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What's with the ads?

#1 rebcoola

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Posted 02 October 2016 - 12:26 PM

  Story below is written by Flyer who is almost 8 and just starting 2nd grade she has had phonics, spelling & cursive but no grammar or writing lessons.  She wrote this for creative writing class at our ALE she brought to the first class and I don't know how much actual instruction their is in this class.  Mostly I am wondering if other people agree she has some talent? and what I should do with her?  This is new territory for me I am not a writer despite being a reader and DH and older DD are more STEM.

 

 

 

 

Hi I'm Tim, and I'm a monster. Yep a monster you may think I'm a werewolf or a zombie but you are way way way way way wrong. I'm a lava snake dragon I'm a 99 year old teen yes I'M A 99 YEAR OLD TEEN not a 13'14'15'16'17'18 or 19 year old. I'm 2 the size of a grown up but let's get to my story normal day at monster school It was time for blood sucking class for 27th grade. But I was goofing off I got a hall pass to the principal's office on my phone I ignored it and started goofing off and ding ding ding ding beep I got a call. I said hello I would have turned it down if I knew who was calling, it was the principal. So I canceled and went on with goofing off until I saw a town then I saw other monsters I said dang it I forgot lunch so I dove down to the town and caught a kid that was nice and yummy then sucked Its blood then ripped it in half and eat the inside and did that to 6 more kids then set off again then stopped at a volcano to see Deathskull. When I dove down in the volcano deathskull threw a skull full of lava I quickly flew to the left he threw another one I wasn't ready so it hit my belly deathskull just yelled yahoo I win oh ya oh ya while I was falling. When I hit the ground of the volcano he said 1 27th grader down 30 to go then at the exact time he said that I had grabbed some lava and a skull and hit him in the belly with the skull and then with the lava deathskull fell backwards ha ha 1 41th grader down I said. we both fell into laughter for about 2 minutes then when we went on a fly above a good looking town and dance in the sky all the people looked normal then we heard them say look at his leg he probably can't walk no reason to freak out we looked at each other deathskull your leg he had a very BIG arrow in his leg then a net got threw over us we tried to fly out but before you could say bock we were in a big room I got up and saw some people who looked like a nurs rolling me on some tabel I said who are you where's deathskull where am I one of the nurse calmed me down I fell down again why am I here I mean deathskull is the one with a big arrow in his leg what's wrong with me I asked he wouldn't let go of the other monsters  when we reached the lunch room she stopped but I kept going I said turns out they wouldn't let me go out even though you are the one with the big arrow in your leg hey deathskull said well if you're so good then prove it in a fight all the other monsters said ohhhhhhhhh and others would say fight fight fight fight fight fight fight and it was on. ready set go we fighted so much we nearly died.i hit him he hit me it was a raging battle we fighted and fighted tell we stopped and fell back

 


Edited by rebcoola, 02 October 2016 - 12:27 PM.


#2 luuknam

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Posted 02 October 2016 - 06:24 PM

She's definitely writing a lot more than my oldest did when he was her age. She might like a writing program, but I don't know what program to recommend. If it were my kid I'd make learning paragraph breaks a priority - my eyes are hurting just looking at that long piece of text.


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