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OhM

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    Pre-college/ After High School "Fun"

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    :iagree: With the road trip ideas! See the world! (Or the US! Or just your neck of the woods!)

     

    Do you live in an area with many cultural opportunitites? We're close enough to a mid-sized city to enjoy lots of free/cheap theater productions, and close enough to a music school to see some truly excellent musicians (local and more well-known). Your group of friends could become an informal social club to do things together once a month or even once a week. Even if you just had some movie-viewing nights or game nights it could be a blast!

     

    We're fortunate to have made friends with a young couple who is part of a very dynamic group of friends for whom drinking/drugs has never been the focus. (Although now that they are approaching 25 - there is some responsible drinking at get-togethers. In fact, a couple of them are into homebrewing!) The centerpiece of the group is a weekly Bible study, and from that, some very strong relationships have formed.

     

    One last recommendation - read Do Hard Things. My girls and I just listened to the audio version. You are at a great place in your life - with energy and time! - to have a great impact on the world around you!

    Is Times Tales worth the $$?

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    YES!! but only if your child struggles with memorizing the times tables. My DS memorized quickly so it wouldn't have been worth it but my DD just could not remember them and TT was the only thing that worked and stuck. She had them down in about a week. Love it.

     

    :iagree: Oldest dd didn't need the help - she did great with flashcards. Younger dd struggled with facts, but for whatever reason had no trouble instantly recalling the "story". I never understood it myself - I learned them with her, and had to stop to remember the story each time - with her it was instant recall. Some people are wired differently!

    S/O from SAHM lifestyle thread

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    Yes. I have gumption, a positive attitude, resourcefulness, people skills, organizational skills, and the ability to learn quickly. Do I have a degree? No. But, if I had to, I have no doubt I could support our family.

     

    You know, this seems more important than a degree when it comes to supporting your family. You definitely have the skills!

     

    I do have a "fall-back" carreer - engineering degree that I'm fortunate to keep current through part-time work.

     

    My mom supported our family when she and dad divorced for a time during the 70's. She's an extremely intelligent woman who managed to give my brother and me all we needed (if not all we wanted) with secretarial skills she picked up in high school. When computers started to come into business, she learned keypunch and some rudimentary programming, but still never earned more than a support salary. She definitely would have earned more if she had earned the college degree instead of working to put dad through school, but they never planned for the family to fall apart.

     

    Anyway - too late for long story short - she raised her daughter to "take care of herself". I've had to learn what little skills I do possess in homemaking and child-raising on my own because I wasn't raised to do this (SAHM stuff!) Taking care of myself and my kids financially is not my problem. The emotional and physical aspects of taking care of my family day-to-day are the bigger challenge.

     

    It's a balance - and as we all know, there's great skill and worth in homemaking and raising a family. And a lot of that skill can be very marketable!

    Stubborn Tween

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    I was having trouble with my 11 year old, but I too decided to spend special time with her first. I started meeting her needs first (like a toddler) by reading to her alone in my bed every morning.

     

    She has responded to the attention by doing a complete turn around in behavior. Now it's easier to enjoy her, and give her positive attention.

     

    I see that this dd is your oldest. When my oldest was this age, she was very much like this, and I reacted horribly. It became a test of wills; I was really starting to believe that she was an overly rebellious child, and there must be something "wrong" with her - after all, my friends didn't seem to be having those kind of clashes with their kids.

     

    Well, to make a long story short, she's come out the other end (not without some counseling related to self-harming), and she's wonderful. And now her younger sister is "that" age and we're living it all again. Now that I have some experience, I have a boatload more patience, and am able to show love at the right times.

     

    So the above advice could really go a long way - probably not in making it all go away, but helping her through it, and giving you some perspective. Away from the heat of battle, you may be able to gauge better whether this is the "normal" throes of adolescence, or something more.

    sparkpeople question

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    I've been tracking my calories on sparkpeople and I've been doing pretty well. I've been eating only when hungry and have seriously cut back on my mindless eating. I'm trying to take heart in that though I have not lost any weight in 3 weeks.

