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Hi! Reintroduction and question for those of you who have brought dc home from ps

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Hi all - it's been a long time. Up until about a year and a half ago I posted here and was hs my 2 ds (at that time they were in 3rd & 4th grade).


I appologize in advance for the length.


To make a long story short - after 3 yrs. of hs, for a variety of reasons, we thought it would be best to enroll the boys in the local ps. We discussed this with the boys and they seemed excited about this new venture. So, in the last week of the first grading period they entered the doors of the big brick building that we can see from our home.


Oldest ds (5th grade now) is in the "gifted" program and is due to start in the middle school next year. He seems to enjoy school, has friends, and participates in the various clubs and activities they offer. However, for a variety of reasons, we have major concerns about letting him attend the local middle school. Bottom line he is not being challenged the way he could/should be. We have explored options and are now considering hs again. At first I was very hesitant about the idea - after all this is "middle school" and this child is "gifted". I've gotten past my reservations on that issue and feel that I am capable of providing for him.


Here is my dilema - ds (4th grade- he will be 10 this Fri.) wants to come home too. Mind you, this is not a new plea - he wanted this at the end of last year also- right after he finished crying about school being over and how he was going to miss his teachers and it taking over an hour to get out of the school because he had to say good-bye to all of the staff.


This is not an issue except that I wonder if his reasons for wanting to come home aren't do more to some type of separation anxiety or if he really misses hs. This ds still wants me to walk him not just to school but to his classroom every day (in spite of there being a crossing guard every day this year - last year it was hit or miss with the crossing guard so I walked them to and from school). I have suggested that they are old enough to walk by themselves but he says he would miss me. He is excited to have me volunteer in the class and come and have lunch with him. He is the ds that has always been the snuggler - he is not ashamed to give me hugs in front of his classmates and holds on to me and wants my arm around him when we are at Mass.


On one hand he gives very legitimate reasons for wanting to hs again and on the other, some of them I really have to struggle to see through his eyes. For instance - last night I point blank asked him if he felt like he didn't fit in (last year there were issues of him learning to make friends on his own) his response was "all of the other kids - except for the new kids- have been there since kindergarten and they know who everyone is." By "everyone" he meant the staff. He is in the top classes for math and reading, has been a straight A student since he started, enjoys participating in the clubs, and once he made friends he has kept them.


I guess I'm just not sure if I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. If I'm reading too much into this and I should just be greatful that his personality is what it is. Don't get me wrong - I am very greatful for the hugs.


Any thoughts/opinions would be greatly appreciated.


Again, sorry for the length.



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My oldest (also 5th grade) sounds a lot like yours. I've been able to keep him challenged at home! Doing Latin, doing curriculum that is a couple years ahead of his "grade level", letting him watch lots of NOVA, PBS documentaries, giving him lots of Jules Verne to read (his current favorite) meets his need to be challenged. Some subjects though he is right at grade level and that is perfect for him too.


I don't see why you shouldn't bring your younger child home. There is no shame in missing his family or the hs environment. It means that you did a really good job in the past! He will not still be clinging to you when he is 20. It is a wonderful thing to have a snuggly boy at that age.

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It's always nice to hear someone elses opinion.


As for the 5th grader - keeping him challanged won't be too difficult. He's always looking for "input".


I guess my real concern w/ the 4th grader is, because brother has always been ahead, he tends to compare himself to him. In some ways I think it would be nice to leave him in ps 1 more year and let him "shine" w/out big brother around. Perhaps it would boost his self confidence.


Oh well, since they don't come w/ instructions, more prayer is definately needed on this one.


Thanks again.



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Just from the little you have written here, I have the impression that your younger son might benefit more from coming back home than he would from "shining" in ps. He wants to come home, and how would he feel if he still had to go when his brother didn't have to?


Another thing is that he won't be so home-oriented forever. In just a few years, he will start tugging away when you hug him.

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