Bickering at Food-CO-Op Pick-Up- Advice?

[Soror]

I'm the coordinator for our local food co-op and have been for the last 1.5 yrs. Generally we haven't had any issue, except for occasional late comers. Well, today I see a lady approach one of the men and say something about how if he has a problem with her son(teenager) he needs to come out and say something. Then I heard him say something about how he is doing all the work. Then something else with another lady(who is the mother of the first lady) about her husband serving in the Army. Lots of grumbling in between.

 

When I came home I had a call from the lady asking if the guy is usually there (he is nearly always there and they are new) and how they should handle this situation etc.

 

I'm at a lost and really don't want in the middle of this. My only thought is, keep your head down and help the best you can and don't engage but be polite and friendly- for both sides. I don't want in the middle of some back and forth business at all and everyone should feel free to order though, sigh. I didn't ever expect this to be in my job duties!!!

[Guest]

keep your head down and help the best you can and don't engage but be polite and friendly- for both sides.

Sounds good to me. I might want to add, "I'm not a referee." I know I would want to go hide in a corner IRL, though.

[Candid]

Unfortunately, I think as co-ordinator, it is your job. It was when I was for ours for 20 years. Perhaps everyone sit down at a meeting and address the problem, not with specifics with so-and-so said this, but that this is how things are run and if someone has a problem they come to you. I have to say, the snarkiness is one reason that I don't miss it.

 

:iagree:

 

I'd also tune up my observational skills. Is the guy right or wrong about the teen's level of work? If I had a guy who is almost always there who is unhappy with a teen's level or work, I'd assume he is correct in his assessment, but I'd observe. And does it matter if the teen works or not? (I assume that your co-op has a number of hours that must be worked and that teen son is serving his family's time. If so he needs to do his fair share of work.)

[Soror]

Our co-op doesn't have any set time of hrs to work. You are not even required to pick up your own stuff, as long as someone else picks it up for you it doesn't matter. The only rules that have been handed to me for this are that you make sure you stuff is picked up. It is expected that everyone helps that is there but there are no specific guidelines.

 

The thing is we've been short on the number of men who show up leaving a lot of the bigger lifting to a few. The new people were a bit standoffish and not jumping right in but I took that as more they weren't sure how much to jump in, nearly everyone is that way at first. We've never even come close to this sort of issue before.

 

I did almost send an email out after last delivery about ordering heavy items and making sure you are sending someone able to pick it up. As far as being a referee I meant I physically won't get in the middle and I'm not taking sides, as I seen it. The one side could have helped more and the one side could have been less grumpy, but I didn't see him being overly antagonistic. Being there I don't think it called for mediation personally, just a bit of get over it. It was something petty and to me not necessitating intervention. Personally, I wouldn't expect that in another situation for adults. It is more like playground stuff and such. As far as my official duties, I'm not paid or compensated at all. I am just to be the one there to receive and sign for invoice and let anyone know of any changes. We have once a month delivery and that is it.

[LaxMom]

Yeah, I think you're going to have to make some rules regarding assessment of others' participation and effort. You know, like with 5 year olds: YOU worry about YOU.

 

We do have guidelines for helping (4x per year is the expectation), but nobody has every really complained about the people who are unable to help because of their work hours or because they have infants and toddlers or whatever. We've even discussed the "cash cow" role of people who have no interest other than ordering, which keeps our running total up, which keeps our discount in place, unpublished sales, etc.

 

I do think guidelines need to be in place in any group, so everyone operates with the same assumptions, and we have them, but I don't think we ever enforce them.

 

(our coordinator also gets 10% - or $10, for orders over $100 - that is added to each individual invoice)

[MomatHWTK]

Perhaps suggest to the new person that if she doesn't want to find herself in the position to finish a fight, she shouldn't start it? I would probably clarify to her that you are there to sign the invoice not settle fights between adults.

[Soror]

I cannot see how there can be rules as to participation any number of times. We might have someone who only orders 1-3 x a year and others that order every month. It is not required by the co-op company that anyone order every month or any other frequency and even then orders vary wildly in amount necessitating different amounts of work, ie obviously a $2k order is a lot more to unload than a $50 order. I don't think I could add anything to invoices for payment, even if I wanted.

 

I have a general guidelines of expectations that I go over with everyone on the phone and also in introductory document.

-arrive on time at least and preferably a hair bit early

-keep track of communication so you know of any changes- and I don't have to hunt you down

-everybody pitch in and help

 

I have sent out reminders before when I had issues with lateness and that was enough to resolve it. I was not happy when it was myself w/ 6 kids(babysitting others) and a friend with her 3 kids in 90+ weather unloading the whole truck because everyone else was late. As it is right now I'm limited as I'm just so hugely pregnant it is hard for me to carry anything very heavy or bulky(I cannot fit it front of my belly).