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Slipper

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Posts posted by Slipper

  1. Any suggestions for me? I finally received my grandmother's cedar chest from my Dad. Inside, in a bit of a jumble, were many things. Several of my dad's baby clothes and (I think) my grandmother's baby clothes. The most beautiful thing inside were vintage valentine cards with real ribbons and fabric that my Dad had sent to my grandmother and some from when she was a little girl and receiving them from my grandfather. There is also an all-cloth A,B,C book in excellent condition.

     

    I want to take the time to preserve them in some way - bag them up or put them in a scrapbook (which I'm not sure about, I don't want to damage them). There are many newspaper articles that I'd like to save.

     

    I'd also like to start storing our baby clothes, etc in the chest. That would free up space since we're not planning on storing blankets or anything in there. It would be like a memory chest or something similar.

     

    Any suggestions for me?

  2. Can you just deduct $4,000 from what you are paying them in order to pay the note off (noting in the closing paperwork that it was for a storm shelter allowance)? Then they keep the refund and it all would even out.

     

    It definitely sounds weird and I would ask a lawyer to represent you to make sure everything goes through on he up and up, especially after the snafu with the mortgage before.

     

    I sent an email asking that question but they said that I should talk to their lawyer about how much to pay. (He was asking me how much was left owing).

     

    At this point, I'm annoyed. I'm sitting here with the cash to pay it off and nobody seems interested. I'm getting a lawyer and will be making my monthly payment until AFTER the storm shelter is installed. My money can sit and grow interest while they figure it out.

     

    Plus, I'm amazed that I'm being told that I must close by the end of the month. I have signed nothing about closing by the end of the month. It's just weird.

  3. I am so frustrated at the moment. I've posted about our situation before, but the short story is that we bought our neighbor's home (who happened to be our aunt/uncle) and they moved to another state. We set up fairly high payments but they were possible for us to make. Due to some very generous in-laws and other factors, we received enough money to actually pay the blasted thing off in February. But, we couldn't pay it off because it somehow managed to legally be located on property that was in a mortgage for my mother/step-father.

     

    They finally un-did the mortgage snafu and everything was clear to sign next week.

     

    My aunt (who I swear is on drugs or medication or has simply lost her mind) sent an email detailing a few things that needed to happen before we sign. Most were simple things - she left a vase here that she wanted. The biggest thing was the storm shelter. The house (in tornado alley) doesn't have a storm shelter. All the land on our street qualified for storm shelters with a government refund of 75%. The original (verbal) agreement was that they would write the check for the storm shelter (4,000) and we would give them 1,000. They knew they would have to wait for the refund but would get the other 3,000 back. Since the storm shelter (and house) is still in their name, they are (legally) the only ones who can receive the refund.

     

    We are set to close next week, turning over a substantial (to me anyway) amount of money and they decided that we need to pay for the storm shelter and then they will send us the refund money when it comes back. The problem is that I don't have an extra 4,000 to do this. Plus, I have no guarantee they would send me the money when it came in (and, they are in poor health, if they die then the money would go to their estate, not me). In my opinion, we are giving them WAY more than 4,000 by paying it off and they should be happy to go ahead and honor their original agreement.

     

    Their lawyer called to discuss it with me and I told him that I could give them the bulk of the money next week, but if I had to pay for the storm shelter, it would be several months for me to come up with enough money to finish paying off the house.

     

    He told me that was not an option. When I asked why, he said that it would mess up the taxes (which I already pay for). I told him I didn't understand and he told me it was rather confusing, but we couldn't delay the closing for a few months.

     

    Now that I feel backed in a corner, (and being taken advantage of), I told him that I wasn't going to sign anything and we'd just continue making our monthly payments. (The money is drawing interest in the bank, so why not?). He said again that the closing had to happen, at the latest, by the end of the month. Since I really don't understand any of this, I told him I was getting my own lawyer to help me understand it.

     

    This should be SO simple. I only want to pay off the house (they hold the mortgage). It's of NO benefit to me to pay it off and every benefit to them. (There's no interest). Why do people need to make things complicated?

  4. I have a 2 yr old border collie who was a stray when we adopted him. We have never had him groomed, but he was looking very scruffy and shaggy. We live in the country, literally in the woods and he's an outside dog.

     

    I dropped him off to be groomed. I would say that he probably needs a lot of work, even though his fur will be groomed short.

     

    Because we live in an impoverished rural area, though many people like to receive tips, the actuality is that few do receive them. I always tips hairdressers and the server at pizza hut (the only sit down restaurant in town).

     

    I feel like I should tip the dog groomer, but I'm not sure how much. I can afford to tip, so the amount wouldn't be a problem, but I want something appropriate (and perhaps a little generous because our collie, while sweet, can be a bit active and hasn't been groomed in two years). Any suggestions? I have no idea what it will cost. I took him in for yearly shots and complete grooming.

     

    Thanks :)

  5. I sympathize. I have one who is very small for her age. Thankfully, as long as she has some growth (height/weight) each year, even if it's not enough to put her on the chart, our doctors are okay.

     

    They did run some tests to make sure that all was going well (other than celiac disease) and she's fine. She's just small.

  6. At the time (about 10 years ago), I attended a conference and bought the books there.

     

    My daughter attends public school. I use it to see where she's "at" and to help plan goals for the next year. I also use it when we have home therapists. It's not the main thing I use anymore, but it was very essential to us for many years.

  7. Thank you for all the suggestions. :) We have thought about a picture schedule (and no sons here, although I have two younger daughters) and will probably do that to help her. Currently, we take care of dressing her, so we're able to keep up with deodorant, bras, etc.

     

    Our neurologist has stressed that birth control will be important for our dd due to her being at a high risk for assault. He said he has unfortunately seen too many girls like our daughter become pregnant and parents who are left to make very hard decisions. We would definitely use a shot rather than a pill.

     

    Our main concern is whether her birth control will interact with her other medications. I'm trying to work on adjusting her medication now and we have an appointment in late June with a ped gyno.

  8. I'm not comfortable discussing this publicly. My daughter is low-functioning, but considered bright and able to learn things, especially in regards to routines. Does anyone else here have a disabled child and had to teach them about how to take care of their personal hygiene during their periods? (Changing pads, etc). If so, would you please private message me (or post publicly if you'd like, but I'll probably reply privately).

  9. Love the ABLLS. :) I bought it about ten years ago and still occasionally pull it out to get ideas for IEP's and home therapy. I believe the book/testing was about $100. Having someone test her will be more expensive, however, ABLLS was designed to be user friendly.

     

    I use the older version that is filled out by hand. I understand there is a newer computerized version, but I can only speak of the older one.

     

    There are a series of blocks (grids) to fill in to show what your child knows. It would take a few hours to fill it out originally, depending on the areas of need.

     

    For example, the first part of the vocal imitation section has:

    Task Objective - "The student will imitate a sound when you say, "Say ____".

    Question - "Can the student imitate sounds upon request?"

    Examples - No examples given for this objective.

    Criteria - 4 (squares) - readily and accurately imitates almost any sound, 3- 15 sounds, 2 - 5 sounds, 1 - 2 sounds

     

    You fill in the number of squares. As you fill it out, it becomes clear where the gaps are. By looking at the criteria, you know what your next objective should be. ABLLS focuses on taking baby steps (although progress goes quickly).

     

    Any other questions, feel free to message me. I think it's a great assessment and is tailored to each child individually.

  10. Make your own white sauce with chicken broth.

     

    Canned green beans and pimentos will be fine.

     

    On the Mayo, buy a new jar unless you use a squeeze bottle. Previously opened jars in glutenoid households are nearly always contaminated. Wiping your bread with the mayo and sticking the knife back in for more mayo is enough to make a celiac sick.

     

    :iagree:

     

    We keep separate butter, peanut butter and mayo. My daughter doesn't eat mayo, but we use it in things like chicken salad, etc. Double dipping will make her very ill.

  11. A friend of mine has a daughter (adopted from China who is 8 yrs old) who is recently diagnosed with MDC1A. She is looking for support forums and any information as she is struggling. They knew there would be physical problems when they adopted her (bilateral hip dislocation) but they didn't realize the extent. They have all fallen in love with this adorable little girl and are hurting.

     

    If any moms have any resources to share, I would appreciate it. And, if there's anything specific I can do for her, (other than the obvious), I would appreciate that information as well. Feel free to PM if preferred. :)

  12. Slipper, they still have "snack time" in 6th grade ps:). She will sometimes eat her snack, but not always. Also, she does not like to eat the school lunches at all. The problem is, when she packs a lunch to take to school, she barely eats it. She thinks that it doesn't taste right after sitting in a lunch bag with an ice pack. BTW, we are in the process of trying to find a good counselor or child psychologist to address other issues and anxieties, so I am hoping that will help with the eating too.

     

    I meant for her to have two snack times under the theory that lots of small fatty snacks might help. :) During the time of diagnosing my daughter, they wanted her to have three meals and four snacks a day. It was a bit insane.

     

    Depending on how the psychologist works out, it might be worth working with the cafeteria as well to have specific food cooked for her. That would be covered under a 504 plan as long as your doctor writes a note. Good luck :)

  13. Wow, that is small. My daughter will turn 11 in August and weighs 51 and is considered underweight. I'll be honest and tell you that I would want some testing to make sure that there are not other health concerns going on (celiac, cystic fibrosis, crohn's, etc).

     

    We used a product called scandi-shake (I don't sell it, but I liked it) to add some extra calories. You could also do that on a lesser scale with products like Instant Breakfast, etc added to milk. Milkshakes were fun for our whole family.

     

    I also keep her physically busy (soccer, karate, outside playing) on the theory that exercise should make her hungrier. :) I saw that your daughter is in public school, ask them if she can take a quick break during PE or some other class to fit in a small snack (trail mix with lots of nuts, like almonds) to get an extra snack in. If possible, extra time at lunch (and encouragement from the teacher to socialize less and eat more ;).

     

    Good luck! I hope you find what works for you. My daughter is simply small even with her celiac diagnosis, but our doctor did send her for bone scans (super easy) to make sure that this wouldn't affect her overall growth and puberty. I think a good GI pediatric doc would give you some peace of mind as to whether this is normal "for your child".

  14. You weren't abusing your child. You shouldn't have to defend yourself to a busybody with too much time on her hands. I doubt CPS will contact you, but you might want to get the house extra-clean just in case. And be very careful of every word you say if you do have to discuss the situation, because your words may get used against you.

     

    When things calm down for you, you might want to explore more efficient ways of getting kids to mind, but really, you've had all you can take today. Get some rest.

     

    I agree with the above. The only thing that bothers me is that if she had a friend with her, then you have TWO witnesses rather than ONE single crazy lady. It's possible they will take it seriously because it's two people. :grouphug:

     

    I would have the house clean and food in the pantry in case they look (they looked when my brother's house was investigated, granted, in their case the freezer was full of booze and the fridge full of moldy food).

     

    You may get a visit, but I don't think what you did was abuse and I'm sure they will see it the same way. :grouphug:

  15. Can she touch her chin to her chest and turn her head side to side (even if it hurts?) If she can, and has no fever, then is probably NOT more than a sore neck - any possibility she has whiplash? When we were in a collision years ago I had it and it was a long-lasting stiff, sore neck.

     

    If it hurts enough for her to ask to see a doctor, I'd take her in. She may well feel a bit better if she can be reassured by a professional that is is just a sore neck (and might listen more to a doctor saying to stay off the 'puter, etc. ;-)

     

    She can't completely touch it to her chest or turn it all the way left or right. Nor can she look at the ceiling. She has limited mobility in all directions.

     

    I want to stress that she isn't 'sickly' and her entire day is normal except in activities that involve her neck (she is a bit slower). I worried about meningitis but she has none of the symptoms (other than neck) and I would think she would at least have a fever. (Plus, it's been going on for seven days now).

     

    It does resemble whiplash, but I have no clue where it could have come from. The plan is still to take her in to our doctor if I can't get her much better today.

  16. My 10 yoDD has been complaining of neck pain and stiffness for several days (since last Monday actually). She woke up with her neck hurting and we thought she slept wrong. We have tried ice packs and heat packs (although I admit we're a bit lazy with it and not very consistent) and ibuprofen at night (which is when it bothers her the most). She has used pillows prior to the neck pain, but now sleeps flat on the bed since it's the most comfortable.

     

    She is asking to go to the doctor and I typically cave when they say the pain is so bad they want to see him. Before making the appointment tomorrow, I was hoping that some on here would have some ideas on things to try.

     

    I do plan to eliminate all computers/games today as I'm wondering if she's spent too much time hunched over an ipad/kindle and do ibuprofen for the entire day, rather than just night.

     

    She has no other problems, no sore throat, fever, headache, etc. I have let her continue phyical activities, including soccer on Tues night and karate on Wed night (although she participated a bit slower than usual).

     

    Any other ideas?

  17. So sorry you guys had to go through that!

     

    Taking into consideration everything you said, I would give her the benefit of the doubt and one more chance.

     

    You said you like her (aside from this issue that's come up), and that you don't have many friends and would prefer not to lose this one if possible.

     

    She did something inappropriate and she didn't take a hint well, but I think at this stage if it is your preference, it is okay to give her the benefit of the doubt, give her another chance, and nicely and tactfully lay your feelings on this matter on the line to her. And I DO think it's perfectly okay to do so in a private email to her via Facebook since you won't be seeing her again in person without your daughter there.

