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sbgrace

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Posts posted by sbgrace

  1. I've read Transforming the Difficult Child (I love the nurtured heart approach for all kids and especially for those who are special needs or otherwise challenging). However, I think the author's newer book All Children Flourishing is a better choice to read. It's better written (less repetitive) and fleshes out and refines the nurtured heart technique he created. It's evolved over time (gotten better I believe). But the approach is wonderful.

     

    I think DD5 has an underlying condition. It might be autism (it looks differently in girls and autism doesn't mean antisocial or a lot of the stuff we think before we see it can be our kids). It might be OCD. But you need a very good evaluation (developmental pediatrician or neuropsychologist would be choices for evaluations..you want someone who knows autism backwards and forwards as it's harder to accurately diagnose in girls). OCD treatment would be cognitive behavioral therapy and perhaps medication (I would look into inositol which is an over the counter supplement which can help OCD for kids prior to SSRI's). Inositol would be useful for anxiety as well. People here can help with ideas and resources for autism should that be the underlying diagnosis. But until you know what the issue is it's going to be hard to help her.

     

    DD6 also needs an evaluation (something is clearly going on there too) so you know what you're dealing with for sure and can make informed decisions. Likely the nurtured heart approach will be a great help for her. It's fantastic for dealing with impulse issues and behaviors like you describe.

    :grouphug: This is extremely challenging. You're a good mom. I can tell. :grouphug:

  2. I'm so, so sorry for your loss of Lauchie. I know it is a shock.

     

    My brother in law was killed in a car accident (work related) about four years ago now. My sister found a lot of help with this forum--it's for young widows (or widowers) and I think it was most helpful to be able to communicate with others who really knew the pain of losing a spouse way too soon. http://www.youngwidow.org/

     

    My sister was able to donate Tom's organs as well and it does help. Time helps the most. All my love to you and your family (sincerely).

  3. I'm that way too. We've had some run-ins with some nasty and hard to treat parasites that made me a lot more aware of this stuff. Prior to that I would have felt differently. I couldn't get my hubby to remember about putting food we'll be eating on plates instead of counters. I put a dishtowel on the counter and change it frequently. He seems more likely to set things on that as it's no more trouble than putting it on the counter. I still prefer a plate and he more often remembers that too as I think the towel reminds him.

     

    The sand definitely needs changed! I don't think that part is over the top at all. Two different specialists (w/ my son and the horrible parasitic infection) told us to immediately get rid of outdoor sandboxes.

  4. Another vote for vitamin D. I will be surprised if you're not low (you want to be in the 50's optimally and no lower than the 40's which is a sub-optimal level, lower is low). You want a 25(OH) D test. If you hate doctors to the extent you just won't get around to getting D levels tested, supplement aggressively. The average healthy adult can take 9,000 IU per day indefinitely of D3. So find a 5,000 IU D3 and take two a day 6 days a week. Continue this for a couple of months and I suspect you'll feel better.

  5. I brought my lunch when I was teaching. Many, many students did as well though I would imagine not our free reduced (or hers). At our high school though there was a salad bar option and always a sub option so those (depending on choices) could have been healthy. I think you could cobble together a healthy and edible meal at our school.

     

    I don't think the average person eats more healthy at home these days though they do eat food that tastes better.

     

    I ate a peanut butter sandwich often as a snack when I had a late lunch and early prep. I see she keeps peanut butter in her desk. Now that I have a child with anaphylactic allergies having PB at school doesn't seem smart to me. I can't imagine there is no peanut allergic individual in the high school (mine or hers).

  6. You might not be able to find this locally either (depends on areas it seems) but we use California Baby Super Sensitive Shampoo & Body Wash. I've never seen it at Walmart but sometimes local mom and pop type places carry it here.

     

    Those are pretty common allergies so I'm really wondering if there are some widely available options for you though I don't know of any (our allergies include non-top eight).

  7. It is true you want to intervene as fast as possible as it becomes more ingrained as time goes on. Seek someone who does Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT..the effective therapy for OCD) in kids. Try to do this very soon. If he needs meds to make him able to do the therapy I'd do that. However, I'd look into insitol as a first try in that case (it's a b vitamin that in high doses seems to help OCD similar to SSRI's without the side effects and that includes in pediatric populations in my research).

     

    As natural as it is (and it's what he's seeking) reassurance plays into and feeds the OCD in the long run. There was a recent study showing that when parents helped (say, by assuring the child their hands were clean) the OCD got worse. I found that true in my own life. The key to defeating OCD is to accept the uncertainty. Seeking reassurance is actually a compulsion and giving into compulsions makes the obsessions stronger. It's really easy for parents to make getting better harder in their attempts to help a struggling child. That's true even for me and I know about OCD and that reassuring my child or "helping" him in ways that feed the obsessions is detrimental in the long run. That said, you need professional direction and support on handling this in a way that isn't too anxiety producing for him and also doesn't make things worse.

  8. Mito is really difficult because there are so few doctors with enough knowledge in the area. There is a really good mito doctor in Houston. Her name is Koenig (I believe I spelled that correctly). I don't know if she sees adults but she has a terrific reputation and would get the ball rolling for your kids (and likely you too if my experience w/my son and other doctors is any indication).

    What were you taking? My son takes three things (and the form of coq10 matters a lot--tischon corp from epic4health). I'm happy to help if you would like my input or thoughts, information, anything. Feel free to pm me or email me or anything.

     

    :grouphug:

  9. I was wondering if it's mitochondrial disease too because you mentioned having so many different body issues which is a hallmark of mitochondrial issues. My son and I have this (assumed my other child does too but asymptomatic so far). I'm not sure what treatments you're talking about but if it's mito and the mito protocol the answer is yes for sure and I'm happy to talk with you about your concerns or anything or about mito if that hasn't been mentioned to you. I know there are some clinical trials going on and what I know about them I'd do them in a heartbeat but I don't think they are open to those without a firm diagnosisv via biopsy and from certain centers. There are mito treatments now and some exciting ones on the horizon in my understanding. I don't think mito will kill me and I hope it won't kill my son either. I think there is hope with this.

  10. When: From the time they ate the same food as us, which was 9-18 months.

    How: What is put on the table is what you eat or you go hungry, I try to make the salads appealling and appetising, visually and taste wise. Mine love salads, scarf them down. I've never got how kids don't end up eating them, a friends children (3 & 5) refused to eat a salad I prepared when they came to our home. I was quite perplexed as it's one of our kids favourite meals, so I just assumed all kids like it. I guess they just don't get presented it early and often like mine have.

     

    I've got a child like yours. He loves salad and eats and enjoys foods of all sorts. While I can name some things he doesn't particularly like he's easy to feed. And he's got a fraternal twin brother like your friends kids--not just about salad he's plain picky! I think had I only had child #1 or two like him I'd think it was because of the way I presented food or something else I did. Because of his brother I know a lot is their internal wiring!

  11. She may have developed strictures in her esophagus possibly due to acid reflux.

     

    Keep her calories up with smoothies etc as a previous poster suggested.

     

    Strictures is my thought as well. Spit swallowing issues, though, sounds a bit muscular but I would think you'd see issues in other muscle areas.

     

    I'd look into pediasure as well as smoothies. The pediasure will have vitamins/minerals as well as protein/fat/carbs in a good ratio.

  12. The thing is that cooking in most gluten free cook books is going to call for special ingredients, flours, etc. that I can't see purchasing to cook for someone once a month or whatever. They are expensive and in many areas not readily available and there is a learning curve to more complex gluten free cooking and baking.

     

    If I were this woman I would not at all feel comfortable trusting people to prepare my food gluten free. For one thing cross contamination of utensils, pots/pans, and things like toasters is a major problem. Even a little bit will hurt her. Does she want this or feel obligated to keep up church expectations. Maybe there is a better way to be of service to them than Sunday meals?

     

    Tinkyada pasta is really good! But the easiest way for people to cook safely for her would be meat, veggie, potato or rice meals with fruit for dessert. You'd also need to provide them with information about seasoning gluten free. That's what I would suggest people do as it's lowest risk for her and the lowest cost and trouble for them. You could also see what gluten free boxed options might be available at your local grocery.

  13. I have issues with it because his thoughts are contradicted by science. I believe God is truth and reality therefore how he created the earth will be supported by scientific discovery, not contradicted. If it's real that has to be true. So to explain away findings about the age of the universe with thoughts such as God created it to look like it's old when it isn't (or something along those lines..it's been a long time since I rejected their thoughts) really bothers me. It bothers me because it makes it look like science and belief in God are contradictory and they aren't. What happens when a child taught these things goes to University and realizes that scientific fact dosen't support what they have been taught. They either run away from that and reject it and close their eyes which I saw a lot at a Christian university or they reject their faith which I saw as well. In reality I believe the bible is being misinterpreted and so it's sad that it appears to contradict science when it doesn't. I love the Reasons to Believe people. They show that science and the bible are compatible.

