Of course it's going to be any of our business as parents if our teenagers get pregnant. But I'm not really sure what you are saying. Do you think that a teen who wants to be sexually active is going to decide not to be because you read her text messages or emails and say "ah ha, I caught you talking about it!"? Heck no. A teen who wants to have sex is going to have sex. Whether they are secretive about it or open about it is another story. But if they want to have sex, they're having sex. So you can react how...? You can punish them for writing about it in a text or email that you find while snooping (but seriously? I just don't see that going over well or stopping anything except their being open with you). Or you can have an open conversation with them about it and provide birth control etc knowing that they've made their choice. And the alternative is....what...? Grounding them forever? Keeping them locked in the house forever? At 17? At so close to legal adult age? I just can't see reacting that way. If they are SO ridiculously sheltered at 17, what if they decide to go to college or move out at 18 and have all that freedom you never gave them and then what? They're going to go crazy. I am trying to imagine an 18 year old leaving for college or deciding to move in with a friend, who just last year was grounded for WEEKS for a late night PHONE CALL and wondering what type of "freedom" that teen will gorge herself on then now that she's away from Mommy and Daddy, and it's kind of frightening to think about, really!

ebay alibris.com thriftbooks.com borders.com barnesandnoble.com paperbackswap.com The library and their interlibrary loan program, yard sales, thrift stores and used book sales are always good places to find books, too. And any local bookstore you have would probably be willing to order anything you want for you. Amazon has cheap used books when you look at the base price but personally I always thought their shipping charges were expensive anyway.

Meriwether, That's a good point! I will keep it in mind (and pay attention to whether that continues to be a pattern for me). Thanks for pointing it out!

I LOVE grilled cheese sandwiches, and potato soup sounds yummy! I just made stuffed peppers, they're in the oven now. Lean ground beef seasoned with salt, pepper, garlic, onion powder and Italian seasoning, mixed with rice, a few beaten eggs and Italian bread crumbs, American cheese, tomato sauce, parmesan cheese, and some frozen corn kernels, all stuffed into some green bell peppers. I'm starving already but they'll be another hour!

^yeah, "How To Eat Fried Worms" is a good one! Also maybe "Chocolate Fever" and "Peter Pan." Did anyone say "The Chronicles Of Narnia" yet? And he might also enjoy the "Choose Your Own Adventure" books.

I've used that one in the past except in my case it was: Something you want, something you need, something I want for you, something to read. :) :lol::lol::lol::lol:

I have to say it: Mostly, I'm just shocked...seriously...that a 17 year old, who is VERY nearly a legal adult, is GROUNDED for TWO WEEKS just because she talked to somebody on the phone at 11:30 PM. That sounds like some serious overkill/micromanaging. And while it's not fun to think about the fact that teens, and especially YOUR teens (general you) have an interest in sex... they do. I was several years younger than your daughter (unfortunately) when I had sex for the first time. (And I was 18 when I gave birth to my oldest daughter). I think it's okay to let a teen in your house know that you will periodically check their emails/texts/etc for their safety, and then to do that now and then, and then to open up a line of communication if you discover something unsettling. But to randomly snoop on a teen you didn't have reason to distrust was kind of asking for trouble. Now that you found stuff... I don't know. I'd talk to her, I guess, and tell the truth, and say I'm sorry I snooped, but this was why, and this was what I found, and this is how I felt about it, and this is what we need to do about it (which might involve birth control, might involve a heart to heart conversation about a combination of morals, safety/health, and privacy issues and so on), might involve some closer monitoring for a while and so on). But "punishment" per se? No. Expecting a teen to be open and honest with you about things like this when they ARE so easily punished, especially in their late teens, for things like talking on the phone past a certain time? Not going to happen. Just my two cents! ETA: And no, I would not tell the parents of the other girl. I would not consider that my business, not at age 17. If she was ANY younger I just might feel differently but 17 on... no, I really don't think I would feel that was my place.

Does complaining about how the turkey is still partly frozen inside and will undoubtedly take longer to cook than we anticipated count? Other than that (and doing the traditional meal with family) I can't think of anything else lol.

