What has happened to my son's brain?

[hollyhock]

He's turning 11 in two months and lately he can hardly do anything in school. He used to do most of his work independently, with some help from me, and now it seems I have to sit with him every moment for him to understand and complete anything. The only thing he still mostly gets is spelling. Is this normal for this age? I've seen a few threads around here about boys and (lack of) brains. What do you do to help them and deal with this? Here I thought we were at an age where we could be moving toward more independence and it seems to be going the opposite direction.

[AimeeM]

Ah. My 11 year old daughter is having the same "issue". She's distractable, moody, and lazy. The pediatrician laughs and says it's normal... and it does seem to be. Doesn't make it any easier to deal with though.

No advice; I can commiserate though.

[HecticMama]

I commiserate. My 11 yr old dd is just the same. She says everything is "boring." My 9 yr old is a hard worker. I'll hate it when she gets to this stage!

[mumto2]

Ds12 has been like that for about a year. We don't get that much done when they work together anymore. Independent work is a thing of the past, I actively teach again for everything except math. He can still do that if motivated but he is really good at math. He falls asleep if left by himself studying. I think he could sleep all day and just get up and eat tons. He is fine but so different from his sister!

[SilverMoon]

That brain is goo now. Hormones turned it into primordial slime. Just when you think you see light at the end of the tunnel they'll do it again, too. :tongue_smilie:

 

Imagine his brain all wrapped up in a cocoon. Eventually he'll emerge a lovely human being. :001_smile:

[MrsMe]

Good. It's not just my kid. She did really well last year and this year I have a different kid.

[kchara]

I'm there with you as well. I'm seriously, seriously considering putting my 11 yo in a brick and mortar school next year. :glare:

[hollyhock]

Thank you!! At least I know it isn't somehow my fault and that we just have to work through it. He was better today with school work so we'll just keep swimming.

[Cynful]

This is why I'm cramming as much into my youngest BEFORE he gets to that age. I'm still waiting for my DS15 to get out of his "cocoon" - it's happening, just s.l.o.w.l.y. :)

[dereksurfs]

This is why I'm cramming as much into my youngest BEFORE he gets to that age. I'm still waiting for my DS15 to get out of his "cocoon" - it's happening, just s.l.o.w.l.y. :)

 

 

Same here. I'm really happy we've gotten to Pre-Algebra before this hormonal brain fog hits. ds11 is still 90% independent in all subjects. But this thread definately has me concerned since he is the oldest. Its going to be really hard if/when this regression occurs. :scared: I wonder if this can somehow miraculously skip one child and possibly move to the next youngest/oldest? I'm hoping we can skip at least one. :tongue_smilie:

[hollyhock]

Well, I need to post an update. This morning my son was doing math so pathetically that I got serious on him and called him on it. What do you know, he took his math to his room and completed nearly his whole assignment without any help from me. When reported to the principal, aka DH, he got a straight but gentle confrontation, where it came out that he hasn't been trying in school. So in this case, although perhaps age and hormones had something to do with it, it was also a lot of attitude toward his school work. After this talk, the rest of school went better.

 

The moral of my story is... make sure your kid isn't just giving you attitude. Mine was this time and I can't imagine how much worse it would have grown if left unchecked.

[dereksurfs]

Thanks for the update! It's great to hear when parental intervention makes a positive impact like this. :D I can imagine during the teen years that 'attitude' can get worse/more resistant to redirection.