Clarita
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Posts posted by Clarita
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18 hours ago, Not_a_Number said:
Interesting. I'll have to think about making a YouTube channel where I just lecture in front of a piece of paper or something, I guess.
The Montessori math curriculum that I had purchased for my kids, the lady sometimes just does the demonstration with her there. She just pretends like the camera is the child and presents the lesson to it. She does do a mix of videos with kid and without kid (she'll fast forward and skip sometimes if her daughter is super distracted). Some parents says that the ones with her daughter does help, in terms of not feeling like the only one who's kid that is suddenly building towers with the manipulatives and actually knowing how much engagement we expect from a child (# of problems done and time). The parents (when she surveyed) thought the solo presentations were enough, coupled with some suggestions on things to say or ways to address a child who is not engaged in an ideal way.
If videos are too difficult . Pictures of the lesson/manipulative setup and showing how those change throughout the lesson (where they move to or whatever) along with the descriptions are also good enough.
I know this is super early in your blog launch (and it is not necessary to be one of the first things you do); however I find a general scope and sequence map really useful. This does not have to be linear in any way just a which things are kind of parallel to other lessons and which ones need to be sequential.
PS I'm now demonstrating counting on to my son. I just supplemented that detail into the adding lesson we were doing in his current curriculum.
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2 hours ago, LucyStoner said:
But who is sexually assaulting men and boys? It’s largely biological males. It’s almost never biological females.
My very limited experience actually, biological females. Anywhere from inappropriate touching all the way to rape. I don't know and I'm not sure if anyone really knows largely who is doing what, because all the men who have told me these stories have never reported these events.
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4 minutes ago, LucyStoner said:
Women who do feel a need to defend some single sex spaces are not often being asked to “compromise”- they are being told they are hateful bigots for not disregarding their own lived reality. I’ve seen that on these boards, and I’ve encountered it in my life.
I hope I did not come off that way. People have different traumas, triggers and what matters to them.
I do get on a soap box for people dismissing the fact that sexual assault happens to men. I knew the support I got and it pains me that some of the men in my life didn't get the same support nor felt comfortable getting that support from anywhere. I also feel the same way when women and trans people don't receive support for their trauma.
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You are not alone. Although I am hoping when I turn 40 a magic booklet will show up to tell me all I need to know. 😛 My only saving grace is that my parents didn't know what they were doing either so the shoes I have to fill aren't big.
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1 hour ago, Melissa Louise said:
Seriously, the problem can be avoided ( or made the problem of individual women, just as good, apparently, given we can't expect penis people to have to hear 'no' ) if businesses are HONEST.
Well biological women can go to men's bathroom/locker room spaces as well. So both women and men in that boat will hear a no.
50 minutes ago, KSera said:I also still can’t see comparing the threat from pervy women to that from men. The fact that one can impregnate and one can’t makes a huge difference to me (in addition to the differences of strength and likelihood of danger). Not to say both couldn’t be traumatic, just that the stakes are much different in one case than the other.
I guess for me the trauma is enough of a threat and danger for me. To me, the stakes to me does not need to be increased to pregnancy for it to matter. I also believe that even just because a person is physically capable of defending oneself does not mean they are mentally capable to defend themselves in the moment. Some people just freeze up in these situations.
I do think some signage would be good to warn people that an establishment is allowing self ID people into the bathroom/locker room of their choosing. I think it should be done whether the company decided this as a policy or whether it is mandated by law.
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35 minutes ago, LucyStoner said:
How many random women are perverts or pose a threat to women and girls? Equality doesn’t mean pretending that females are equally likely to be pervy boundary violators as males are. They are not.
I just don't believe single biological sexed spaces will mitigate abuses. I mean people put secret cameras in these "safe" spaces, certain women feel it's OK to sit and chat with their friends directly behind my toweled body (honestly that feels pervy to me) and pervs have done things to me in spaces where everyone is clothed.
Then, at some point enforcement is an issue. I mean how is anyplace suppose to enforce the biological gender rule ( or have a penis or vagina rule), have a perv sit in these spaces to check everyone's genitalia. (I'm pretty sure that's a pervs dream job.) In that case, I absolutely prefer changing next to a biological male than to be subjected to that.
