Making the Homeschool High School Decision

[Tokyomarie]

I've also posted this on another set of forums, but since this is also for parents looking at or doing high school at home with their teens, I thought I would post here, also.

 

If your first child is between 6th-8th grade and you are trying to make the decision IF to homeschool for highschool and if yes, HOW to homeschool high school, what are your questions? What do you wonder about when you're thinking about this decision? What do you worry about when you envision doing homeschool high school?

 

If you are already homeschooling high school but can remember back to your questions, feel free to jump in.

 

If you have just started the homeschool high school journey and your first high school homeschooler is in 9th or 10th and you're on the fence about whether to continue, why? What's making you reconsider the choice to educate your child at home for high school?

 

If you started down the homeschool high school path but have since enrolled your child in a classroom high school why did you make a change? Are you happy with the change?

 

I've graduated two from our homeschool already and anticipate taking my son through high school. This year I am on our co-op's leadership team and we're wondering what questions families just starting on the journey into high school today have. We think they are somewhat different from the questions that families were asking 7-10 years ago when we started down that path, but I thought it would be interesting to ask here and find out what younger parents are thinking.

 

Thanking any and all contributors in advance!

[Tokyomarie]

Just bumping this post to the top for a new day. I'm really hoping to get some good feedback from people as they think about what is/was on their mind during that decision making process concerning homeschooling for high school.

[Gwen in VA]

We lived in a "very" good school district in Massachusetts, and we felt strongly that if we were going to send our kids to school we lived in the ideal place to do it. We decided not to, but these are some of the questions we wrestled with when my oldest two kids were in 7th and 6th.--

 

BTW, I would have sent them to school because I was so scared I would blow their educaitons! My husband and my kids talked me into continuing!

 

1) What will challenge the kids the most academically? What environment will cause them to think deeply about issues and develop their curiousity?

 

2) What environment will help them grow in their faith and see the world in light of their Christian faith?

 

3) What programs/opportunities will they miss out on if we homeschool them? (Choir was the big answer -- and we never did find a way for our kids to sing in high school!)

 

4) What programs/opportunities will they miss out on if we send them to school? (If they went to school, they would definitely need to cut back on extracurricular stuff)

 

5) Can Mom actually put together a challenging high school program? (That's where online classes come in!)

 

6) Will my relationship with my son survive 4 more years of homeschooling? (Online classes helped, and no, it hasn't been easy!)

 

7) What about social opportunities? (We moved to VA when my oldest entered 8th, so they never did find a close group of buddies down here. That was hard. but my younger ones do have some strong friendships that will hopefully last through high school.)

 

8) What about college? Will the colleges accept our "educational products"? (Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.....!!!!! But we didn't know that at the time -- it was an act of faith.)

 

9) What does God want for me (as the homeschooling mom) and my kids?

[Tokyomarie]

Gwen, thanks for this great list of questions! This is very helpful!

[Sharon in MD]

Sorry for the delay....I knew I wanted to respond, but I also knew this one would take time and thinking....

 

When we first started homeschooling, ds was going into 2nd grade. We made the change because we felt that this was what God wanted for our family. We wanted a strong academic base, solid Biblically based courses, the opportunity to go faster or slower as the need may be, the opportunity to build a really strong family relationship.

 

It seems to me that those reasons for homeschooling carry over into the high school decision. They don't change as your child gets older....in fact, I'd argue that they become even more important as a child approaches high school and college age. We want our son to be ready to stand up to the world views assault he will likely face in college and in the "real" world (he wants to go into engineering) and we felt that homeschooling would help us build that foundation more than any other option.

 

I also think that you really need to try to stay the course once you start high school at home. By that I mean 9th grade and beyond. High school is a whole package and I think that we need to approach it as a four year deal. I know that there are times and circumstances when a family has to change out of homeschool and go back to public or private education, but I think that it is vital to look at the big picture and what the consequences of changing horses in the middle of the river are going to be. When I was just about ready to throw in the towel at the end of 9th grade, which I will say is the hardest in my opinion, a dear friend quietly reminded my of the farming metaphor to homeschooling. How we plant the seed and tend the young plants etc. She said, "Don't plow your field before the harvest." What incredible advice.