You know how many adults like to fantasize, sometimes, about what they'd do with the money if they won the lottery? I think it's kind of like that. It's one time of the year where they can imagine what it would be like if they had more toys than they knew what to do with, and to do some imaginary shopping picking them out, and then hoping that they get at least some of them. I can still remember being a kid and a big holiday edition of a Toys R Us catalog or some such coming to our house and my brothers and I sitting on the couch oohing and aahing over it and taking turns picking what we wanted from each page and making our Hanukkah wish lists and so on. I think it's harmless and fun, especially if they understand they can't really have EVERYTHING on their list.

I used to, years ago. They ARE adorable and fun, no doubt- but the stink was awful. Those things go to the bathroom what seems like every five minutes. Even if you clean the cage EVERY.SINGLE.DAY (and truthfully, who wants to/has time to do THAT? Not me!), it will still stink by the end of the day.

I don't celebrate Christmas. :P So... Other.

Do you think he might like Coraline?

Today was my Week 11 weigh in: Status Report: 8/26/10, Week "0" Weight: 237 1/2 lbs BMI: 37.2 Height: 5'7" 9/2/10, Week 1 Weight: 235 1/2 lbs BMI: 36.9 Weekly Change: -2 lbs Total Loss: 2 lbs 9/9/10, Week 2 Weight: 234 1/2 lbs BMI: 36.8 Weekly Change: -1 lb Total Loss: 3 lbs 9/16/10, Week 3 Weight: 231 3/4 lbs BMI: 36.3 Weekly Change: -2 3/4 lbs Total Loss: 5 3/4 lbs 9/23/10, Week 4 Weight: 229 1/2 lbs BMI: 35.9 Weekly Change: -2 1/4 lbs Total Loss: 8 lbs (I'm out of the 230's!!!) 9/30/10, Week 5 Weight: 226 3/4 lbs BMI: 35.5 Weekly Change: -2 3/4 lbs Total Loss: 10 3/4 lbs 10/7/10, Week 6 Weight: 226 1/4 lbs BMI: 35.5 Weekly Change: -1/2 lb Total Loss: 11 1/4 lbs 10/14/10, Week 7 Weight: 224 1/2 lbs BMI: 35.2 Weekly Change: -1 3/4 lbs Total Loss: 13 lbs 10/21/10, Week 8 Weight: 221 1/4 lbs BMI: 34.6 Weekly Change: -3 1/4 lbs Total Loss: 16 1/4 lbs 10/28/10, Week 9 Weight: 218 lbs BMI: 34.1 Weekly Change: -3 1/4 lbs Total Loss: 19 1/2 lbs (I'm out of the 220's!!!) 11/4/10, Week 10 Weight: 219 1/2 lbs BMI: 34.4 Weekly Change: +1 1/2 lbs Total Loss: 18 lbs 11/11/10, Week 11 Weight: 218 1/4 lbs BMI: 34.1 Weekly Change: -1 1/4 lbs Total Loss: 19 1/4 lbs Summary: Goal- to lose 58 lbs. 19 1/4 lbs down, 38 3/4 lbs to go. --- Soooo.... I didn't TOTALLY take off that 1 1/2 lb gain I had last week (why does it go on so much faster than it comes off?!), but there's only 1/4 lb of that gain left, and I'm still down over 19 lbs overall, so, I'm getting there! --- Check out my fun weight loss picture updates here: http://nancextoo.livejournal.com/139113.html Thanks again for your support and encouragement, all!

Hmm...that is a good observation and interesting that I seem to slow down every four weeks... but also interestingly, that hasn't even been around my 'time of month' which is what you might think, right? (I'm assuming that was what you meant?) Week 2 of my diet was on 9/9 and and Week 6 was on 10/7, but my time of month didn't start til the 22nd and the 23rd on those months. So it's not even right before or during, it's more like right midway between cycles, which is kind of weird! Sorry if that was TMI lol. Results post to follow in a minute or two.

