JumpyTheFrog Posted April 6, 2011 Author Share Posted April 6, 2011 You obviously feel a pull for friendship, have you thought why that is? He doesn't seem to be a person you would want to befriend from your description... I've been thinking about your question. As I've mulled it over the past few days, I remembered how in high school, I was often unable to let go when friendships were over. There was one boy that I felt turned several friends (of many years) against me. I stayed loyal to them and still treated them as before, all while they largely started being too busy for me. Most of them weren't mean...they just acted more like acquaintances. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3lilreds in NC Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 I am SO glad you've left the church. That was going to be my first suggestion - RUN, not walk, away from there as quickly as possible. I don't think you should continue the friendship. There isn't a friendship. You cannot reconcile because he is NOT SORRY. You can forgive, but without him realizing that he did, in fact, sin against you, you can't restore the friendship. You can let the wife visit if she likes, but I agree, she will probably fade out with time. :grouphug: What a horrifying church experience. I hope you find another one. (If you have already, I'm sorry, I don't get to hang out here as much as I would like and I missed that part.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom4him Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 I don't have any advice but I do want to thank you for sharing. I have struggled with a relationship for some time now. At one time this person was my best friend and we spent a lot of time together. Lots has happened and we spend NO time together. The most is an occasional email. I have really struggled with simply letting it die though. With some of the answers you have gotten I realize that it really was her that stepped WAY over the line and I need to be able to totally walk away. :001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harriet Vane Posted April 6, 2011 Share Posted April 6, 2011 No. Fred has major boundary issues. It's not his place, even as an elder, to police your beliefs on what seems like a non-fundamental (since you're talking about OT laws and all). It's not his place, even as a friend, to criticize you or your marriage. It's not his place, even as an elder or a friend, to have any input into the next church you attend. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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