Of course all these thoughts may come from my own messed up experiences. I'm not an expert at all. It just saddens me how we can't just punish actual wrong-doers and instead we have to resort to throwing other innocent and vulnerable people under the bus instead. BTW I don't know the intentions and the actions of the accused in the video, and I believe that the woman who complained should have been listened to and respected (even if she is to be told that under the law they can't do anything about it).
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36 minutes ago, Catwoman said:
And if anyone here is one of those women who likes to sit around the locker room and chat with friends for an hour or so while you’re all naked, could you possibly at least sit on a towel?
And explain why this is a thing? I mean it may not be as gross as the men's locker room but it definitely doesn't smell like roses in there either.
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2 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:
Do you understand that 'perversions' - ugly way to say fetish or paraphilias - are vastly more likely in males?
I know what official statistics say; however I also know males (especially ones who fully identify as such) are very likely to under-report abuses that have happened to them. I haven't talked with enough men about this to have a good scientific sampling for statistics, but I have talk to enough men to know women can be just as ugly to men as men have been to me. In my talks 100% of the time I am the only person they've talked to about it; that breaks my heart.
13 minutes ago, Melissa Louise said:I have an abuse history with a female parent - it hasn't wrecked my sense of relative risk.
I have had issues with both males and females all strangers. I admit I have a hard time trusting anyone with my body.
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6 hours ago, Catwoman said:
Honest question — How do we, as biological women, know when we are “being played” when we are in a women’s locker room and a biological, non-surgically-transitioned male walks around naked in there with us? How can we determine if that person is a trans woman or just some random pervert getting his jollies by walking around in a women’s locker room? We can’t. We have no way of knowing. And we deserve to feel safe.
On the flip-side how do we, as biological women, know when a random pervert biological women is walking around the locker room getting her jollies on? I don't, I have no way of knowing. And yes, with my life experience, I actually don't feel comfortable in an all female locker room either.
It's wrong for anyone of any gender/genitalia to be a pervert in public spaces. I'd open to a time limit in the locker room and banning of "air drying".
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I don't care too much about who is actually in my locker room as long as they don't have a camera, aren't acting creepy and are honestly there to shower and change. Which honestly shouldn't take more than 15 mins. I have an issue with people hanging out in my locker room naked not changing and not showering just hanging out in all their glory. Then in that case I don't care what genitalia you have I am uncomfortable.
If you just showered and change I wouldn't know what you have going on, because I'm also busy showering and changing.
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2 minutes ago, Garga said:
Well, to clean it properly, you have to do all this. I just want to spray it, wipe it, and be done. I don’t want to do 20 minutes of soaking, create a baking soda paste, scrub with the paste, and then a wipe down with a sponge, steamed rag, and toothbrush. 😄
I’m not the best housekeeper and so I don’t do all of the above, and the stove always is a little crumby or greasy .
Haha perhaps that's why I think it's easy; I've only ever done a quick wipe of the cast iron parts. I will just say the grease proves I cook on my cook top.
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I have a Thermador gas cooktop. It is really easy to clean, but I don't know why your old gas cooktop was hard. If I want to clean the whole thing it's 3 cast iron grills plus a star shaped cast iron for each burner then wipe it up. I don't really have to clean the cast iron parts I just flick the burnt stuff off. It gets hot enough whatever was on there becomes ash.
I have a Dacor double oven as my oven, I like it a lot of recipes call for rotating pans I never have to do that food turns out fine. I like the telescopic oven racks. This was my first oven that I actually used (my mom isn't a cook and her oven was for storage), so I can't tell you how it compares to other ovens.
Personally, now that I have gas I don't feel like I can go back. Cooking is so fast on a gas cooktop versus electric. Plus it imparts that flamed touched goodness on your food when needed. (There's a term for that in Chinese but that is the best English equivalent I can come up with. )
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3 hours ago, Earthmerlin said:
My 11 year old has always been an avid reader but she’s recently reading books at dinner and in the car. I’ve had to put limits on those times since I believe it’s rude to not engage in conversation then.
