sbgrace
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Posts posted by sbgrace
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He does sound dyslexic to me. Without a doubt I would narrow my choices to an Orton-Gillingham method for him. I'd pick Barton if you can swing it financially. It's expensive (very) but as far as I can tell people get most of the cost back in re-sell. I'd think his future depends on remediating it. I think Recipe for Reading is a book that talks about the OG method but something planned out for you (and for older kids) like Barton would be my choice for him in your situation.
I posted my dyslexia concerns for my son on the special needs board and found a lot of help there. Also, Susan Barton will talk with you about your son (phone or email) for free. She did that for me.
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I will say a prayer. I feel for you. :grouphug:
Ignore if you don't want any input: I've had my share of mystery (now dx'd) issues too. Ours were metabolic--I hope the doctor tested metabolics? In my experience adrenal fatigue issues are almost always (I'd venture always) secondary. I assume they tested vitamin D levels, right?
We also had parasites--particularly in my son. If you want to share what parasites I might have some thoughts (particularly if it was b. hominus or d. fragilis...important information I'd like you to have). If you don't get rid of them please let me know because I know a (prescription, very effective, easy side effects wise) treatment that I think is the single best chance to get rid of even the most treatment resistant parasites. Our doctor figured it out after we failed two (much worse side effects) treatments.
Praying the end of this is easier than it has been so far and that you come to good health on the other side. :grouphug:
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I'd do goggles.
I want to cook three months in advance too. Because of my son's (new and life threatening) allergies I have to make every single meal from scratch. The issue is I'm spending much of the average day cooking, baking, etc. and I hate it.
Are there certain things you've found don't freeze well?
How many hours does it take you (average) to do it and how much freezer space?
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The sudden onset does warrant looking into PANDAS. The definitive thing in my mind is if he's had mild symptoms and the stress made them flair or if this is really sudden onset severe OCD.
Hugs to you and your child.
OCD is a monster. The faster a person gets help the less ingrained (and severe) it gets in general. So try to get him into a therapist fast. You only want one who does CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) with kids with OCD. This is not a talk therapist type issue so you need one who does OCD. The OCD foundation http://www.ocfoundation.org/ will have a list on their website of therapists who treat OCD in your area.
There are some good books on pediatric OCD. Freeing Your Child from OCD by Tamar Chamsky would be a good start. There is a yahoo group for parents with kids with OCD too. I can't remember the name but several authors on pediatric OCD will answer questions there and there is lots of good support from other parents as well. Try to read up on OCD and get into a therapist fast because some of what you might do to try to help him will actually make it worse. (Example: telling his thoughts to go away or answering them reinforces it. It's about impossible for a parent though to not try to help their suffering kid. You just need the information so you can do it in a way that's really going to help him (which won't feel great for anyone unfortunately). :grouphug:
If my son shows signs I plan to try inositol with him (along with CBT) to see if that can kick it before moving to SSRI type drugs but I would do them in a child if needed for OCD. You might go ahead and look into Inositol use in pediatric OCD now and see if you're comfortable trying that with him. I would in a heartbeat if it was my son. It might be hard w/him in school as it needs to be dosed three times per day and is in powder form. But it can really help dramatically.
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More great ideas! Thank you!
LarlaB, I hope this thread was helpful to you too. It helps me both with ideas and also to know other parents have been there (or are there in your case!) and "get" what I was trying to describe about a kiddo being born to direct everything!
I think this personality will serve our kids well in life especially if they can also learn to be gentle with those who don't easily fall into line!
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Thank you all very much for such helpful responses! So many of you were just "right on" and provided a lot of wisdom. Thank you.
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It sounds like I've written him off? Really? I've not written him off at all. He's a great kid. I could list all kinds of great things about him but I wanted advice for this particular area. We've all got weaknesses and strengths. Actually, this aspect of his personality has lots of good things about it--he clearly states his position, he's not a follow the crowd type, he's self directed, he's not overly emotional and keeps his head about him in nearly any situation, and on. But the flip side of that is that he can come across in a way that is going to be off-putting to others.
My signature line might not be clear I guess but he's six.
I'd like to help him learn to interact/make requests in a less demanding way.
