Gingerbread Mama
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Posts posted by Gingerbread Mama
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i already feel something's wrong that all the other boys in his cub scout pack had homework in five subjects last night after their meeting. while i think that's crazy' date=' it also makes me feel like i'm slacking or something.[/quote']
As a mom who pulled her kids out (after years of) PS, and is new to HS'ing I can understand where you're coming from. I bolded how *I* think the above statement *should* read, though ;)
That is, IMO, ridiculous that children have 5 subjects worth of homework. I felt like it was ridiculous while we were in PS. The school day should cover most of what is needed, homework should be used as a review OR as a supplement for a child who needs the extra work. IMO, much of the homework that we ended up with at home was incomplete busy work (seriously, he finished the math problems why does he need to color the picture (that is not part of the math work) on the back? Wouldn't that be to keep him occupied during class until others are done?) We also ended up with many things that could have been done in school, if they didn't have such a ridiculous schedule. Many times, a teacher introduced something then assigned homework. If they hadn't had to rush off to a DIBELS test, or a ThinkLink test, they could have done the work in class and not had homework. So that's my 2 cents worth on that, I think these kids are playing catch up with the work.
Also, they may not be *grasping* the work they are doing. Just because 3 digit subtraction is being taught in school doesn't mean all the kids are ready for it. It doesn't, necessarily, mean ANY of the kids are ready for it (though, IME, there's always the handful that get it and make the rest of us look like slackers for being average LOL) PS doesn't worry whether the kid, individually, has mastered the material before moving on. It just has a schedule that must be adhered to or else all H@!! will break loose. My youngest is a first grader, he still doesn't grasp simple math concepts. When I pulled him at Christmas, they were introducing borrowing in subtraction...he couldn't even subtract 2-1 without counters, he sure the heck couldn't subtract 19 from 27. I talked to many other parents, and while their DC might not be as far behind as mine, they weren't ready for that concept, either.
I think you are being too hard on yourself. I know the test adds pressure, which shouldn't be there, but I'd do my best to blow it off. What happens if he fails it? Does it matter to anyone but you, will they make you do something if he fails something? If it's just a measure, and not going to be used to impose anything on you then I'd just keep plugging along and doing what he CAN do, while slowly introducing new stuff. That's *supposed* to be the beauty of homeschool, I'm sorry it isn't working that way for you. I was soooo relieved to find out we don't have to test here until high school. Like, I can't tell you HOW relieved.
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Timed tests? What timed tests? Like the mad math minute they do every. single. day.:banghead:Yes, the whole timed tests stuff drives me nuts. I just want my kid to read...I don't care if he read X # words per minute. If he knows he's being timed, he does much worse.
I feel the same way. I don't care if my kid can answer X amount of math problems in a minute, I don't care if they can read 475 "nonsense" words per minute...I want them to be able to read and understand what they've read. I want them to be able to handle money and figure out everyday mathmatical problems. If it takes them longer to do it, but they arrive at the correct result, SO WHAT?!
Your posting makes me thankful that homeschooling is legal in this country.:iagree:
He told me the special ed teacher frowned the whole time she tested him.
If it makes you feel any better, I've seen lots of evaluators come through the public school where I used to work...they all frowned, they all seemed unfriendly. The SpEd teachers tended to be very frown-y and negative, as well. Perhaps it's just in our area, but I sort of assumed that to work in that field, you had to have a cob permanently lodged someplace private ;) I've known a handful, an extremely small percentage, of SpEd people who were friendly and relaxed. I was never sure if the job changed the other people, or if the job just tended to draw sullen/glass half empty types.
