happyWImom Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 My dd-7, has had this huge, irrational, over the top fear of someone taking her. She has felt this way for the last few years. We've watched the "safeside adult" dvd's prior to this, and she was okay, but we had an incident at a local park a year or so ago, where she got separated from us (it was this maze like playground structure & she was supposed to stay with the other kids-the parents were in the middle) and then she panicked when some adults tried to help her. She thought they were tricking her (just like the dvd said!). Anyway, this seems to have stuck with her, and actually her fears seem to be getting worse. To the point where she won't even let me go get the mail while she is in the house. Or, if I'm in another room & she hasn't seen me in a while, she panics and runs around crying for me. I feel really bad, and it is causes problems, obviously. If we are in public, it's not enough that she/I am within sight, she needs to be right close to me. Sometimes this is fine, but at a playground, the beach, etc... (when it's not crowded) I have to be right there, not sitting on a bench watching. I did get the book "What to do When You Worry Too Much-A kid's guide to overcoming anxiety". We are trying it, but it's too soon to tell. I wanted to see if anyone else has had anything like this, and what did you do? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ibbygirl Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 I don't have any advice, but I just wanted to send you lots of :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: and support. I'm so sorry for your poor dd. I will pray for you and her. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
specialmama Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 :grouphug: Hugs as well, Tammi. My aunt went through this with her dd. My cousin (her dd) began this fear after a "Danger! Stranger!" presentation at the library; she was 5. It became worse all the time. My aunt would be in the mall and a lady would say "oh what a nice dress you have!" to my cousin, or "how old are you?" and my cousin would FREAK OUT screaming at the top of her lungs, "Danger! Stranger!" and not stop until my aunt literally carried her out of there. My cousin would be shaking, sobbing, having nightmares, et al. When she was 9 she finally took her to see someone. All I can say is that my cousin is now totally fine, she just graduated from Criminology at Uni :tongue_smilie: and she can now laugh at how she used to behave. My aunt? Her only lament is that she waited so long to seek help for her dd. I'm not sure if my aunt is the kind of person to read a book and help her dd herself, so not sure if she did that. But if after you've finished following suggestions in that book, and if you dd is still struggling, it may be worth looking into before a completely debilitating phobia sets in. :grouphug: Hugs to you and your girl... it's a difficult spot to be in. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie4b Posted July 23, 2009 Share Posted July 23, 2009 My dd-7, has had this huge, irrational, over the top fear of someone taking her. She has felt this way for the last few years. We've watched the "safeside adult" dvd's prior to this, and she was okay, but we had an incident at a local park a year or so ago, where she got separated from us (it was this maze like playground structure & she was supposed to stay with the other kids-the parents were in the middle) and then she panicked when some adults tried to help her. She thought they were tricking her (just like the dvd said!). Anyway, this seems to have stuck with her, and actually her fears seem to be getting worse. To the point where she won't even let me go get the mail while she is in the house. Or, if I'm in another room & she hasn't seen me in a while, she panics and runs around crying for me. I feel really bad, and it is causes problems, obviously. If we are in public, it's not enough that she/I am within sight, she needs to be right close to me. Sometimes this is fine, but at a playground, the beach, etc... (when it's not crowded) I have to be right there, not sitting on a bench watching. I did get the book "What to do When You Worry Too Much-A kid's guide to overcoming anxiety". We are trying it, but it's too soon to tell. I wanted to see if anyone else has had anything like this, and what did you do? I'd take her to see someone. Treatment for a phobia like that is not too long, is usually effective, and it's good to nip it in the bud. It's affecting her ability to function normally and costing her normal experiences of childhood. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Terabith Posted July 25, 2009 Share Posted July 25, 2009 See, this is why I have tried to limit my kid's exposure to stranger danger talks. I think it's such a stupid thing. We talk about what to do if you get lost (stay where you are, ask a mother with children for help), and we've done good touch - bad touch talk, but I really don't want to introduce the idea that strangers are bad, because they aren't. And how do you meet anyone if strangers are dangerous? Well, and we do the "Don't go in a car with anyone without Mommy or Daddy or Grandma/ Grandpa saying it's ok." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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