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How do I teach a child who is naturally bossy to be polite and stop making demands on people? His personality is ESTJ if that means anything to those who know Myers Briggs types. He was born directive to put it mildly. A snip of ESTJ childhood characteristics from this site:
http://www.personality-power-for-everyday-living.com/Parenting-skill-estj.html I really don't think we created this and his sibling is the exact opposite.
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In play, they naturally want to be the "boss of you"
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Strong need for people interaction...strong
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Pre-school and early school the ESTJ can be bossy, domineering, pushy
I know I'm not going to change his basic personality drive (nor would I want to do that) but I want to modify the rough edges. We've talked, modeled, talked more, gave consequences, had him rephrase, etc. and nothing sticks for long.
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In play, they naturally want to be the "boss of you"
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Allergy meds work best when they start before the season and go through the entire season. My son takes quite a while to get back if we miss a dose. Allergy meds don't control all his symptoms though with his worst outdoor allergens. So there is a certain point in the spring and summer seasons when he'll be particularly bad even with meds. I wonder if it's possible the allergen profile shifted on your daughter (here we are moving to grasses from tree pollen I believe) and the new allergen might be harder to control. Time will tell on that. If it's a cold it will subside and if it keeps going you'll know it's allergies instead. My son can tell me the difference--I don't know if your daughter is old enough to tell you if her nose is itchy?
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I actually don't think you have to do anything formal for K (great books, cooking together, exploring nature, etc.) is wonderful. FIAR always has great reviews and would be something to check out (I didn't go this direction but considered it).
My biggest recommendation is RightStart Math. It's fun and gives such a great foundation for math. Of course at K you could certainly just do lifestyle math for free. But Rightstart is a really good program.
We used Handwriting Without Tears for handwriting and I like it--it's a very solid program and fun (especially if you use the extras).
For phonics we started with Headsprout. It's got great reviews (homeschool reviews.com) and my kids absolutely love it. I've got some uncertainties with the program (one of my kids was memorizing). We added I See Sam readers and they love those and it's a great curriculum (and cheap). I highly recommend them no matter what else you use (and they could certainly be stand alone..which is what I would do if I could do it over at this point). ABeCDeDarian is a solid program I might have used had I known of it/known how reading was going to play out here.
For all the rest we use Heart of Dakota (it's got a lot of Bible so might not be for everyone) and I'm pleased with it--there is lots of variety and hands on activities. That covers our other non-core areas like literature, art, bible, etc. I recently found Karyn Henley's bible curriculum and they are lots of fun if you're looking for anything bible related.
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I'm using the same curriculum. I hope that continues for some time--I'd hate to juggle multiple curriculum choices per subject just in terms of prep time and cost.
My twins are incredibly different--in personality, learning style and academic needs. So I'm selecting curriculum that fit a wide range of learning types and needs. When we run into issues (one is struggling with phonics for example) I'm picking curriculum based on the one who has the particular needs.
We do certain aspects together (science, history, literature, etc.) but the core subjects I'm finding easier to take turns even though I'm doing the same lesson twice. So far the things we're doing for those (Rightstart, I See Sam readers and Headsprout, HWT) are not long lessons so it's working out fine. This allows me to tailor the instruction (pacing, detail, etc.) to each child. It also allows the one who struggles more less opportunity to compare himself to his twin.
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I can't find the book/author. I'll keep looking. But the consistent finding is that the one biggest factor is spiritual training (and modeling) in the home by parents. Barna has some good books on what's important (spiritual formation wise) in raising kids http://www.amazon.com/Revolutionary-Parenting-Research-Shows-Really/dp/1414307608/ref=pd_bxgy_b_text_b I liked this one.
Revolutionary Parenting: What Research Shows Really Works
The Revolution is underway, but in this new era, how can parents make a lasting impact in the spiritual lives of their children? To find the answer, George Barna researched the lives of thriving adult Christians and discovered the essential steps their parents took to shape their spiritual lives in childhood.What you do at home is what matters--have a family prayer and bible study life, model what it looks like to live your faith. Pray for your kids. What they see in their parents has been shown time and again to be the biggest predictive factor. Barna keeps finding that the early formation is most important (I keep seeing age nine). Not that transformation doesn't happen older--God can do anything--but what you're doing now is vitally important for what happens later and so it's good you're thinking about it now.
edited to add: it's that Soul Searching: The Religious and Spiritual Lives of American Teenagers book referenced above.