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I think it *could* be "normal" behavior. I mean, all kids don't do it. But some, especially ones who have low self esteem, I could see exhibiting that behavior. I had terrible self esteem as a child. I can remember feeling jealous and wanting to "burst someone's bubble" when they were happy. I rarely felt happy, it made me sad that other people could feel happy. That sounds terrible, but it wasn't as malicious as it sounds. Mostly, it just made me feel worse about myself because I always saw them as happier/prettier/luckier/more whatever than I was and I then was in a crabby mood because I didn't think I'd ever be that way. My ODS tends to have that personality, as well. DD doesn't. She never has. She has her issues, but tearing others down isn't one of them. I've worked REALLY hard, as a mom, to not sulk or allow my kids to feel that way...but there's only so much you can do, really.
I'd be interested to know what others say to do about this. I don't remember feeling that way with everyone, but I remember a few friends that were closely matched for intelligence/creativity/socioeconomic status that I felt very competitive with. FWIW, if I was diagnosed with anything "special", I've never been told. Now I did test for high IQ as a child, but I don't know that that plays into it. ODS was tested mild/moderate ADHD as a young kid, and he's always been considered average IQ... the only thing that we seem to share is that we both have a hard time feeling good about ourselves. Oh, and I've pretty much outgrown it if that helps. I will still have a knee jerk "Isn't that nice for YOU?" reaction, on occasion, in my head...I just never voice it. Even when I'm not feeling particularly gracious or happy for someone else, I've learned to either fake it in the moment (I usually do feel happy for them later, once I've had time to process it) or say something vague "You must be so happy." Or "Oh, I'd love to be able to do that." and change the topic to a more comfortable one until I feel more reasonable about it.
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If you've read my threads, you know how frustrated I've been with DS8 and you know how I've been looking EVERYWHERE to try to find someone to help him (with not a lot of help from anyone that I've contacted :glare:)
I took him back to the VT, yesterday, to have his testing done. Again, they couldn't complete the testing. This time not because of his eyes, they didn't get that far. This time, it was because he apparently couldn't answer their academic questions. Being as this was partially a neurological developmental exam, they took him back alone, so I don't know exactly what went on. The woman who administered the test brought him out and said that she was sorry, they couldn't do the whole test "on his level" as he couldn't recite his ABC's and recognize numbers to 9... Okay, first I believe he CAN do those things. I'm not faulting the evaluator at all, I believe he couldn't, or wouldn't, do it in her office. I'm just not sure WHY. I'm also not sure how the questions were asked, so I can't try it at home and see if I get better results. My best guess would be that he was not in the frame of mind to cooperate, so he didn't. Which makes me :banghead:
The office is an hour from us. Testing began at 9, so we had to leave a little before 8, which meant we had to get up at 7. That is earlier than he's been getting up, then he got NO outdoor time to burn off energy as we usually do. I haven no idea if that played into the results. He, and his two siblings, also got in trouble before we left because they always goof off and it takes three times as long to get ready as it should. When I had to dig something out of the drain, because they'd knocked it off while acting silly in the bathroom (when all they were supposed to do was brush their teeth/hair and get out), I really gave them a going over. I'm tired of feeling like a ringmaster and I let them know, in no uncertain terms, that I was done. DD cried, of course, and ODS fumed, but YDS rarely shows any outward sign of being bothered by discipline. I do think it gets to him, and his way of showing it is either displaying WORSE behavior or becoming non compliant about something. So, I can totally see him just deciding to glibbly play the "I don't know" game during the test, particularly with his behavior being really off the charts over the last couple of weeks.
The upside is that the evaluator said that the doctor will probably be referring us to a NP for a more formal evaluation. Since I haven't had any luck getting our family dr to get us in with an NP or OT, I guess that's a blessing. OTOH, what if he goes into the NP and doesn't cooperate, can that skew his diagnosis or results? I would hope they would have enough experience to know when a kid CAN'T and when a kid WON'T, but I'm not sure I would with a kid I didn't know at all. Should I try to talk to him about this beforehand (the NP)? ODS's eval was years ago, I don't remember the dr spending much time talking to me beforehand. I think I filled out a check list, but I don't remember everything on it. I'm afraid he'll be diagnosed improperly if he doesn't cooperate, and that would be worse than no diagnosis, in my book. I mean I can't afford TWO evals, so he needs to give them correct information to go on at this one.
