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MomatHWTK

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Posts posted by MomatHWTK

    Need help--racism rears its ugly head re African-American crimes

    in The Chat Board

    Posted · Edited by MomatHWTK

    Pew Research Institute is a good source for data. I will keep an eye out for specific studies and reports. 

     

    This may be overbroad, but it is a start:

    https://scholar.google.com/scholar?q=racial+bias+in+arrests+and+suspensions&hl=en&as_sdt=0&as_vis=1&oi=scholart&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjJpoiq4e_RAhVD04MKHWhxDwwQgQMIGjAA

     

     

    Also, this:

    http://abc7news.com/news/report-finds-racial-disparities-in-traffic-related-arrests-across-ca/1287007/

     

     

    • Like 1

    Your marriage/parenting plan when you were a young adult

    in The Chat Board

    Posted

    I think that you are just seeing posts by individuals who want and plan to make changes because that takes planning. For those who will continue to stay at home and look forward to doing so, there's not much that needs to be discussed. Their plan is already in the works.  :001_smile:

     

    My life plans look nothing like what I thought about as a teen, very little like what I thought of as a young adult or even in my late twenties. But it's all good. I just keep an eye out for that next branch in the road and then go for it. 

    • Like 3

    2017 vent thread

    in The Chat Board

    Posted

    Oh, I needed this today!

     

    I leave on Wednesday for a 4-day trip.  I cleared it with the parents I babysit for over two weeks ago, nearly three, and reiterated the dates when I had them confirmed.  They were shocked today when I again reminded them I leave Wednesday. 

     

    And they haven't paid me for last week, either.  It has been a habit of 'forgetting' for a while now.

    Perhaps absence will make the heart grow fonder or the mind less "forgetful."

    2017 vent thread

    in The Chat Board

    Posted

    Is it supposed to be a love bite?

    Yes! He thinks I am the bunny of his dreams. LOL He runs in front of me to make sure my path is safe. He's built a den under my kitchen table and has to show me how good he is at chewing up paper daily. BUT, if I ignore him or don't give him a snack when he wants it, he nips me. Of course, me not having a nice coat of fur, am injured in the process. He has improved a little. Now the nips just sting- I think he's only drawn blood once in the last several months. 

    :glare:

     

    I can laugh about it except for the days when I am busy and don't want to have to think about where the rabbit is before I take a step. 

    • Like 5

    Another NPD "special handling required" situation :)

    in The Chat Board

    Posted · Edited by MomatHWTK

    The NPD will keep trying to come up with different ways to achieve the same results until the victim says "no." Then the NPD will try something else. We now get the "Well, since I'm not allowed to send gifts..." garbage. It's like the think there is a "For the Record" recording being made somewhere and someone is going to see how they did "everything they could."

     

    I use a form letter to respond. Copy, paste, send. 

     

    Also, you have to let go of any sentimentality. They will use it. Our NPD spent a year claiming that she was going to sell a childhood home in order to get us to respond. I finally got tired of having to worry about whether we could afford to buy it, how my children would feel if it were sold out from under them, etc. So I broke the news to the kids that we needed to assume we'd never see it again. We worked through our sense of loss and now she can't use the property as leverage anymore. Relative, heirlooms, legacies, appearances, reputation... anything an NPD can use to get to you they will use and they won't care one bit about the emotional harm it does to you or your children. 

     

    (Yeah, I know, bitter much?) :glare:

    • Like 8

    2017 vent thread

    in The Chat Board

    Posted

    I noticed that. Every few years they "upgrade" so you're forced to buy an entirely new system. 

    Mine: Our rabbit bites one person in the house-me! I am nice to him and give him treats, but he thinks he's entitled to bite me because he's the buck of the house. #$%m rabbit!

    • Like 2

    Cashiers or former cashiers, please explain this to me...

    in The Chat Board

    Posted · Edited by MomatHWTK

    Stand in front of your cart so if you can't unload you can move to bagging. I don't think they provide enough training to staff at the register anymore. You have to be in a position to monitor both ends of the process. And, yes! Why would I group all the cold stuff on the conveyor if I wanted one cold item hidden at the bottom of each bag of non-perishables. Sigh. 

     

    At our WalMart, the cashiers always spin the bag ring and check for me before I leave. If they don't I ask. 

    Another NPD "special handling required" situation :)

    in The Chat Board

    Posted · Edited by MomatHWTK

    They leave them on your doorstep and you do NOT answer the door (even if you are home and see them.) Or DH goes and picks them up. They may not be there when he shows up, so be prepared for that.

     

     

    They leave them with another family member and your Dh picks them up after everyone is sure they have actually left town.

     

    I have so much PTSD from my NPD that my kids delete voice mails from her to protect me. I have the best kids ever. : ) 

     

    • Like 1

    experience with DINO 101 (Coursera)

    in High School and Self-Education Board

    Posted

    We watched the videos and would sometimes try to answer the in-video questions together. We did not take any of the tests or do any assignments. (My kids were all middle school or younger at the time.) It is a fabulous class, the instructor is very engaging. Even if my children didn't remember every fact, they learned a lot. It was a great overview to interest them in the topic. 

    For labs, you could perform earth layering experiments or max faux fossils with clay. 

    • Like 1

    Kids/teens who won't speak loud enough

    in The Chat Board

    Posted

    I would address it as a social training exercise. Rather than saying "You speak too softly," say, "If someone doesn't hear you the first time, try taking your voice up one notch." Explain that what is happening is that he hears his voice through his bone structure and the air, but people hearing just through the air aren't hearing it at the same volume. Even though from his perspective it is loud enough when someone asks him to repeat himself it is a social signal that he needs to speak up. If he is willing, consider having him practice taking his voice up one notch at a time so he can experience what an appropriate volume for others sounds like in his head. 

     

    I have to ask my DH to repeat everything he says. He speaks in a mic at work so soft and clear gets it done. Not at home with all the background noise! That might be another thing to point out to your DS. In social settings, especially a restaurant, the normal voice level isn't going to work. Learning to adjust volume for environment might come across better to him than "speak up all the time." 

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