     

    My question is about the recommended calories per day. Sparkpeople suggests something like 1450-1850 calories per day. I have my activity level logged as little to no exercise. I am 170 lbs and 5'4.

     

    Those calories seem really high. I'm staying toward the bottom of that range but it seems high and I'm not losing AT ALL.

     

    Have others had to adjust the calorie goal down? I just changed it to 1200-1500. That's pretty arbitrary but feels more "right".

     

    I just wondered what experience others have had with this. I'm all for slow weight loss and lifetime changes- those really are my goals this time. It just seems like too many calories allowed.

     

    Thanks,

    Marie

     

    A couple of years ago, I lost ~15-20 lbs over 4 months on Sparkpeople using the 1200-1500 menus. I was usually on the 1500 end of the range, but I lost consistently - not too quickly. Unfortunately, when I quit tracking over the next year and half I gained much of it back. I think if I had switched to the 1500-1800 and just kept track I would have been ok. I'm back on it now - trying again.

     

    I'm noticing, though, a difference in the menus now. They seemed to have more grain servings and less dairy before. Has anyone else noticed this?

    What would you think if

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    Drugs or alcohol.

     

    :iagree: (not that it is drugs or alcohol, but that it's a possibility.)

     

    Went through periods with two co-workers (at separate jobs) where their lives got awfully complicated. Lots of "funny stories" and extenuating circumstances suddenly cropped up. Stories that started with, "You won't believe what happened now."

     

    With both the real issue finally came out into the open. If any new issues crop up, listen carefully - in retrospect, the loopholes were there with both these guys, we (the co-workers) just didn't listen close enough to hear them.

    s/o opinion on education, work, gender and lifespan focus.........

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    I believe we've become child-centered and it's to the detriment of everyone: mothers, fathers and children. Businesses geared to children, marketed to families are a rather dubious luxury item (kids' cooking centers, birthday party places, etc) The over-abundance of classes, sports, expectations of involvement, while they might enrich a child's life, serve as a collective group to make children the out of persepctive focus of time, energy, money, etc.

     

     

    I think the argument could be made that this over-emphasis on children's needs came about as the result of two-career families. The market is now meeting needs that used to be addressed by having mothers at home (cooking with and around the children, planning birthday parties, and so on).

     

    Perhaps the effect you're decrying is a result of a swing back to a more "traditional" (or what is perceived now as "traditional") family arrangement in the midst of this market place that at first sold their goods by convincing families that they are helping busy and overextended parents to provide necessary "quality" time (read: guilt), but now are claiming to be necessary for a child to grow up to be healthy, successful, or even to just have a "normal" childhood!

     

    I think this is an astute observation - it dovetails nicely with the "Gen X parenting" article that was posted earlier today, but I'm not sure that it is the main point of your post?

    Feedback needed from conservative christians--re girl scouts

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted · Edited by OhM
    "just"

    This is funny. We quit Girl Scouts because we are atheist and our troop was too religious. And, my husband had helped out with the troop for years, but couldn't be an official leader because leaders are required to proclaim a belief in God. :glare:

     

    The above poster mentioned this, and I just want to add - this is simply incorrect. Though God is mentioned in the GS Promise (the official position is that girls are encouraged to discover what their own definition of "God" is), there is no requirement for leaders to proclaim a belief in God.

     

    However, I do think there is a rule about men being leaders - I know part of our safety training mentioned that men are not allowed to accompany the troop on overnight outings.

     

    And as for the new Journeys program - our troop (of 6th graders) has made the decision to focus on the "old style" program - earning badges (which focus more on interest and activities) and doing service projects. Yes, we sell cookies, which is our main money-earner, and we also do quite a bit of travel. We get out quite a bit locally and around the state, and we're taking our second "big" out-of-state trip this summer (to Savannah, to see Juliette Gordon Lowe's birthplace.)

     

    So it's all about the troop. I know GSUSA, and by default, our local council, are pushing the new program, but troops make their own decisions, kwim?