Also, would an NP know/see the difference in SPD and ADD? I've read that they can be confused, I really feel that DS tends more toward SPD. I'm not saying he doesn't have ADD, but I think SPD isn't out of the realm of possibility. I'm afraid the NP will diagnose ADD (or ADHD), which seems to be the SOP with NP's that I've had any experience or knowledge of, and we wouldn't be treating the correct or only issue. I don't want to put him on, what I consider, a dangerous medicine if that isn't the only way to help him. Especially, if that isn't what he needs at all. I'm terribly afraid of ADD/HD meds anyway. I've seen too many kids become zombies or then get terrible side effects from those meds that they then treat with more meds (or they play the switching game, "Well, that doesn't work let's try this. Nope, that doesn't work, either. Now try these.") I have to admit, I probably don't want the ADD/HD diagnosis to keep me out of the hot seat on putting him on a med I'm afraid of OR refusing him a med and then being wrong in doing that.
So, now I'm in a pickle. At least someone is doing SOMETHING. I'm just not sure it's the right, or only, thing that should be being done.... Should I go with the referred NP first, then try to scrap up money for an OT eval if that doesn't go well. Should I try an OT first? What to do?
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Your post made me tear up. You could have described my boys, except they aren't as old as your son (and the oldest is quite a big kid for his age, but the youngest is super tiny!) I can feel your frustration!
I'm still trying to iron things out. I will tell you this, though, at least he has SOME interest (sports) that get him out of the house. My oldest has NONE. It makes it very, very hard to find things to get him involved to boost his confidence.
Do your younger kids play any sports? Could he maybe help with their practices? I know I have coached soccer and cheerleading, if I knew a kid who was good at either and enthusiastic enough to come help me with practices, I'd be all over that. Is there a Y near you? I've seen on some of the websites about programs where teens help out with younger kids in classes/sport type things. Not sure what that is called. Or, if you have a homeschool group that does PE, could he assist the younger kids in activities? Seriously, that could really help an adult out! Is he old enough to mentor in a big brother type program? He sounds like he would be great fun for a little boy who needed some one on one attention.
I'm too new to HS'ing to really advise you on academics, particularly since none of mine are in HS. The only things that crossed my mind were -
Is everything he's doing a good fit for him? If he isn't clicking with something, could you try sampling a new program?
Does he have post HS plans? Is he going into a vocational field or going to college....? If he has plans, is what he's taking important to those plans? If not, can you tweak his lessons to follow his goals?
I would think, surely, there are some higher math games? Surely? I don't know what they'd be, I'm not math-y at all.
My DD has anxiety about having to do work over. Her response is to cry and say she doesn't want to do it in the first place on the off chance she might get it wrong. It makes me nuts, but I know she feels it's a legitimate concern.
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I drive at least 100 miles per week for my kids' activities. I live in the city, but the majority of my kids' activities are in neighboring cities.
See? LOL That's what I'm afraid of. I'll manage to get everyone on board with a move to some major city, and then still have to drive all over creation for the kids to do the stuff they chose! :lol:
I thought of you guys today as I drove my son into the city for a drs appt. My car hit 123000 miles. It's 14 years old and I go somewhere almost every day. The car's not even limping yet and I think it's lasted because my trips are so short and I live in a flat area.My DH would say there is something to your theory of why your car has lasted. He does more long haul driving than I do, so he would probably be one to know.
I love that someone thought of my plight, makes me happy! :)
There's a zoo in Nashville, but it stinks.Yeah, it does. What is up with that? DD asked to go on her 6th birthday. We happened to be in the area anyway, so we took her. O.M.Gosh! I was thinking "Are you kidding me?! This is it?" Now, IIRC, it does have a rather impressive wooden castle/play area type thing? The rest of the zoo, though, just wow.