Here is the response I received to my email: Thank you for your inquiry----All secondary students attend the circle discussions on a weekly basis. Circles are a great forum for students of different levels to participate in discussions. Each student has the same opportunity to participate in the discussion and has input on future topics. Discussion topics in the circle activities are designed to introduce students to one another and involve school topics. We have used such topics as what is your favorite sport, tell about your favorite vacation, etc. We have also spent a large portion of our time discussing topics such as bullying and related topics. Depending on the input and participation of the students in the circles, the discussions can lead into the abuse issues mentioned in the letter. Each circle is moderated by a teacher, social worker, or member of the administration who is trained in using circles for effective communication. There are also at least three other staff members in each circle. I can assure you that the staff members present have the best interest of the students in mind and will not allow any conversation that may harm the students in any way. I have included the website for Restorative Practice that might be helpful, as well as our agenda for Circles tomorrow. Secondary Circle November 12, 2010 Agenda Moderators can choose to elaborate on topics that may come up during circles. 1. Introductory go around. Give your name, classroom, and favorite food (or use another brief topic). 2. Talk about how your week was, one good thing that happened, one not so good thing that happened. If you could, would you change anything? 3. If you won the lottery, what is the first thing you would do? 4. If time permits, touch on bullying in school. There has been a story of a high school freshman on the local news who killed himself due to bullying. Stress what to do if you are being bullied. 5. Ask for feedback on last week’s team building activities. 6. Closing go around. Any quick question that encourages participation will work. --- ...Thoughts...?

I actually weigh in again tomorrow morning and will be giving an official update then! I've been back on track most of this week, except for a little bit of cheating Saturday night (I had pizza and a mixed drink with my sister-in-law when she came by to visit heh) and on Sunday (it was my son's birthday). But the rest of the week I've done well, and I worked out a few times... I'm not expecting a huge loss this week but I should lose something, and I plan to just keep plugging away! Thanks for checking in with me, and I'll update again sometime tomorrow. :)

A to Z Mysteries? The Hardy Boys? Almost anything by Roald Dahl? Encyclopedia Brown? Some of the age-appropriate Judy Blume books featuring male characters?

Well, I was curious after your post, so I looked on B&N to see if they had the 2002 title and they didn't. There were a couple of other books by that author but all of them said something about "a new copy is not available from barnes and noble.com at this time" or some such. The one mentioned here wasn't listed at all.

Thanks... :) I emailed them and expressed my thoughts/concerns/questions etc, so we will see what they say! I do agree that issues like these are important to address to some extent- I just want to make sure they will be dressed in a developmentally appropriate manner! Especially some of the more sensitive ones like various types of abuse, which can be much more disturbing to and confusing for a kid than, say, "peer pressure" or "high school cliques."

:iagree:

Crazy, isn't it?

Yep. And already done.

From a special needs school your child attends? "This school year we are continuing the Restorative Practice approach when dealing with issues at (school). Part of the approach includes engaging students in a weekly circle discussion. During this circle time, students are encouraged to participate in discussing a chosen topic. At times, the discussion topics may include, but are not limited to, bullying, high school cliques, gender issues, alcohol and drug use and abuse, physical/sexual/mental abuse. Periodically, we will be utilizing multimedia (videos/DVD/CDs) to show scenarios depicting these sensitive issues." There's more but that's the gist of it. My daughter is 18... but not a "normal" 18. This is a special education/special needs/life skills type of setting. She does work at like a second grade level. Socially, emotionally, mentally, developmentally etc, she's nowhere near her "real" age. Without getting to preview exactly what they'll be showing on these videos, without knowing what direction they will take talks about things like sexual, physical and mental abuse (which can be disturbing to say the least, and I would not want it to be more than my daughter could really understand and/or emotionally handle), I am feeling somewhat uncomfortable with this. This isn't a permission slip or anything, it's just an FYI kind of letter and at the end it says "If you need more information or have any questions, please contact so and so." What would you think....? Am I over-reacting a bit to worry some about this?

Stuff like that, I'd see what they were going for used on places like ebay or Amazon or Craig's List and then maybe make it a bit cheaper than that.

I didn't mean to offend you (or anyone else), and yes, I'm sure that there are individual circumstances out there where a mother makes that choice for the well-being of the kids or has a good reason or whatever, I'm not judgmental and/or naive enough to assume it's ALWAYS otherwise- -but AS a mother, I cannot imagine ever living without MY children and so I would not be able to help but wonder about a woman who lives in a different state from her own children (and in this case particularly in conjunction with the rest of the story)!