    WWYD? Friend situation

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    Actually - this sounds rude on everyone's part except your family. However, I would want to know what was going on before blowing off your friendships. However difficult it may be to imagine, maybe there is a some somewhat rational explanation for everything. Like, maybe the husband was supposed to invite your son, forgot, and the wife thought you'all just snubbed them. It would be a shame to lose a friendship over a misunderstanding.

     

    You know, this is a good point. They might be wondering why you all didn't head over w/them for cake and pizza. :confused:

     

    Then again, the OP said that you did ask about the party when you first heard about it. That probably made it clear that you hadn't heard, and was surely an opportunity to invite you along.

     

    This is so odd - I hope you learn what the story was. (:bigear: and I hope you'll tell us if you do!)

    Do you ever feel like you just can't force things on your kids?

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    There are activities I "force" for a season; otherwise, the kids wouldn't be inclined and/or would lack confidence to try them on their own.

     

    A few activities that I thrust upon my children which are favorites now are nature walks at local metro parks, read-alouds, National History Day, band,

    swimming, ... these are the ones that immediately come to mind; I know there are others, big and small.

     

    We use an e-school (which was suggested by me, and both girls have now migrated to because younger dd liked it so much last year) and though 12yo made the choice to continue with this style of schooling, I do still have to force her to do lessons. And to delve further into the lessons. And to tell me more information in her descriptions. And to write more in her essays. I think you get the picture.

     

    The point is, I force them to try new and different things. I don't force them to continue if they've tried it, and it just isn't of interest to them. I'm seeing a big difference in oldest dd now (soon to be 15) - she's much more likely to try a new opportunity on her own accord than she had been when she was younger.

    Just broke my NY "diet" w/Quiver's famous cinnamon rolls this morning...

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    and it was totally worth it. :D

     

    And I should clarify - it's not really a "diet"; I'm following Sparkpeople's menus and just trying to have some structure and intent to my eating for a while. I've gained back a lot of what I lost 2 yrs ago, and had a particularly undisciplined holiday season.

     

    And it's not really "breaking" it, either, since I found when I lost weight before that allowing treats about once a week helped me stick with it in the long run.

     

    So it's all good, I guess. (Really good. Mmmmmmm....)

     

    ETA: (And I should say, this is thanks to Katie, who helped me salvage the dough last night!)

    Ds' Wrestling Coach Took The Team to Hooters

    in General Education Discussion Board

    Posted

    Going somewhere that *serves* alcohol wouldn't bother me in the least. So does practically any sit-down restaurant. (Doesn't Pizza Hut serve beer?) But I would be very displeased with a *school* trip taking minor children to Hooters. It's inappropriate.

     

    I think a very calm phone call to the school would be quite reasonable. Screaming and ranting, not so much. ;) But let them know that you're disappointed the coach had poor judgment about this, and hope that it will not happen again.

     

    :iagree:

    Hooter's (the restaurant, not the name) has a certain connotation - that is, it sells a particular "brand" that is well understood and distinctive. (As Joanne pointed out when she said her dh "had" to accompany ds's team there.;)) I would think that most public school employees would have some idea that taking public school students to such a place is a recipe for trouble. Maybe not enough to lose your license or even your job over, but possibly enough to see your name in the paper and your integrity questioned. I would definitely make sure the administration heard about it, and I would (calmly) make sure it went up the chain to the top if I wasn't taken seriously.

     

    I also agree with a pp who mentioned that 16-18yo boys choosing Hooter's for dinner is different than the coaches taking them there. I dealt with this exact same issue in my first job when the boss rewarded a couple of 20-something guys for an extra long night of work with a $100 bill and the advice, "Head over to Hooter's and have yourselves some fun."

     

    My problem wasn't with the guys going to Hooter's; it was the boss sending them there knowing that some women in the office already had borderline sexual harassment issues w/these guys. It would have been just as rewarding to hand them the cash and say, "Here guys, go have a nice dinner and relax; you've earned it."

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