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I drive way more than I want to be driving.
I am fortunate that the majority of the things I do are within 30 minutes. What takes its wear and tear on me is swim practice. 4-5 days a week and it is just far enough to not make it worthwhile to come home during practice.
Yeah. I can see that. That's another point, it's hard to find activities that a 12 yo boy, 9 year old girl, and 8 year old boy could all do at the same time. If I put them in sports the next town over, we'd be driving to separate games and practices for each one. That could easily turn into me driving every day of the week, just for the ONE activity. Bleh.
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Do you get the News Sentinel? It's Knoxville's paper. On the front page today there is a story, "Money, schooling tied to lifespan Study: Some Tenn counties like third world"
I can tell you this is true.
Knoxville is very nice. I would love to live there. I also like Johnson City. I'm sure it's nice to live close to Nashville or even Memphis. Chattanooga is also very nice. But once you are away from those areas gets very rural very fast.
Well, the city that is 2 hours from us is Memphis. It's impressive until you've spent time somewhere that really seems to value educational/cultural experiences (like STL or Chicago)... :tongue_smilie: I don't know, maybe I haven't spent enough time over there trying to find stuff. It just seems like Pink Palace, Botanical Garden, Zoo...done. I will say that the Memphis Zoo has it all over the Nashville Zoo (I thought.) We've talked about moving to Chattanooga, or near to it. By we I mean me and my mom. She is retiring and helps me with the kids while DH is away. I've talked about it to DH but he says his vote is, and always will be no matter where the place might be, NO. Because he doesn't want to leave his hometown.
Our other option would be to go waaay far away to Arizona where my uncle is. He would love us to come out there. I'd love to be closer to the little smidgen of family that I have. The only thing is that, like he said Phoenix is so spread out that it can be like driving to Memphis or Nashville just to go somewhere in the same town. Also, I wish we could move somewhere closer to an ocean, which isn't the BIG thing, but I hate being landlocked. To me, AZ is not only landlocked but barren. At least TN has grass LOL We've talked about moving back to STL, and DH might be able to get a job based out of STL that would have him home more often. FWIW, DH respects my mother and appreciates the help she gives us with the kids. She's the polar opposite from his family so I think he struggles with feeling like he's betraying them by liking her, but he does see that she is invaluable to me. I don't think he'd mind her moving with us (not necessarily into our home but to the same area) for that reason.
I don't get that paper, but I've noticed that in the events section of the Tennessee magazine West TN has very few "events" compared to Middle TN and even East TN. It's like West TN can't be bothered, most everyone I know counts going to a football game as their "get out and do" :D That's so not us. Sigh. I feel like when I've tried to talk about what I want for my kids I get the "just grew another head" stare.
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Well, go figure. Yesterday, it was like all of that went away for the most part. Last night he was totally "human", bad as that sounds. He even sat down and colored by himself for quite a while (and drew a picture, not just scribbled.) Then he asked, "Hey, if I can't watch TV or play video games..can I play a game on Reading Eggs?" :svengo:Then he proceeded to play on RE happily while waiting for his shower. He's still doing some of the siren stuff (now it is a chirruping like a car alarm?) but not anywhere near what he was doing before. I can't work it out. I'm thrilled that he's doing better, I just wish I could pinpoint "why" so that I would know if we were heading towards another breakdown, KWIM? I don't know why it set in, or why it is now gone....
I'm not one to look a gifthorse in the mouth, though. I'm going to enjoy this for as long as it lasts.
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We have both. If I went with the XBox I would get the Kinect and ONLY Kinect games. They are a much better total body workout than most of our Wii games. However, you will need plenty of space to use the Kinect...that has been our issue. I haven't yet found any other XBox games that show any purpose beside "plugging in", nothing educational.
We have a Wii Fit and I should get it out more. The kids like it but it's a PITA to store and I don't want it left in the middle of the den floor. I do think Wii offers more "thinking" games.
