4th grade feedback?

[DragonFaerie]

I'd love some feedback on my DS's writing. He is two weeks into 4th grade and 9 years old. Here is a history summary, complete with his misspellings and punctuation:

 

"Mary queen of scot inharited the throne when she was five days old. Her mother had to rule until she is old enuf to rule on her oun. When she was 13 she was allowed to rule. When she was 21 or 25 she had a baby boy. When she lost the throne she went to her sousin for help but her cousin was afraid that she was going to kill her so she had Mary beheaded."

 

And here is one more:

 

"King Fhilip made a enconiendas that lets him take all of the South American gold. An enconiendas is a contract. South Americans worked all day collecting gold for King Fhilip. Even kids had to work in the South American mines."

 

Well, what do you all think? Is he where he needs to be? More importantly, is he behind where he needs to be?

[ErinE]

He did a great job! In his first narration, he writes about the main character, Mary. The sentences progress from her as a young child to her death later. In the second, all the sentences relate to the mining of South America. In both narrations, there's nothing extra and the thoughts flow well.

 

 

For my ds, I usually don't critique narrations right after writing other than to make sure there's a logical flow to the sentences and check spelling for words he knows. I keep notes for later discussions. Separate from writing, you might want to discuss titles, comma usage, and spelling (oun, sousin, Fhilip). I made comments below for what I would discuss with my son at a later date, but since I don't know your son, I can't specifically say what he should work on. The only repeating error is the use of commas in dependent clauses, but if you haven't covered it in grammar study, I wouldn't worry about it.

 

Also, I don't cover all this at once. It's parceled out in dribs and drabs: titles one week, dependent clauses another, spelling the next.

 

"Mary queen of scots [titles: Mary is Queen of Scots] inharited [inherited: I wouldn't worry about the spelling here unless he's spelling at this level] the throne when she was five days old. Her mother had to rule until she is old enuf [enough: I might make this a spelling word] to rule on her oun [own: a word to know by 4th]. When she was 13[,] [commas: if covered, I might talk about dependent clauses] she was allowed to rule. When she was 21 or 25 [,] [see prior comment] she had a baby boy. When she lost the throne [,] she went to her sousin [since it was spelled correctly later, I might say, what's this word?] for help [commas separating independent clauses: I would make note of this] but her cousin was afraid that she was going to kill her so she had Mary beheaded."

 

"King Fhilip made a enconiendas that lets him take all of the South American gold. An enconiendas is a contract. South Americans worked all day collecting gold for King Fhilip. Even kids had to work in the South American mines." [Philip: I would suggest if he's not sure how a name is spelled, it's okay to ask before writing]

[DragonFaerie]

He did a great job! In his first narration, he writes about the main character, Mary. The sentences progress from her as a young child to her death later. In the second, all the sentences relate to the mining of South America. In both narrations, there's nothing extra and the thoughts flow well.

 

 

For my ds, I usually don't critique narrations right after writing other than to make sure there's a logical flow to the sentences and check spelling for words he knows. I keep notes for later discussions. Separate from writing, you might want to discuss titles, comma usage, and spelling (oun, sousin, Fhilip). I made comments below for what I would discuss with my son at a later date, but since I don't know your son, I can't specifically say what he should work on. The only repeating error is the use of commas in dependent clauses, but if you haven't covered it in grammar study, I wouldn't worry about it.

 

Also, I don't cover all this at once. It's parceled out in dribs and drabs: titles one week, dependent clauses another, spelling the next.

 

Thanks! Basically, I make editing marks to show capitals, spelling mistakes, etc. And some things I don't harp on too much yet (like the commas). I'm mostly just concerned about whether or not he seems to be on "grade level". I have no frame of reference. :-)

[ErinE]

Like I said, I think they're both great. He has a multi-sentence answer of good content with logical flow and nothing extra. Kudos to him!

[tammieb]

I agree! He did a wonderful job grasping the concepts --- which, at this age, is more important (in my humble opinion :)) than all the grammatical and spelling perfection. That will come with instruction and practice. Helping our children grasp an understanding of what they're learning is our most important objective at any age.

 

And...... just so you won't think you're alone, here's an example of my son's spelling typos (exact same age and grade -- 9 y/o, just entered 4th grade). He was to give a synonym for vocabulary words:

 

particular = "spuciffick"

 

zeal = "jeelousy"

 

 

So, I'm right there with ya!

 

Happy Homeschooling!

 

Tammie

[DragonFaerie]

I agree! He did a wonderful job grasping the concepts --- which, at this age, is more important (in my humble opinion :)) than all the grammatical and spelling perfection. That will come with instruction and practice. Helping our children grasp an understanding of what they're learning is our most important objective at any age.

 

And...... just so you won't think you're alone, here's an example of my son's spelling typos (exact same age and grade -- 9 y/o, just entered 4th grade). He was to give a synonym for vocabulary words:

 

particular = "spuciffick"

 

zeal = "jeelousy"

 

 

So, I'm right there with ya!

 

Happy Homeschooling!

 

Tammie

 

Thanks, Tammie. :001_smile:

[DragonFaerie]

It looks great

 

Thanks. The feedback is making me feel better about where he is right now.

[CatholicMom]

Looks great to me! My son is the same age and grade and can narrate well, but can't spell nearly that well. lol I'm impressed.

[Wildiris]

DD, same age, writes similar summaries; however, I do not think this is a job well done. I'm a mean Mommy. I will tell DD she needs to do a better job. I go over the mistakes and expect a better job on the next entry. I review with DD on the next entry the mistakes of the previous entry. I expect improvement in writing style, spelling, and content. Kids at this age generalize and I urge specifics, concrete facts organized in a coherent flow of thinking. More writing and reading will help spelling along with a solid spelling program with dictation.

[DragonFaerie]

Looks great to me! My son is the same age and grade and can narrate well, but can't spell nearly that well. lol I'm impressed.

 

Thanks. Spelling is actually one of my biggest concerns with him. His spelling is terrible! LOL

[DragonFaerie]

DD, same age, writes similar summaries; however, I do not think this is a job well done. I'm a mean Mommy. I will tell DD she needs to do a better job. I go over the mistakes and expect a better job on the next entry. I review with DD on the next entry the mistakes of the previous entry. I expect improvement in writing style, spelling, and content. Kids at this age generalize and I urge specifics, concrete facts organized in a coherent flow of thinking. More writing and reading will help spelling along with a solid spelling program with dictation.

 

Thanks for your suggestions. I definitely go over my corrections with him and explain anything he doesn't understand. He is also just starting to use a paragraph organizer to help him get his thoughts in order before writing. I'm hoping that will help him, though I do think he did fairly well with including specific facts in a reasonable order.

[kwg]

uhoh. So...if your dc does not spell a word correctly, you let it slide?

 

My ds is a horrible speller!

[DragonFaerie]

uhoh. So...if your dc does not spell a word correctly, you let it slide?

 

My ds is a horrible speller!

 

 

No, I definitely correct misspelled words. A lot of times, he'll ask me how to spell something while he's writing. And for this assignment, he was allowed to use the SOTW book to help him with spelling (obviously it wasn't perfect :tongue_smilie:).

[tammieb]

uhoh. So...if your dc does not spell a word correctly, you let it slide?

 

My ds is a horrible speller!

 

I look at the misspelled words in perspective. If it's a word that he wrote phonetically correct, that tells me he's working through the process in his brain. Words that have unique sounds and blends or are subject to special spelling rules I can't realistically expect him to just know how to spell.

 

If it's something he should know, I correct him. If it's something he's not come across yet, I instruct him in the correct spelling.

 

Happy homeschooling :)