed up with action (like hanging up, leaving the room or even the event). If it's a pattern of intrusion, for example. Practice kind but firm responses: "I know you love us and the baby. We are so glad. Our sleeping choices have been researched and made. I will not discuss it again" Also, don't confuse setting boundaries with trying to convince someone of the rightness of your choices. New AP moms often struggle with this. The boundary is that no one else has a right to tell you how to parent and create a hostile environment. You set boundaries by doing the above. Where new moms often invite problems is by citing authors, studies and sites to "defend" themselves. Each time you do so, you create more time for discussion and rebuttal and send the message that your decisions are up for debate. Don't defend your choices beyond generalities, and then only once or twice. "The doctor is in support of our choices. Want some bean dip?" Finally, look them in the eye and say simply "I want us to have a good relationship. I want you to *enjoy* the baby. I'll parent the baby - you enjoy them. Let's not discuss this anymore. If you bring it up, I will leave the room." Would you mind if I use the idea in a blog post I'm writing? I'd love to give you credit. What would be the best way for me to do that so that you feel honored but that your privacy is not compromised?

Melissa, that would be great. I looked for Joanne's blog and couldn't find it. Is it still around? My email address is cynthiafin at gmail dot com. Thank you!!!

Do you know the story of the origin of this most excellent response to snarky and intrusive comments? I tried a search but couldn't find it. I'm wondering if it was way, way back on the earlier board...

YES!

Checking in here was the first thing I did when I got up this morning. How's are you doing? How is your family and community? Do you and yours need prayer? Oh, and, if you don't mind, please give your location, at least generally so that we know where you are.

ZooRho, thanks SO much. She just called and is safely there. I am following the news too. Thanks for the links!

I hear it's sleeting in Central VA. Who else is getting snow, sleet, etc.?

Okay, so Sara Maria is getting ready to leave C-ville to head back to Newport News. CNU remains closed, but she has a friend who has a house right near the college with a bed for her. This is one of the reasons. She had a miserable night on the floor of her sister's dorm room. Also, the catering company she works for helps with disaster relief, and she wants to do that. Mostly, I think she just wants to get back. I understand, although I wish she would stay in C-ville. And, I don't think it's going to be too bad there in Newport News... Those in the Newport News area, what do you think? TIA!

Pondering this, and then realized I was having trouble getting my head around the idea because I've had a front-loading washing machine for ~ 12 years.

Thank you!!! :)

Losing water is the worst. In C-ville, we were on well water and so losing power was a challenge. One winter we lost it for about five days and literally hauled water up from the creek to flush potties. Ugh. Being without power is sort of fun for about 24 hours, I think. But after that, it gets old, old, old.

They did make all the kids leave. They seem to have more problems with flooding on campus than anything else. So, I'm guessing that's why. I think the William and Mary kids are staying put. And, thanks for the local paper and news station!

:( :( :( So sorry!

:) And bzymom, where are you getting your updates? And most importantly, do you have wine in the house? If not, hie thee to the grocery store pronto Squanto before the wind kicks up!

Not surprised that Albemarle is holding out ... Thank you! Sara Maria was getting some water, but is pretty much just planning on cozying up with her sis. If they get in a bind, I will get in touch!

Popping in for a little check-in with WTM gals on the East Coast. My oldest daughter has been evacuated from Christopher Newport University in Newport News, VA. I love this quote from CNUAlert: "Make sure you have the textbooks and other academic materials you’ll need…you’ll still have assignments due upon your return...Don’t make the mistake of thinking of this as a “Hurri-cation.”" She's heading to C-ville to stay with her sis at UVA. Glad they'll be together, but I do wish they were with us in NC. I don't think that they'll feel too much, but for you gals in the NE corridor, please keep us updated, as you're able.

:)

What would it be like to have him get his GED and basically just go his own way. Let him live with you, if he is working or taking classes. But, if he's working, he needs to contribute something for room and board. My concern is that if you hold his hand through graduation, he's going to have to learn at a later date, with greater potential consequences, what life as he would design it actually looks like. My thinking is that he needs to go ahead and catch this vision.

Thank you!!! The WTM family was SUCH a critical part of our journey to bring Katya home. And, keep praying, but also keep your eyes open for other ways to care for orphans. I'm guessing your already doing this. :)

Me too. I still pull out her picture from time to time ... There are so many children stuck in the system. The ones who can be adopted are called "pure" orphans, and the ones, like Polina, who have guardians somewhere in the picture, or paperwork that will never be signed, or other issues that will keep them institutionalized, are called "social" orphans. :( :( :(

Her name was Polina, and no she didn't. Her father disappeared without signing documents and so she is most likely stuck in the institutional system until she "graduates." But the good news is that the family that wanted to host and then adopt Polina hosted and adopted another girl, and then another, and another, and is now working to bring home a sibling pair. Thanks for asking!

Totally agree!

Thanks for the encouragement, ladies. And I was supposed to be encouraging you! I won't be a stranger; just not in so often. :)