So, there's my 2 cents. LOL
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That is just lovely. I know you must be so excited :)
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Yeah, that's my fear. As for prphylactics, if you mean condoms, I've had them break several times. Even with proper use. We must be more "vigorous" than the average user, lol. and yes, we were using them properly...I was a peer educator in college and had to take courses on this stuff so I could teach it.
That kind of made me laugh. Yeah, I meant condoms ;) Hmm, could you double up and use a condom with a diaphram for back up? I don't know...I had a hysterectomy because my uterus fell on my left kidney and caused it to shut down, so that kind of took the birth control issue off the table for us by about 1000 % (DH had a vasectomy several years prior to that, we joke that if we get pregnant we will be RICH, RICH, RICH between the lawsuits and selling our story to the tabloids LOL)
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I think it's a little unfair for your husband to not allow you to have more say given you're home alone with your kids so much. Hope you can come to some sort of a compromise!
I do, too. I'm kind of at the end of my tether with this situation. I also don't think he "gets" it because he is somewhere where there is a lot going on, so when he comes "home" he views it as a break and a welcome one. It isn't the same as stagnating here day in and day out. Also, he isn't a "go and do" person. He doesn't ever check out the local museums, parks, zoos, etc.. until I come with the kids and my list of must sees. He admits when we go that they are fun and good for the kids, but he is just too L-A-Z-Y to go do stuff like that on his own. I love him, anyway :D, but I just don't understand that. I would be a member of EVERYthing! LOL
Another thing, is that his family is so against anything outside their hometown that it is almost a mental disorder. They hate going anywhere, they view other places with either disinterest or outright distrust. DH is in Chicago right now and we went to stay for a month at Christmas. MIL called me in tears one day begging me not to take the children out of the apartment, that I didn't understand what "@$$-----" people in big cities were. She was sure that at the very least the police would take my children from me if they found out that we homeschooled, at the worst someone was going to kidnap and molest them. :001_huh: I think being raised in that kind of whackadoodle mindset colored how DH sees the rest of the world. Much of her family is that way, even a sister who moved to Chicago for many years (she told me at Christmas not to wave at people or say hello, they'd think I was trying to mug them :lol:) They (MIL and siblings) grew up in an isolated rural location and their parents left them unattended for months at a time. I think it pushed some of them around the bend. Anyway, all that to say that while DH isn't as paranoid as his mother, I do think her dislike of anything outside the countyline has impacted him.
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I don't have one, nor do I know anyone who has used one in recent years, so take this with a grain of salt. My MIL had one in '75. She got pregnant with DH while using it, didn't know for several months that she was pg, had it removed at 4 months (I think, she told me this story when we first married, I just know she was fairly far along) and almost lost him several times.
After hearing *that* story, even with it being 20+ years prior at that point, I decided to never use an IUD. Are you saying that you do not want a permanent solution? If so, in your situation, and with my particular fear of IUDs, I'd probably rely on prophylactics.
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We live in a rural area, the only thing close is Walmart (20 minutes) and Save-a-lot (in town). Everything else is an hour: music (lessons and orchestra), sports, church, and any other shopping apart from Wally World.
Honestly, I hate it. I really hate it. My dh loves, I mean loves his job, so we are here.
The driving has caused us to compromise a lot of things, including school. We have to stick to a bare-bones, get it done approach in order to do anything else. I work hard to make sure my kids get the extras (education wise), but it's hard.
Ooh you are in TN too. Maybe it is TN, honestly no place I've looked in our state has has been able to compete with places like St Louis or Chicago.
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Hmm, well, DD and I are redheads. Everyone in our family is fair. We use SPF 45 mostly, and just reapply every couple of hours.
Honestly, my dirty blonde boys and DH are much more prone to burn than DD and I. For some reason, even with red hair, we tan pretty well. DH uses SPF 70 when he works, because he's outdoors. I've not seen anything like him and ODS. They absolutely DO NOT tan. They will cook to lobster red, then go back to dayglo white. I ended up putting the boys in rashguards last year. Best $$ ever spent.
