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how to leave a music teacher?


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My daughter wants to take music lessons with a new teacher. DD thinks that now is the time to try working with someone new, stretch in new directions, get help with some technique issues that have become ingrained--before she makes a decision about taking this instrument to college, possibly as a major. She is very excited about making this change.

 

What is the most palatable way to present this to the current teacher?

 

DD is dreading telling her current teacher, with whom DD began studying this instrument when she was a little girl.

 

We understand that DD's relationship with the teacher is a business/professional relationship, but we recognize that music teachers invest emotionally in their students. Furthermore, this teacher's studio has contracted--a lot--in recent years. Also, the teacher beat back a life-threatening illness and has residual health difficulties. All this makes DD nervous about breaking the news. I could imagine DD actually recanting her decision if the teacher offers any reason that this is not a good move.

 

Thanks for any insight.

 

Lee

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We just did what you described. DD~15 decided to quit piano after 10 years of study. DD felt she had reach the end of the road with what her teacher and any of the teachers in our area could offer. More over, DD saw no future for herself as a performing pianist, although she had reached advanced repertoire and theory. DD~15 wants to use what she knows and learn to sing.

 

Talking to the piano teacher was awkward. I call our teacher first and explained DD's desire to quit lessons. I then requested DD and the teacher have one final conversation. This teacher has known DD since she was three months old, and DD was one of her most accomplished students. DD was very firm in her decision. DD and I discussed the probability that her teacher would try to persuade her to continue and how DD could handle the conversation. Ultimately, it is about what is good for the student. Our discussions centered on what was important for all concerned. It became clear in my discussions with DD that she (we) not sacrifice her happiness and well-being to please and accommodate someone she was paying for lessons. People evolve and move on in their lives.

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I am a music teacher and would completely understand if a teenaged student wanted to change teachers after many years with just me. It makes perfect sense for a whole variety of reasons, and it is a healthy thing to do.

 

Give the teacher a call and explain the situation, then arrange for a final lesson together. Have your daughter write her a card or give some kind of small token in thanks for all the years of lessons. If you have any photos from recitals over the years to share, that might be nice to share. Let her know how much she is valued, that you'll continue to recommend her to other parents, and stress that it is simply time for your dd to gain a fresh perspective on the instrument.

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[Give the teacher a call and explain the situation, then arrange for a final lesson together. Have your daughter write her a card or give some kind of small token in thanks for all the years of lessons. If you have any photos from recitals over the years to share, that might be nice to share. Let her know how much she is valued, that you'll continue to recommend her to other parents, and stress that it is simply time for your dd to gain a fresh perspective on the instrument.

 

:iagree: The photo idea is a beautiful one.

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I am a music teacher and would completely understand if a teenaged student wanted to change teachers after many years with just me. It makes perfect sense for a whole variety of reasons, and it is a healthy thing to do.

 

Give the teacher a call and explain the situation, then arrange for a final lesson together. Have your daughter write her a card or give some kind of small token in thanks for all the years of lessons. If you have any photos from recitals over the years to share, that might be nice to share. Let her know how much she is valued, that you'll continue to recommend her to other parents, and stress that it is simply time for your dd to gain a fresh perspective on the instrument.

 

:iagree:

 

Wonderful advice!

 

I think calling and telling the teacher first, before having your daughter tell her, would make it so much easier on both of them.

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