 

Okay, enough preaching....

 

The questions I wrestled with the most were:

 

1. How will I know if what we are doing is good enough? How will I come up with a standard when I don't have anything with which to compare? This one still haunts me.

 

2. Where will I find support? One obvious answer for me has been this board and another is two local support groups. One is mom focused, small group share and prayer opportunity, and the other is our oversight academy for academic and accountability.

 

3. What will he miss as a result of going to home school high....as Gwen mentioned Choir, band, high school clubs, Robotic league, drama, those kinds of things?

- How important are those, do they make or break the plan?

- What could we do instead that might counter balance that?

(In our case, our oversight academy meets many of these needs)

 

4. What are some things that are unique opportunities available to us if we home school through high school that would be unavailable otherwise?

 

5. Does my kid want to do this? Because if they aren't on board I wouldn't even consider it.

 

6. Are my husband and I in agreement about this? What does he really think? What is he worried about?

 

7. What is the environment like in my local schools? Is this a place where my child can flourish or is it a cesspool? What are the kids like that are coming out of there? What influence will that have on my kid? (In our case, it's a cesspool)

 

8. What about the local private Christian schools? What are they really like? Are they really different from the public school or just pricier? Is there anything that they could offer that I could not that is truly significant?

 

9. How many of the classes should I teach and which ones?

 

10. How will I outsource it if I find I'm out of my depth? What are the options available in my area that I can turn to for help with academics?

 

11. How much time should I put into test prep (SAT/ACT)?

 

12. How will I handle labs? For us apologia and a few friends to do it with works just great.

 

That is about all I can think of right now, plus I'm sure someone else will come along and have many more wonderful points/questions.

 

I think what your group is doing is a great idea by the way. Good luck with it!

[Begonia]

Two of my "how to homeschool high school" role models, Gwen and Sharon, have already given you wonderful responses to these questions. My points are not listed in quite as pithy a way as theirs and some of my concerns have already been voiced by them, but I'd be happy to tell you what we're thinking.

 

My dd's currently in 8th grade and it's our second year homeschooling. She has recently decided that she would prefer to stay home for high school. The questions we're asking ourselves now are somewhat different from the questions we had when we first took the leap into homeschooling:

 

(in no particular order)

 

1. Will it be harder for my dd to get into the college of her choice? She has an older sister who is in her second year of university. This older child attended a New England boarding school. She applied to 11 colleges and was accepted at 10 of those. Will my homeschooled dd be as successful during her college search?

 

2. How can we prevent the college admissions game from killing all the joy and spontaneity in the next four years? Should we encourage our daughter to take "the most rigorous course of study available" (as per the college admissions websites) or should we let her delve deeply into her own interests and hope that the colleges will accept her based upon who she is? Does "the most rigorous course of study available" mean as many APs, SATIIs, etc. as possible, or can it be defined in other ways?

 

3. How difficult will it be to convince our local high school to allow her to take her AP exams, if such exams are not normally administered at that school?

 

4. Will it be possible for her to participate in high school sports? The governing body of our state's interscholastic sports team prohibits homeschoolers from participating in high school sports. My daughter (who is a two-time junior olympian and a national record holder in riflery) has been approached by the coaches of a local, non-high school affiliated team. They would very much like her to join next year, but their team plays against several local high school teams. Would her participation by illegal? Would I be putting the team in jeopardy if she participated? Would I be causing a homeschool "stink?"

 

5. Will courses designed by me be accepted by the NCAA clearinghouse? I have to make sure that dd's courses qualify under NCAA rules because my dd may want to shoot on a Division I team. The NCAA lists approved school-delivered and online courses but is less clear about mom-designed courses.