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Hmm, so I'm not the only one making long drives to things. I'm still at the outer reaches of drive time, though. What really irks me, I think, is that I don't consider those venues to be the *best*, either. They are better than what we have here, because we have nothing here. It's just that I've been to a lot of bigger cities with DH's job (St Louis - that was the best and we actually lived there almost 9 years ago, moving was the WORST thing we did, Chicago, Cincinnati...) and I've seen what THEY have to offer. So then driving 2 hours to get to something so much *less* is sort of a let down.
Yes, to the person who said DH assumes that having his family near is a plus. He doesn't get that we will never be close. It isn't a one way street, his brother hates everything I do (He's one of those if you are for it, I'm against it kind of people. So even when it's something GOOD like taking the kids to church, making them eat healthy, etc.. he runs it down in front of them.) He thinks that is just how his brother is and I should overlook it because he is "family". His mother is just, I don't know, we don't click. At all. I don't dislike her really, I just don't want to be around her very often. Funny thing is, DH can't stand her. So....? Now, I'm not totally alone, my mom is here. I have no other family in this area, grandparents are dead and my uncle moved years ago to get his kids into a bigger/better area. I'm starting to realize that my mom is getting older, when she is gone I will really be alone...alone with DH's family :tongue_smilie:That's getting to me.
Unless your boy is in band (and must be in PS to do band) or plays a sport like baseball or football (and, after age 12, must be in PS to do football here) then they don't have anything else to offer them. ODS isn't athletic. He's creative, he could do sculpture or woodworking... he's good with technology. He is good at things like skateboarding/roller blading, but we don't have any skate parks or anything. The roller rink 30 min away is the closest we have to anything like that. So basically we don't have anything to build his interests on here, and even if he WERE into the couple of things open to boys here, he couldn't take part because we homeschool. No HS group here, either. There is one fairly inactive one 40 min one direction, and an active one 30 min in another direction. The problem with the active one is that they do a lot of "for credit" stuff but that is in another state so I don't know that they'd want us taking a spot when we can't use their credit, KWIM? Also, they go on trips to other places. Where it would be an hour drive, or and hour and a half, for them...add 30 min or more for us. So that's kind of a disadvantage.
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Is there any way she could go to a different school? I would think, at 15, it might be traumatizing to go back into this school and go in as a failed student. If it isn't *just* slacking, but could be ADHD/undiagnosed LD/depression, that seems almost cruel to put her through, KWIM?
I do understand what you are saying about lacking any interests that could lead to supporting herself. My DS12 is much like that, I worry about it sometimes. I'm going to PM you because I *do* know someone who failed/had no interests/and has become self supporting, but the details are personal and not mine so.....I doubt they'd want it posted for the whole world.
:grouphug: It sounds like you are between a rock and a hard place.
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Yes, find a decent laundromat and take the clothes there. I got spoiled summer before last, we were staying near a really nice laundromat and I could do a whole days worth of laundry in a couple of hours. I actually hated to return to our house after that summer and see my washer and dryer.
I'm so sorry about your aunt.
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Can your family move closer to dhs work? That sounds like a bigger strain than driving to activities. Why does he want you to live there if he isn't?
Now, I know I sounded cocky with all of my answers up there, but we can't even use the local sports. Dd isn't sporty and ds is in a wheelchair. We're more grateful to live near quality medical facilities. We also appreciate all of the sidewalks and paved bike paths.
I grew up in the country, so I get the advantages, but things have gone so downhill in my hometown (let's call it a town) that moving back there would not give my kids the experience I had. I have nieces and nephews living there and it's nothing like it was 25 years ago.