(they base this on their research)
But I don't think you need to read that one as much as realize it's your family life and what you model and do now that is the determining factor and put all the energy into that now. I'd be more inclined to read books (like the Barna one) that show how to carry that out at your children's ages now. Books about how to deepen your own spiritual life (like Celebration of Disciplines by Foster) or family devotions stuff might be good choices too.“ …we think that the best general rule of thumb that parents might use to reckon their children’s most likely religious outcomes is this: We’ll get what we are.’”I think the solid research (Barna etc.) is showing it's not church attendance per se but rather parental influence. Maybe the stats you're seeing show parental involvement and that translates to home. But church programs, youth groups, etc. haven't been shown to be the determining factor.
I of course want to add that there are certainly kids with no home spiritual life modeled, older teens and adults, etc. who have a transformative spiritual experience and live that out in their adult life even though spiritual seeking/living was not modeled at home. My husband is one. They are just the rare ones.
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My spectrum son is much younger so I don't have suggestions for curriculum. I am a former public school (Jr high/high school) teacher. I'm so glad you're bringing your son home just because of the bullying alone. :grouphug:
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The best program I found is RDI (Relationship Development Intervention). It's a developmental approach. They have gone back developmentally from birth and identified all the steps neurotypical kids make that are missing in spectrum kids of all stripes. The program helps the child make discoveries in those areas. http://www.rdiconnect.com/blogs/rdi-culture/archive/2010/04/19/what-is-rdi.aspx
It's not a quick fix but works great with homeschooling and my son has made lots of progress. It's the most comprehensive program I found for actually improving autism related areas in my son. For example, he would rarely reference our faces for information when he was confused (let alone something more complex like pick up that the person speaking might be using sarcasm based on tone of voice and check their faces to see if they are joking). Now he does that naturally in life and it's completely due to discoveries in RDI. Our insurance covers it as we are fortunate to live in a state that covers autism related therapies via insurance mandate. I know not everyone has autism therapies covered via insurance. It has been far less than things like weekly OT or speech. I'm sure it varies by area. It's far less expensive than ABA (which I personally couldn't see using with a 10 year old Aspie).
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I do think vocabulary is caught when heard. So you want to surround them with vocabulary. Though in childhood their brains are sponges you might find you pick it up too!
Since you struggle in this area I'd focus on good quality read alouds and also audio books.
There are some free high quality and classic works here: http://storynory.com/
You have a mix here (some with lots of vocab and others more simple) http://www.kiddierecords.com/ for free.
http://librivox.org/ is a little hard to search but has children's recordings and is free too.
Most libraries have some good audio books as well.
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I would love something that goes through the bible with all the important stories/concepts covered. Revolutionary Parenting has a (well researched) list of the scriptures that most parents who raised spiritually active adults said were the most important. Those would be my dream things covered along with other stories and concepts of course. Sort of walk through the bible form. I think suggesting picture story bibles that also cover the scriptures being covered along with the scripture that can be used directly from the version preferred would be my desire. You could have different story bible suggestions for various age groups (and the scripture too for those of us who do both or those opposed to story bibles) for each lesson.
So you would have the story, music if possible (lots of great CD's out there), scripture memory (suggested by age group perhaps) with activity, and some idea (craft, experiment, discussion, journaling suggestion etc.) to make it come alive for various age groups. Family prayer is so important too of course. For olders family and individual devotional suggestions might be nice. I think it would be hard to do a curriculum that covers old and very young kids all in one shot though.
This would be my dream bible curriculum and when you make something anything like it please let me know!
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:iagree:The Jesus Storybook Bible is good. I do prefer more realistic pictures, but the content is great. It came with CDs so my 6yo will read along with them during his rest time.
I'd also recommend The Family Time Bible in Pictures by Kenneth Taylor. We read it last year when my dc were 5 and 3. The paragraphs are short and the pictures are more realistic and on every page, but it still includes many stories not found in board books or toddler Bibles. We've moved on to a more wordy, less picture Bible for my 6yo (Egermeier's), but I'm going back through The Family Time Bible with my now 4yo this year.