     

    Just something sort of casual sounding and to the point, something like, "Hi, I don't want this to cause any awkwardness between us but I do need to ask a favor of you that I wanted to mention before DD and I see you again next week. I need to ask that from now on you not bring up the subject of DD's homeschooling or anxiety issues etc to her or in front of her. I know that when we went to lunch last week your intentions were good when you discussed these things with her, but it really raised her anxiety levels to the point where she ended up feeling sick and tense for hours after we got home, and at her age, my parenting and educational decisions are just not the sort of thing I want to have critiqued or debated in front of her. I know you couldn't have realized the effect it would have and I know, again, that you had the best of intentions and didn't mean anything by it, but I just wanted to give you a heads up so that it doesn't become an issue again. I consider you a good friend and love to spend time with you and chat with you about just about anything else but just wanted to ask that we leave these particular matters off the table, especially around dd. Thanks so much for understanding and I'm looking forward to seeing you at the book sale next week".... or something like that.

     

    If she gives you a snippy response, or she disrespects you, and/or disrespects your request or your child and does something like this again AFTER you've spelled it out in no uncertain terms, then you KNOW she's no real friend and that she wasn't worth having as a friend anyway.

     

    Good luck, I hope that you find she was worth the effort and that it works out how you are hoping!

     

    Thank you. That was beautifully worded and I will probably use much of that wording. I will probably put a bit of distance between my friendship with her simply out of necessity. In my opinion, and she is well aware of my daughter's medical issues and it just seems like a funny thing to discuss with her and in front of her. I don't mind answering questions about homeschooling and I have heard some weird thing lately, but most people limit their questions to my daughter to be things like, "Do you like being at home now?" or "I bet you and your Mama are having lots of fun together during the day", etc. They don't ask her to add, read or do anything else of that nature.

  18. Yes and a parent should put in the work to communicate and help their children.

     

    I might be misunderstanding your tone, but please remember that my daughter has been very sick and had surgery less than three weeks prior to us withdrawing her from school. We were mid-way through January before the vomiting stopped. By February the stomach-aches were slowing down and we were able to stop some of her medication. The diarrhea only stopped two weeks ago and we discontinued the last of her medicine.

     

    I have put a huge amount of work into my daughter already. We have worked slowly, taken many breaks, given lots of reassurance and settled her down.

     

    My daughter LIKES "Ms Debra" and would have been distressed immediately if any confrontation had taken place during lunch. (And would have still had the symptoms afterward). She would have felt like she was to blame. She and I have already spoken about what happened and I told her that some people don't understand homeschooling and just smile politely when things like that happen.

     

    At this point, I am only now trying to take her to a new level of independence. All of the past few months have been spent on lots of comfort and reassurance. My 10 yoDD could learn how to politely disengage from the conversation. My littlest one is not there yet.

  19. At the very least you know not to leave her alone with your daughter for one second. I'm furious for you and your little girl.

     

    :grouphug: How is dd today?

     

    Thank you for asking, she is doing fine today. I told her we would just do art and reading today which makes for a fun Friday. :)

     

    The part of all of this that upsets me is that it was done towards her. Even in a smiling face and tone, the repeated wording that we need to get along with others makes me uncomfortable. She actually got along quite well with all her classmates and she was conversing comfortably with Debra until that point.

  20. I'd just give it some time, and when you see her in person, if it comes up again, simply touch her on the arm and smile like a tiger, and let her know clearly that the topic is off limits firmly.

     

    You don't have to go out of your way to be friends with this woman, whether or not she understands the insult and inappropriateness of the conversation says realms about her.

     

    Whether or not you feel the need to get it off your shoulders and square things up with her verbally is something only you can decide.

     

    Will you have more peace if you speak?

     

    Or just silently walk with a inner "thanks for the warning" and move on?

     

    Her daughter is friends with two of our daughters and we belong to several activities together. I will have more peace if I speak because I have a 'sense' that if I don't, it will encourage more discussions. I have a feeling that perhaps she's trying to help 'correct' dd's anxiety in a passive-aggressive way.

     

    It might be possible to quickly let her know that the comments were not good for my daughter and I would appreciate her keeping them to herself, during a quiet moment at the book fair.

     

    My personal belief is that dd might need medication for anxiety at some point, but I think she's too young, especially considering that homeschool solves the problem. My father's family has a great deal of anxiety (and a history of several suicides). I plan to address this anxiety with whatever is needed, as it is needed.

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