Well, DH's job isn't really in one place. His company goes in to a city for 9-18 months (typically) and does some work, then moves on to the next city. So for us to be "with" him, we'd have to move an entire household really often. It would also probably necessitate us living in an apartment in each city, something my kids are not well designed to do. They are loud, they are boisterous...we'd probably be getting hate mail from the neighbors. I'd LOVE that sort of thing, but I don't know that it would be good for the kids really. The reason he wants us *here* is that he reasons that this is where WE grew up, it must be good enough for them. That, and he keeps on about how he wants to retire here...he's 36 and hasn't made the kind of money needed to retire early, so I think that's ridiculous. Do what you want in 30 years.
The bolded: that is also a reason I want to move. We have nothing here, medically speaking. We have one hospital that our dr won't even admit to if he can help it...one group practice of GP's and a DO. That's it. Any specialist we have 2 hours to travel usually, sometimes 1 if we can find them in that town. YDS is going to need vision therapy - that will be an hour to the dr's office, then an hour home each week. When he needed to see a pediatric orthopedic doctor, that was 2 hours. When he and my daughter broke bones (at different times, LOL, we aren't THAT unfortunate) that was an hour to the bone clinic. You want a real orthodontist, and we do because DD has major issues with her teeth....? That's an hour away...
I keep telling him this isn't the Mayberry where he grew up LOL I don't honestly know why he considers his memories so wonderful ... his family was dirt poor, his parents were negligent, bordering on abusive. He was every teacher's worst nightmare... it isn't like he has rosey memories to look back on. I think he's just afraid of admitting that this ISN'T the most wonderful place in the world, he thinks that says something about HIM for some reason. I don't get it, never will.
Oh, FWIW, I don't want chickens ;) I just meant that this is like to suburban to be truly rural (therefore, none of those benefits) and too rural to be urban.
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I'm really tired of living in a rural area. It's just suburban enough that we don't really have any "land" to speak of (decent sized yard, but not big enough or far enough out of town for the kids to have chickens or goats or anything..), but the area is so rural that venues for enrichment are limited. For instance, we are:
1 hour from a strip mall, 1.5 hours from what I would consider a "decent" mall
2 hours from a zoo, botanical garden, childrens museum
4 hours from an aquarium
30 minutes from a decent library (there is one less than a mile from our house, but the selection for kids is pitiful) I had to pay for a membership to this library as it is out of state (small fee, though, totally worth it)
30 minutes from anything besides a Walmart for shopping of any kind (big CVS/Walgreens type pharmacy, Kmart, "nice" Walmart - we have one, it stinks)
1 hour from a Target :glare: That one really hacks me off LOL
We are 30 min from a bowling alley/skate rink. So to even do "active" things we have to drive.
Even just "everyday" lesson/group type things:
Horse riding lessons - the closest I've found is 30-45 minutes away
Karate - again 30 minutes
Piano/Guitar - 20 miuntes for the nearest teacher, but only one of my children would do well with this woman. To find someone a bit more "current" in their music selections (as in, something my kids might want to actually PLAY, would be closer to 30 minutes)
Gymnastics - 30 minutes
Boy/Girl Scouts or similar groups - minimum of 30 minutes, up to 1.5 hours We do *have* a group of each here, but I've tried them out and we don't fit in. The GS are far too liberal a group for us, the BS had many problem kids in the troop - I have a kid that is a follower, I don't need kids modeling BAD behavior for him. So, I could try another troop but would have the drive time above.
Sports - 30 minutes away. We have kept trying our Parks and Rec for the kids to play sports. It is very poorly organized by the director and many seasons (the soccer we are *trying* to play now, don't really have enough kids to play) just never really get pulled off. I could take them to a big Sportsplex, that's 30 min away.
Even a church that I feel comfortable in would be about 30 minutes away. The church I grew up in is 5 min from my house, my kids would be the ONLY youth there, though. There is another church 5 min in the other direction that is "the" church for youth, but I find it very difficult to feel at home there. It's too "commerical" or something, can't explain it. I just know most people moved church homes to this church from the last "in" church. I don't like that at all.