Set the limits. This was me as a child and getting in trouble for "reading too much" did not stifle my love for reading. There are times when reading is inappropriate. It is a good problem to have, but a problem nevertheless.
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6 hours ago, Scarlett said:
I was not happy with her lack of punctuality. I also found out she had committed to sit with an elderly friend yesterday and did not show up or call.
Oh I'm sorry about this experience. Punctuality and actually showing up was something I had to deal with my first cleaners and as much as I loved their level of clean (had they not quit) I think I would have looked elsewhere if the schedule issues continued.
6 hours ago, Scarlett said:I hated the excess polish she left on .......and she used it on surfaces that aren't wood which is just a greasy mess.
I end up telling people to just clean and not put any of the extras on. It's easy enough for me to put on after they've cleaned and since I have littles and cats I'm kind of picky about the stuff that we use that stays on the furniture. (I forgot to include that in my advice, because I thought that was our family specific.)
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I do calligraphy. It's nice because I produce something but all of it can fit into a notebook and I can recycle the notebook when I'm done.
I also really liked ballet. I enjoyed it as an activity and loved the way it made me look.
If I had unlimited funds and time I would probably get into laying out electronics circuits for people. I'd get a software license and try getting work layout other peoples idea/designs freelance so I wouldn't have to go into work fulltime. (I did that as part of a job before I became a SAHM and I loved that part of my job.)
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I have had 2 cleaning services. We are a messy family - we have a lot of good qualities being organized and housecleaning is not one of them.
1) Payment - usually the cleaning service will set up the price higher for the "first time" or when they haven't been at your house for a while. Once a month counts as being regular.
2) I define the places I want them to clean. For us I mainly want them to clean the kitchen, bathrooms and communal living space. Mostly because there is too much junk in our rooms that there isn't really floor space for them to clean.
3) If you have clutter laying about the cleaning people (unless you pay them for organization services, or it's super clear where things go). They will generally find a box or area to consolidate all your clutter in and clean the rest.
The first cleaning service that I had was about 10 girls who would descend onto my house and clean it. I really loved the level of clean they went to - scrubbed baseboards the works. However they would only clean "surfaces" so all my dirty dishes would be in a pile with all my other clutter. Also the main lady would be present at the cleaning and she was FANTASTIC, the other girls she hired some left a lot to be desired. 1) There were different helper girls each time, and 2) the helpers were not necessarily respectful of my stuff - weren't careful, didn't heed instructions given to them.
The current service that I have is a much smaller operation. It's always the same 2 ladies. They know my kids and my pets. They know where a lot of my stuff goes so sometimes they do put my clutter away. They make my place presentable. They don't scrub the baseboards every time so to speak. It seems like they pick one or two "scrub the baseboard" things to work on each time, then spend the rest of the time doing a good job cleaning. They will wash my dirty dishes, put laundry in the hamper in addition to the surfaces.
The first cleaning service charged me $180 for routine cleaning - I only had them twice before the main lady quit because the business was too much for her life. The second cleaning service charges me $180 for initial clean and $130 on routine cleaning. They both do about 1200 sq ft. of floor space 1 kitchen and 2.5 bathrooms.
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I like Natives. They look and feel like crocs only they look better. I'm just comparing my natives with my kid's crocs. My natives are falling apart after over 2 years of use. They are still useable but there's a decorative piece on it that's falling off and it bugs my husband because he says it makes it look like he doesn't give me enough spending money.
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5 hours ago, fairfarmhand said:
The fact that she didn't want to live with the two of you together says a lot about her awareness of the severity of the issues, and it may be a relief for her to know there will be a resolution to this situation. She actually may have seen this coming more that you have. So don't let "ruining her senior year" hang out in your brain very long. You can't be responsible for that. It may be hard, but it probably won't "ruin" anything.
Just speaking from my experience, my parents stayed together in an unhappy marriage for convenience. If your daughter is saying that, unless finances or whatever will make things different for her, the actual divorce won't ruin her life or year. For me I wish my parents would have gotten a divorce - even if they had decided to do that my senior year of high school or college it would have been better and easier on me.