I just want to mention--The Family Time Bible in Pictures is extremely realistic. So much so it is sometimes quite upsetting to my very visual and sensitive spectrum child. We use it. I keep it up and don't read certain stories. It's that upsetting to him (the pictures are what are upsetting). It's not my favorite but I know many love it. Do look because it has a completely different artwork style than the Jesus Storybook Bible (and message emphasis too...) and might be more what you personally want and the wording is what you were looking for in amount.
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I have ideas that are a bit more than I think you want and ideas that might not be quite what you want either in the other direction I suspect. But I'll pass them along anyway.
We absolutely love that Jesus Storybook Bible mentioned above too. It's our current favorite. I tear up reading it often. Beautiful. But I'm not sure if it has too many words to hold the attention on the page for you and unfortunately I don't think you can preview it on Amazon. The pictures are nice and colorful (often full page w/ the text there too) but it has more paragraphs per page than you might want--I opened to a random page just now and it had four paragraphs (about 2/3 a page of writing) on one page. But it's not a waste to get it and try because if not now in time I think they will love it. It's just a really great storybook bible. That said, I think (based on my own child with, I suspect, similar preferences and "wiring" as your kids and the same age as your oldest) that it might possibly be too much wording right now especially for the youngers.
We also did this one:
http://www.amazon.com/Beginners-Bible-Karyn-Henley/dp/0310926106/ref=pd_cp_b_1 This is an older version by Karyn Henley. You can look inside and see what you think about this one. There is a newer version with a different illustrator and author but same title (and cover I believe) and publisher but based on reviews you really want the older one. I had to buy the Karyn Henley one used. There is about one paragraph per page on average. We really like this bible and I think it might be enough to hold the attention of the older without losing the younger (middle at least if not youngest) if you think the artwork is enough.
We loved these books (we have all four volumes..some I really had to search for at the time I purchased) especially when they were younger but it's even more simple wording (very memorable though) and you might not like the artwork either. http://www.amazon.com/Read-Aloud-Bible-Stories-1/dp/0802471633/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1272234162&sr=1-7 It may be too little but do consider. My spectrum kiddo especially loved these because of the wording capturing him . Do look. You might not like the art but I believe the wording is short and will engage them--especially the youngers--better than maybe any other choice. It might be too young for the oldest though. My same age spectrum child still likes them, his neurotypical twin is ok with them but he's ok with any book and they wouldn't now be his choice. I think they would be great for the younger ones.
The middle one I mentioned, if you like the art work, is the closest I have to what you're wanting.
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I don't find it puzzling at all and I don't see why anyone would.
It's a hobby and creative outlet. I don't see it as different than knitting or painting or anything else. It's cheaper than many hobbies really. Sure, small portion of people can certainly get over-involved or obsessed with anything and do it to the detriment of other things (think golf or fishing for some, internet addictions, people who spend money they don't really have on collections, people who watch tv to excess, etc.). Why would scrapbooking be any different?
Nestof3--I'm glad you posted to this thread because I took a look at your blog and I love your scrapbook pages (and cards). They are absolutely fantastic. Wow!
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When I used Little Hands my kids were (academically) beyond the program. It sounds like your daughter was too. I knew they belonged in the other program academics wise going into it but I really wanted to do the bible portion of Little Hands. So we did the bible stuff (happily) and I did my own phonics, writing, and math. We do all of Little Hearts though my kids are still doing their own phonics, writing and math as I liked the curriculums I was using.
There is more reading to Little Hearts (you reading selections to the child). There is more to the curriculum instruction wise for sure:
bible story or reading (history as time goes on)
another something (science activity or reading, drama, art, etc….I don’t know if you’ll love these if you hated Little Hands as it’s sort of similar and it’s not my favorite part of the program.)
sometimes another reading (devotional for example)
bible verse memory with an activity to help practice it--some are unique, some are repetitive (not that I’d expect someone to come up with a unique activity for each and every day). My kids like them; I like that they are memorizing scripture.
CD with verse to music (my kids like this).
handwriting or fine motor and/or thinking skill workbook activity (I'm doing the prescribed fine motor/thinking skill book activity but my own Handwriting so I don't know how advanced her choice is).
literature (we love this part)
reading instruction (phonics at her level)
math (we sub this as I wanted to continue RightStart and I've never tried her math selection to comment on it)
There are less of the act out the story activities. I still see that but not so often and it's often (though not always) different to me than it felt in Little Hands. For example they might use stuffed animals to represent Mr. Toad's family and they act as Mr. Toad to warn them of danger--a kiddie way to narrate a chapter out of the literature curriculum). It still has rhymes with motions like Little Hands did. I don't know if they are more complex or whatever because I didn't do them often with Little Hands. We're doing them w/Little Hearts.