I don't know. I just feel very out of sorts being here. I would like my children to be able to take lessons and participate in groups/sports that are well run. I'd like to take them to museums and the zoo without it being an ordeal.
If I put them in everything I want them to do/they'd like to do - we would have to live out of our car. I know we could move even 2 hours from here and be much closer to what I'm looking for. DH doesn't want to move. We both grew up here. He hasn't been here regularly in almost 5 years, since the kids were basically babies, due to his job. I think he has built it up to be this romantic small town in his mind. I also think he is remembering how it was when we were small, and it wasn't quite so behind most of the other areas around us. It's like time has stood still in this town, all around us are these areas that are blooming and growing. Even our own mayor admits that something has got to happen here, the town is just falling by the wayside. Everytime DH and I talk about it, we both end up angry. He says I'm not proud of where I'm from (big whoop), I say he isn't giving our kids a fair chance at growing up with important childhood experiences. My parents did A TON of schleping me to other places so I never grew up thinking this was *it*, DH's family rarely went anywhere when he was growing up. Honestly, a big part of my dislike for living here is that DH's family all lives here and, while HE doesn't mind them dropping by unannounced or popping up everywhere *I* do. I think he would mind it more if he had to deal with it all the time, it's hard to understand how annoying it is when you are only "home" a handful of days a year.... My uncle moved to Phoenix and he did tell me that while they have all these things - it is still a drive for him to go everywhere. Sometimes comparable to the drives I'd be making now....the only upside is they have mass transit and he can sometimes get a "locals" deal on membership/admission. So that got me thinking, how far do other people drive for their children's activities? Maybe what I'm looking at isn't SO bad, perhaps I'm letting my other feelings influence how I feel about the driving.
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I voted other, based on our situation. We have always done two parties if the kids wanted one with friends. We did one for the family, one with just kids. I wouldn't want some of my inlaws around kids :tongue_smilie:because they use bad manners and are embarassing (not MIL/FIL - some of the other inlaws) and it would be hard to invite some inlaws/family and not others. A few years ago my mother decided she would never come to another party with ANY of my inlaws, they acted so bizarre. So now she holds a dinner/cake celebration at her home for each person on their birthday. The kids have pretty much gotten out of doing "big" kiddie parties, we might do something with a friend or two - so if we do that it's another time. After MIL/FIL divorced, interest in going to grandkids stuff piddled out for the most part so I just let that fizzle. Otherwise, I guess we'd celebrate each of their birthdays 3x...
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DS12 (13 next month) is in Men's sizes and has been for about a year or more. Right now he's 32x31 in pants and a medium in shirts. I wish we lived closer to a Plato's Closet.... we've never been to one and the nearest is 2.5 hours away and not in a section that we frequent (so I forget to go even if we are in town..)
This season he is wearing some tees that I got on sale this winter from Hollister. He also likes Aeropostale and American Eagle (I prefer AE, due to quality but usually find more frequent sales at Aeropostale.) For shorts we've done a combination of Walmart and JCPenney. We bought some shorts at Old Navy and then discovered they were not the longer shorts, but a boxy short (think mens shorts of the 80's), it's not a flattering look on DS and he hates it. I ended up taking them back. He prefers plaid or solid twill and he doesn't want cargo pockets. It can be "slim pickins" so we have snapped up anything we found. I will probably also buy him some of the solid color tees at AE, I've bought them for DH and they have held up well/were inexpensive/seem a little dressier than the graphic tees.
I've found shopping in the men's section to be somewhat depressing.
Teaching _____ Makes Me Want to _____.
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
:iagree:
Also, teaching math makes me want to tear out my hair. Don't tell me how hard it is before we've begun, don't tell me how you'll never be able to do this before you've even attempted one problem, and DON'T ask why you'll need to know this (trust me - I've actually USED simple multiplication in my life.) :tongue_smilie: