battlemaiden Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 How should I approach a gift for a friend. She has been a widow for nearly six years. She has two kids, one is in college, the other jr. high. I never knew her dh. She also has a successful career (if that makes a difference- she isn't bored at home all day is my point). Can I tactfully give a gift? I bought some nice bath salts this morning thinking of her. But since her kids are old enough am I butting in? I guess what I'm asking is how to tell someone that I see how hard she has worked to raise these great kids on her own for the past few years without opening any wounds? We aren't close enough to have discussed the topic of her dh's death, although she knows that I know. Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle in MO Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 I don't think you would be butting in at all. Her children can remember her, of course, but it would be an amazing achievement to raise children by yourself. I've seen plenty of cards at places like Hallmark labeled as "Mother's Day for Friends," etc. Yes, I think it would be very appropriate; a nice card, perhaps a bouquet of flowers, a scented candle. You could always put in a note telling her how much you've admired her over the years and encourage her in her efforts. This is a beautiful thought, and I think your "gut instinct," if that's the right word, is correct. Blessings to you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OKCyndi Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 is always welcome! Every mom would like some encouragement, especially from a respected Battle Maiden! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted May 10, 2008 Share Posted May 10, 2008 I would give the gift. It's a wonderful idea. Even if you don't discuss her dh's death, she's probably going to be thinking about her dh tomorrow. My MIL is a widow and raised five children mostly on her own. I know she would have appreciated any acknowledgement of her effort on Mother's Day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crissy Posted May 11, 2008 Share Posted May 11, 2008 I can't imagine an instance where acknowledging a mother's work, her time and her love for her children would not be welcomed. It's a very sweet thing you are doing Jo. Happy Mother's Day to YOU! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted May 11, 2008 Share Posted May 11, 2008 How about if your note says it's a "thank you" on Mother's Day for showing you a great example and helping you be a better mother yourself? I wouldn't really worry about the "butting in." Anyone is welcome to send me a present tomorrow. Please! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
battlemaiden Posted May 11, 2008 Author Share Posted May 11, 2008 Thanks. I honestly consider Mother's Day a day to celebrate MY mother, MY MIL, and of course for my children to lavish attention upon me. ;) It has never really seemed like a day to honor ALL mothers, IYKWIM? But, perhaps I've just been selfish all this time. I'll go with the simple "Thanks for being such a great mother. I admire all you do." How's that? Happy Mothers Day everyone! Jo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PariSarah Posted May 11, 2008 Share Posted May 11, 2008 Believe it or not, the holiday was originally promoted by a woman who wanted Christians to honor the spiritual leadership of their mothers, so I think it's very appropriate to honor a woman who is not your mother but who has had a meaningful impact on you spiritually. Telling her that you admire her parenting will make her day. (I think I'd be in tears all day if someone did that for me.) Good on you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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