 

6. Will she miss not having had a typical teen social life? My dd's a bit of an introvert and seems to be happy having just two or three good friends on whom she can call, but is that enough? Will she, at some later date, regret not having had a more typical upbringing? She loves the interaction with her friends from her online classes, but should I make more of an effort to find venues where she can interact with others her age? How do I do that-- do I try to seek out other homeschool social/educational groups (not very successful, thus far), or should I forget about homeschoolers as possible friends and look for groups that specialize in one of her interests (it's been difficult to find teens with her interests, much easier to find adults).

 

7. If she takes a rigorous course of study, with several online AP courses, SATIIs, community college classes, and in-depth test prep, will she have time to continue studying two foreign languages? She loves both Latin and Spanish but doesn't see how she can fit them both in. Should she continue Latin classes in order to take the AP exams and continue with Spanish just "for fun?"

 

8. How can I compare the relative value of the various online classes? Which is better for my dd-- Scholars Online, PA Homeschoolers, Keystone...? How to make the choice? Actually, Gwen, Sharon, and others on this board have been very helpful in this regard-- thank you!

[Sharon in MD]

Especially coming from the viewpoint of NCAA eligibility. That is an area I've never even had to think about personally.

 

And thank you so much for the sweet compliment. I just love being part of these boards....everyone has always been so helpful to me.

[Sharon in MD]

The one time I was really, truly ready to put the lad in school during 9th grade, we were having a bit of a power struggle set to. My husband and I drew up a home school contract that spelled out what ds needed to do to remain under the privileged umbrella of homeschooling and made ds sign it. :o

 

The second thing is at one point I really questioned if we could provide the kind of rigor he needed in math and science since he wants to be an engineer. We have a math and science magnet school in our district. (but it's still a cesspool). I went to a parent conference for gifted students and the key note speaker was the dean of JHU's Engineering School. His topic....why engineers so desperately need a solid liberal arts background rather than a purely technical pedigree! Talk about a God-send!:D

 

Cheers!

[Tokyomarie]

Sorry for the delay....I knew I wanted to respond, but I also knew this one would take time and thinking....

 

Thanks for taking the time to reply! I thought it might take some time for people to think but I also wanted to be sure my post didn't get lost to the second page.

 

 

The second thing is at one point I really questioned if we could provide the kind of rigor he needed in math and science since he wants to be an engineer. We have a math and science magnet school in our district. (but it's still a cesspool). I went to a parent conference for gifted students and the key note speaker was the dean of JHU's Engineering School. His topic....why engineers so desperately need a solid liberal arts background rather than a purely technical pedigree! Talk about a God-send!:D

 

Cheers!

 

That JHU Engineering Dean has got it! My dh is an engineer but his education was almost purely technical- save for the Gen Ed. requirements for his undergrad degree. I've realized recently why we've had some of the conversations and disagreements over the last few years that we've had. My views on liberal arts education, formed in my biased-against-liberal arts study childhood have changed so radically in the last 18 years since I've been reading books and articles on education. Dh's views have not been changed because he hasn't taken the time to read what I've been reading, nor to talk to me about what I've been learning.

[Tokyomarie]

Two of my "how to homeschool high school" role models, Gwen and Sharon, have already given you wonderful responses to these questions. My points are not listed in quite as pithy a way as theirs and some of my concerns have already been voiced by them, but I'd be happy to tell you what we're thinking.

 

Thanks, Begonia, so much for sharing your thoughts! I'm looking not only for the list of ALL the different questions parents have, but for which ones are the most FREQUENTLY asked.

 

You've given me a great list, and the ones about NCAA eligibility are great. I know it has become easier to gain eligibility but we're not sports minded in our house, so your very specific questions help me to better understand the issue.

[Janet in WA]

One question many have is: What if we start high school at home, but change our minds mid-stream and my student decides to complete her high school education at a public (or private) high school? Will our home-earned credits be accepted by the high school at that point? Is there some way to increase our chances that they will?