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3 hours ago, Jenny in Florida said:
So far, though, I have three items to put on this list, none of which is remotely realistic.
- Helping with my (thus far entirely theoretical) grandchildren.
- Raising service dogs.
- Teaching Sunday school at the church I no longer belong to.
To me this list is a list of things that will just force you to get up every morning. Which it seems you are forced to get up every morning as is. I would think of items with more of a long term goal. Think hobby but give it a goal.
Me it would be:
- Learn Copperplate Calligraphy. - I have a vision in my head of how good I want it to be.
- Learn to be a pastry chef.
- Be able to play a Sergei Rachmaninoff piece on the piano proficiently.
The last time I felt stuck in a rut and was just waking up everyday to do my duty bound things, I attempted number 3. I was not successful, but it held me over until I got to a better place and didn't need this.
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4 hours ago, mom2bee said:
But would you say that it's detrimental to learn it @Clarita and @Resilient since it seems that you can't "toggle" between speed reading and normal reading at will?
I would say for me it's just become a habit. So, I can focus on reading and in a way toggle off the speed reading, however that takes so much effort for me that I will end up reading slower than a slow reader. Having read other response to speed reading, I think it was taught at too early an age for me. Whether it was maturity or whether it was reading skill related.
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1 hour ago, BaseballandHockey said:
When I do this, or my cleaning person does this, I don’t put the stuff back. I just put the box in the basement.
Ooo that's a good idea.
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You could ask your cleaning lady to help you with decluttering and organizing as well. I know some cleaning services offer that as a service. My cleaning ladies will put all my clutter in a box or a specific location when they clean a room, then I just take that box of stuff and put those things away. So as long as they come on a regular basis, it's decent.
Another advice that I found helpful is when you pick a place for things (or organization method) make sure the people in your household can follow through. Just make it organized enough as opposed to catalogue ready. For example my kids clothes are not folded in their drawers, because they aren't able to do that - they just get it in the right drawer and location.
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21 minutes ago, mom31257 said:
Best way to transport your clothes and easily move them from place to place?
Best way to keep medicine safe while traveling?
Were there things you put in storage you wished you hadn't?
Things that helped you stay sane while not being in your own house or bed for so long?
Thank you for any advice, especially things I haven't even thought of yet!
Best way to transport your clothes and easily move them from place to place? A suitcase. I would pack about 1-2 weeks worth of clothes - more tops and less bottoms (you can wear bottoms longer before it becomes awkward). You will do laundry on this trip - scout out how to make that happen (laundromat, friends machine, detergent pods).
Best way to keep medicine safe while traveling? I use ziploc bags or "makeup" bags for all my toiletries and medicine (I don't have much just contact lenses and maybe Tylenol). I put all those in a large gallon bag (or similar sized reusable bag) then organize different categories in smaller bags (bathroom stuff, shower stuff, etc.).
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I had my babies at 32 and 34. Absolutely no regrets, I would suggest that to my kids. I got to graduate from college and land a great job with great pay. I lived with my parents until I got married, which I would also suggest to my kids.
Pros:
- I got to go on spur of the moment lavish vacations and look stunning in fancy clothes.
- I paid for my own dream wedding. This greatly reduced the drama because it's my day and also I'm paying for it.
- I established a decent resume for myself before becoming a SAHM, which saves me a lot of grief when dealing with people who think I'm less than because I'm a SAHM. Also takes care of a lot of less than feelings I see some SAHMs have.
Cons:
- I did hear that if you have kids in your teens your body bounces back faster.
I do admit I have been pretty lucky in my life. I think having children in your early 30's is the best time, not because it makes you a better mom, but I think it's a good balance of health/energy and being able to have a frivolous fun time in your 20's.
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Place Value
in K-8 Curriculum Board
Posted
I think there is value in what you are doing, even if it's tidbits on how to interact with your kids with arithmetic. Perhaps we all just wish you wrote a curriculum, because your method seems so successful.