I liked the bible better in Little Hands. It seems more skimmy now to me. Of course she’s covering more ground in this curriculum to get to the history portion. I knew what it would be and that’s why I did Little Hands bible. I like everything else better in Little Hearts.
I think the issue with it being beyond her will be largely solved. However, it’s the same author of course so you’re still going to see things at times like you saw before, particularly in the “another something†box in the curriculum. I think you likely won’t love that part based on what you wrote but it's been too long for me to compare the complexity to Little Hands. I don’t love that part but I don’t hate it and I do love the literature and some other aspects. In short, I really think it would be good if you can take a look at a guide. I think you’ll get a feel really quickly for whether it’s a good fit.
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This thread really jumped out at me because I tried and failed to use HOD's Little Hands to Heaven this year.
I wanted to like it; I really did. I knew going in that I wasn't a big fan of the finger plays and rhymes, but I figured I could just ignore those and do the rest.
In fairness, we tried some activities that *I* was not excited about, but that my dd-4 ended up really enjoying.
But I just have not enjoyed the program at all, and it sadly dropped away. I truly cannot put my finger on what I did not enjoy.
And now I find myself looking for a kindergarten curriculum and wondering if I should give Little Hearts a try, or if it would be deja vu all over again.
At the risk of highjacking this thread, does anybody have any advice for me? Anybody out there not like LHTH but enjoy Little Hearts?
Little Hearts is very different (to me) than Little Hands. But since you can't put your finger on what you didn't like I think it's hard to say if the same "whatever" will be off for you with Little Hearts. Is there anyway you can look over a guide?
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That was it! Thank you!
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I ran across a program a while back and I can't find the bookmark I had assumed I made. I believe it was a writing program (composition type writing I think) and had several levels. But the beginning/young child level was all oral. I remember it involved the child and parent making up a story together (you add, he adds, you add) and you made decisions together about choices you made in the story, sound effects, etc. I know that's probably too broad unfortunately but if anyone has any ideas of what this might have been I'm certain I'll know it when I see it.
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I don't have time to read through all the replies but I'd suggest:
High dose vitamin D (since most are deficient and that will affect energy). A healthy adult can safely take up to 9,000 IU of D3 per day indefinitely. Do check on the thyroid (T3 and T4 levels too).
If you need an actual natural antidepressant I've seen great results with 5-HTP and with Inositol. Either are good options.
Please look at these phonics/reading/spelling options for stuggling teen (dyslexia??)
in K-8 Curriculum Board
Posted · Edited by sbgrace
AprilMay,
I'm really sorry you can't do Barton (we can't do it financially right now either, I get it..I feel especially bad for you given his age).
What I planned was to get the book ($25) Recipe for Reading and try to create my own program. I'm trying some other stuff first because my son is young and I've still got questions about what I'm dealing with (side note: I've learned a lot about dyslexia and I'm certain you'd be told he's dyslexia by Susan Barton...she'll talk to you without you buying her program/she did for me). It is written for young dyslexia but I would assume (I've not read the book) the OG principals are the same no matter the age. This site has tons of wonderful information for you.
http://www.dys-add.com/
There is a yahoo group for dyslexia and I know someone there posted about Recipe for Reading which is how I found out about it. It would be the cheapest route but most work for sure. http://groups.yahoo.com/group/HeartofReading/?yguid=200541244 They might have some suggestions for you outside of that as well. All About Spelling for instance is going to be mentioned on the front page of the group.
Dyslexia isn't the same as visual tracking etc. issues (I don't think the other poster was saying that...just for clarification) and since he's reading I don't think you'd find major issues in that area. I'd want to address what you know is major given his age ASAP and that's the dyslexia stuff. I'm pro vision therapy when it's needed by the way. My kiddo did have tracking/conversion issues and we did do vision therapy. However, that is $$$ as well and time and that stuff had/has nothing to do with the dyslexia component nor will it address it. Therefore, I wouldn't throw my money or time in that direction in your place without very good evidence it's my primary issue. In this case the dyslexia stuff is your primary issue.