shanvan Posted November 30, 2012 Share Posted November 30, 2012 Don't know if anyone remembers the strange emails I posted about in this thread. Basically the mom of a new club member was continually emailing my Ds about an hour after he sent a reminder email about meeting & events. Her emails always stated that she was confused and did we have xyz meeting or event that my Ds clearly sent the reminder about in the first place. He would then answer her question and restate everything he said in the first email. Her emails got to be quite a joke around here. Nothing we tried stopped them. She always emailed back and she always stated she was confused. Earlier this month Ds sent another reminder and stated the meeting was important b/c he would discuss record books, public presentations, how to be eligible for county awards, and they would be making decisions about the holiday party, future events and community service. He stated it would be a meeting without dogs. (We have very few without them.) Her email arrived, right on time. "____(her Dd's name) won't be coming. She thinks it is stupid to have a meeting without dogs." Um, well, okay. That's just maybe a little inappropriate. I fired off an extremely polite email (I made Dh check to make sure) telling her how much her Dd would be able to learn about how the club works and that she would get to know the other kids who were all eager to talk to her more. Also let her know it's hard to have discussions and make decisions when the dogs are there. She answered and said thanks and they would try to come. This week Ds sent out the info for the holiday party and reminded that we don't bring dogs to the party (it's held at a member's home--no room for 20+ dogs). We were all speculating here. What kind of response would we get from this lady? This time it took a whole day to arrive. "____(her Dd's name) has decided 4H is not for her, at least not this club." Wow! I guess I just don't get it. If the kid wants dogs at every meeting, I'm not sure what other club is going to go for that since there is no other dog club. And, every 4H club has meetings. They all do community service, public presentations, record books, etc. Our leaders happen to be very generous and allow kids to participate at whatever level of involvement they choose, so we have some members who only come to half of the meetings or less and aren't very involved (which can be frustrating at times). Weird. I get it if a kid just decides it isn't for them. I don't get it if they complain about not being able to bring their dog and the parent makes snarky comments about the club to people who have remained patient and encouraging. Weird and inappropriate (though also slightly amusing)--maybe she has issues? Maybe we should just be glad since that puts us down to 21 kids/dogs and that's still too many! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippen Posted November 30, 2012 Share Posted November 30, 2012 I wonder if perhaps she genuinely doesn't understand what's socially appropriate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In the Rain Posted November 30, 2012 Share Posted November 30, 2012 I wonder if perhaps she genuinely doesn't understand what's socially appropriate. Well now, that is much nicer than how I was planning to word it, so :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted November 30, 2012 Share Posted November 30, 2012 I agree with the woman on one point: she is confused! She truly doesn't get what being in a 4-H club involves. You and DS have been gracious and tried to help them. I would wish them well and breathe a sigh of relief. Maybe refer her to the local 4-H agent? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Word Nerd Posted November 30, 2012 Share Posted November 30, 2012 double post Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanvan Posted November 30, 2012 Author Share Posted November 30, 2012 I wonder if perhaps she genuinely doesn't understand what's socially appropriate. That is the conclusion we came to after discussing. I have a close friend who is sometimes like that. When I told him recently that I was glad a local TV camera only filmed my Dd and not me he commented "Yes that's good b/c the camera adds 10 more pounds." He got a good dose of sarcasm in return. For this mom, I made sure my kids wouldn't hold her comments against her or her Dd. They were primed to make a point of speaking to them at the meetings and make them feel welcome. It's odd, isn't it, that we are super polite to practical strangers and not so much to close friends when they goof with inappropriate comments. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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