  14. http://www.vitamindcouncil.org/health/deficiency/am-i-vitamin-d-deficient.shtml This describes why you need a level much higher than 30. You are very deficient. So was I and my doctor gave me misinformation too.

     

    You want a D3 supplement and I would (and did) take 9,000 to 10,000 IU per day until I got it in the right range. You want a level above 50 (and probably below 80 but that's not a concern in this case or most any case!)

  15. Make sure you're taking vitamin D3. The prescription forms are not D3 and will not raise levels as fast (and they've got other issues). The vitamin D council is a great resource website for learning about vitamin D including the need to use D3 to correct deficiencies.

     

    I did 9,000 to 10,000 IU per day and corrected very quickly (under two months).

     

    My pain and fatigue (mine was fatigue) went away and I suspect yours will as well.

  16. We've dealt with this too. You've got good advice on trying to find alternative things she can do to meet that need.

     

    I just wanted to mention that sometimes it's a medical issue, especially if it's new or increased. That can commonly be a zinc or iron deficiency (zinc here), a bacterial overgrowth or parasitic infection (which can happen because of the hands in the mouth easily and causes more of the same), or teeth (coming out or in). If you correct an underlying issue you'll see a decrease or elimination of the need or at least a habit left that you can more easily address.

  17. I don't so couldn't vote however my son has an anaphylactic allergy to nuts and sesame.

     

    My father (in his 60's) is anaphylactic to aspirin, penicillin and tumeric.

     

    I do, however, think anaphylaxis is increasing as are asthma and allergies in general. Knowing why is harder....lower vitamin D levels may be playing a role. So might increases in medicine and lower infections rates in childhood. The body isn't busy fighting off common diseases and parasites. Countries where those two things are prevalent have, in my understanding, far less allergic conditions.

     

    Son with allergies is a fraternal twin. His brother has no allergies or asthma. His father and I don't have any either. Clearly there are genetics that interacts with those environmental factors.

     

    We were already homeschooling when he had his first anaphylactic reaction and we found out about the allergies. But I can't imagine sending my son to school w/this type of allergy. I imagine serious allergies are more prevalent in homeschoolers for that reason.

  18. My kids and I take it. It has helped with energy and muscle twitches/muscle pain for me. I had low coq10 as did one of my sons.

     

    We use this form. http://www.epic4health.com/ They carry Tischon brands. It's the type used in clinical trials for various conditions that respond to coq10. It's utilized much better by the body and it's the form geneticists and neurologists recommend. It's also got orphan drug status to treat various conditions.

  19. I read that a significant portion of those with IBS symptoms are found to have parasites (b. hominus is a big one only some labs look for). http://www.badbugs.org/parasite/irritable_bowel_syndrome.htm I read that because my son who was having persistent GI stuff was found to have that particular bug. We had done a metametrix comprehensive stool test that found it. Insurance reimbursed but we had to pay up front. He just finished 28 days of Alinia to treat it and his GI system seems normal again. Genova is another lab that will do full parasites including b. hominus and d. fragilis and other that cause this type of ongoing issue. Metametrix also looks at other digestion factors that might be an issue. I'd recommend testing for anyone with IBS.

     

    Outside of that probiotics can help some people though it wouldn't be a fix if parasites are the underlying thing.

  20. My husband and I were diagnosed with this recently. Both kids don't have it. We were actually testing us because of an infection my son has to make sure we didn't have his essentially. But we are both symptomatic. I suspect I've had this a long time because I had just thought that pain that came at times was part of life.

     

    We finished up a long course of Alinia to see if it gets it. Our doctor wasn't really pleased with the therapy usually given. If this doesn't work we're trying something holistic next that he recommends instead.

  21. Thank you guys! I was worried no one would have an idea.

     

    I'm confident he's holding too tightly to compensate! I know I keep thinking that not only is the angle off but he's got a death grip and is bearing down. But I didn't connect the two. I'm going to get those three sided things, work on the fine motor apart from writing more deliberately, try the rubber band thing with his crayons and switch to mechanical pencils!

     

    Thank you!

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