[Laura K (NC)]

Around here most homeschoolers bail out in 8th-10th grades. Homeschoolers can enroll kids in Forsyth Tech beginning in their junior year (or when they turn 16), but until then it gets more and more difficult. There are local co-ops but they are really good and plentiful in the earlier years but then as kids get older there are fewer options, and kids get more specialized as they get older so you can hardly find two teenagers who need the same history or math or even writing class during the same academic year. And high school kids are more conscious about their academic year than they have ever been before, and the social status involved in younger and older high schoolers.

 

I wrote a letter to our local homeschooling group, encouraging homeschoolers who were thinking they couldn't do it to take the time to ask questions in our email list. There are education options around here other than community college and co-ops for parents who really don't think they can direct their (often unwilling) teenager in more specialized, difficult classes like higher maths and critical writing and lit. analysis, especially if they have a lot of younger children with their own needs to teach as well. I sent a composite list of online classes (gathered from this board, actually) that could help; I reminded them of the local private schools and even a public high school that allows homeschoolers to take individual classes.

 

I found a few moms who might be able to work on even one class together for 10th graders. We'll be talking it out in the next few months to see if we can make it work. Even if we can get help with one class, it will make the job seem more manageable.

 

Once our kids can drive things are much easier, but in those teen years before they drive, the semester before the freshman year until the end of the sophomore year, are pretty hard on a family who have pretty good public schools nearby, and they know so many homeschooled teens have moved on and done really well.

 

I also reminded the parents on our local homeschool email list that the public schools are happy to take homeschooled teens here. They don't ask for any documentation, they just welcome them right in. This is because parents have done such a good job homeschooling that they are not only farther ahead academically but are also often the salt and light that their parents raised them to be. This is a testament to a job well done, and a job that is worth continuing.

[Tokyomarie]

Around here most homeschoolers bail out in 8th-10th grades. Homeschoolers can enroll kids in Forsyth Tech beginning in their junior year (or when they turn 16), but until then it gets more and more difficult. There are local co-ops but they are really good and plentiful in the earlier years but then as kids get older there are fewer options, and kids get more specialized as they get older so you can hardly find two teenagers who need the same history or math or even writing class during the same academic year. And high school kids are more conscious about their academic year than they have ever been before, and the social status involved in younger and older high schoolers..

 

I think this is one of the biggest challenges! My oldest dd graduated from our homeschool in 2003. At that time we had a handful of parents with kids coming into high school who wanted to keep them home but wanted more outside classes for core academics. At that time our co-op mainly offered the fun elective kinds of classes, which are great but a full day of fun elective stuff really cuts into time for academic study.

 

The outcome of some discussions at that time resulted in that co-op getting more serious about developing its programs for middle school and high school students, while some of the original parents left and formed a new co-op that was focused FIRST on MS/HS as a priority and secondarily on a program for younger children. A third co-op for older students has also been formed by one of the original co-op's former members. There are a couple of other drop-off type programs that have developed. All are getting older students and there is a huge variety of both academic and elective classes offered.

 

In short, because of the discussions of about 6-10 people who all had co-op leadership experience in the original co-op, several efforts got off the ground and are thriving.

 

I also reminded the parents on our local homeschool email list that the public schools are happy to take homeschooled teens here. They don't ask for any documentation, they just welcome them right in. This is because parents have done such a good job homeschooling that they are not only farther ahead academically but are also often the salt and light that their parents raised them to be. This is a testament to a job well done, and a job that is worth continuing.

 

Are you saying that the high school will take on a student past 9th grade without making them go all the way back to 9th grade? If so, that is amazing!

[Tokyomarie]

One question many have is: What if we start high school at home, but change our minds mid-stream and my student decides to complete her high school education at a public (or private) high school? Will our home-earned credits be accepted by the high school at that point? Is there some way to increase our chances that they will?

 

That is an important question, to which I don't know the answer.